#helpmeimcomfused

God, I'm exhausted. I guess that's what I get for going to sleep at fricking 1:00 AM and waking up at 4:30. I didn't even want to wake up, I was dreading senior year. I hate school. I hate everything but hey, only 10 months left... I honestly don't want to put effort in, but I always felt the urge to look decent. Maybe I'll wake up and be a sexy beast one day and suddenly boys will be like hot damn, and i'll just get a boyfriend like poof.

Hah, sike. A bitch thought.

I went to my closet, and pulled out what I had planned for today, Blue mom jeans, a black cropped sweatshirt, and my combat boots. As I put on my clothes I remembered Changbin. At least he doesn't know what I look like...

My makeup was simple, my eyebrows, some mascara, a few dabs of deep pink lipstick, and highlighter. For breakfast I had my usual sunny side up egg on toast, and then I headed out. When I got to school it was already busy. Everyone was standing with their big groups of friends and I shook my head. 

How are they so happy.

Yeah, maybe I was just being petty because I lowkey wished I had friends but I also just hate myself so...

The first half of the day dragged on.. It felt hours. When it was finally lunch I immediately went upstairs with my food and sat at my usual table in the cafeteria. The room started filling up and the table beside mine that usually stayed empty, stayed empty for the next few minutes. I sat there, reading my book and snacking on peppers. Suddenly the room went silent and a group of four guys walked in. I could tell everyone was eyeing their clothes, the Off-white, Vétement, Gucci, and they screamed rich.

Great, more spoiled kids in this school.

But then I realized, oh my god, one of them must be Changbin. Of course he's a spoiled asshole! I shook my head slightly, and the sounds of the cafeteria slowly picked up again. The boys continued walking though, and I tried to focus on my book. When I noticed they were heading to the empty table next to mine, I didn't even look up. I just prayed they weren't going to sit there.

All of a sudden a deep voice made me jump,

"Hi, sorry, didn't mean to scare you. I'm Changbin, that's Hyunjin, Jisung, and Chan."

My heart stopped, lord, these are beautiful people.

"Hi, nice to meet you." I said softly, and turned back to my book.

Sorry Changbin, I'm not looking for friends. I'm sure everybody in this school would love to be your pal. As I was turning, I caught the eye of one of the guys, he had beautiful lips, and he smiled softly.

Well shit.

Finally the day ended and I went home exhausted. Almost as soon as I flopped onto my bed for a nap, I got a message.

[Changbin]

i didn't see u today :(

[Me]

yeah oops!!

[Changbin]

do u wanna meet up tomorrow??

[Me]

uh probably not, imma be kinda busy i think.

Boy, just take a hint.

[Changbin]

awe ok... goodnight !!

The next day I had art first block and graphic arts second block, my two favorite classes! I walked into art. I didn't mind the people in art, mostly because everyone kind of just... minds their own business. I walked over to my corner I sat in last year and waited for people to show up. I waited and suddenly the boy who I thought had pretty lips walked in to the class. I expected him to go sit with the kids who have expensive clothes but to my surprise and maybe even dismay, he walked over and sat beside me.

"Hi, I'm Hyunjin!"

Why does my heart feel like this,

"I'm Alice..."

"How ar-"

The boy, Hyunjin, suddenly noticed I wasn't up to chatting and awkwardly grinned, silencing himself. The class went by surprisingly fast, usually the first few days are always boring.

When the bell rang I gathered my supplies and headed out the door... A hand on my shoulder caused me to flinch.

"S-sorry! I was just wondering what class you have now." Hyunjin yelped, letting go of me. I shook my head, ignoring him, and continued walking. I half expected him to stop following me but he ended up going with me all the way to graphic arts.

"Wow, what a coincidence." He chuckled, entering the class with me.

You have to be kidding me.

He didn't talk to me for the rest of class and I was low key thankful. Finally when it was lunch I escaped him and went up to my table, I was half hoping the four boys wouldn't come today. But as per usual, I was wrong and they entered. I looked up against my better judgement, and saw how good Changbin looked. I was captivated, though the sudden speaking of my name caused me to snap out of it. Hyunjin was at the table next to mine and he was sitting in the chair closest to mind, staring at me.

"Hey Alice, can we sit with you?"

| the end of part one |

TRANSLATIONS:

“야, 너 오는거야?”

MEANS

“Hey, are you coming?”

(Said informally to a younger person)