#helly x reader

Hey, I’m sorry I hadn’t noticed sooner. I thought you were just being a dick to me on purpose because I accidentally offended you or something, not because it was your evil-dictator self.

Yeah, that might be a little too hammy. But it had been true, whilst Helena was pretending to be your dear friend she had successfully pissed you off so much you just began to ignore her, at least enough to not see the red flags hidden beneath her actions. It began with malicious words then followed with hostile actions. You couldn’t begin to comprehend what may have triggered this fit of hate from Helly and every mending attempt you tried fell flat. You eventually gave up. How stupid you were.

Lost in the abyss of your mind you didn’t notice Helly staring right at your conflicted face. What you didn’t notice was that she wasn’t mad at you, she could never be. Dylan had explained most of what had happened while she was gone and she learned how Helena had treated you. If anything, she felt she had more of a reason to feel sorry.

“Hey…” Helly’s voice struck through the still air in the room. Your head snapped immediately towards the sound, eager. It was one of the first times she had talked to you directly since arriving at the office. “I apologize for anything I, um she, might’ve said while I was gone.”

You could only stare. She was apologizing to you? Your face softens and melts into an expression of grace. You could never understand how such a kind and beautiful soul could simultaneously be such a vile person. “Oh Helly,” You began, “I’m not mad at you. If anything I’m mad at myself. I should’ve recognized it wasn’t you, like Irving had.” Your eyes travel back down to your lap, not finding the strength to look her in the eyes. You felt humiliated.

“No, no, don’t be.” Helly’s voice felt so calming to you, like a warm hug. “You were blinded by her.”

“How could you be so sure?” You suddenly spit out, causing Helly to be taken aback. You knew this anger was misplaced and yet it felt good to finally air out. Although, as good as it felt, you couldn’t continue this war path. “I need some more paper clips.” Following your muttered statement you hastily stand and scrambled to the supply closet. But of course, Helly was persistent and stood just as quickly as you had.

“Hey,” Helly called your name with alertness. “Talk to me, okay?” When she realized you weren’t looking at her and rather the dozens of different office supplies she grabbed your shoulder and whipped you around.

“What?” Your tone was so sharp and you hated it.

“Please, you can tell me what’s wrong. I can handle it.” Her hands felt like they were mending into the skin of your shoulders, the sensation was addicting. It only made you angrier. You shoved her hands off of you, backing away ever so slightly into the corner, eyes still trained on her.

“What’s wrong is that it should have been obvious!” Your voice was raised and still Helly doesn’t flinch or fall back. “Helly you’re my best friend in here, the most important person I have ever known, and I couldn’t tell you were missing just because she spewed some fucking middle school insults at me? I don’t deserve your forgiveness, especially when I know that you wouldn’t have done the same! You would’ve fought back because that’s the kind of person you are. The kind I’ll never be.” It was an embarrassing confession and said in such a self-deprecating way, but she asked for the truth. Helly had stopped approaching you at this point and was just listening, silently and without judgement.

“Maybe, maybe I would have noticed. I don’t know. But she’s taken too much away from me to scare you away too!” Helly’s voice was now joining yours in volume, although you could tell her frustration was far from being directed towards you. “She took my job, she took Irving, and now she’s taking you! She even…” Helly sighed, now quieter. You leaned forwards, not sure of what she was about to say. “She even took what was supposed to be my first-time.”

You were puzzled. “First-time? What do you mean?” She only stared. To her, your question would have been humorous in any other context.

“Intercourse.” She replied. “Sex. It was with Mark, supposedly at the retreat you were on.” Her eyes seemed dim and sad. You felt the intense need to bring that shine back, the one you had grown so fond of. But for now, Helly’s words sunk into you like a dagger. Sex with Mark? Sure, they seemed close but you had never pegged them to be that close. The thought brought you a flurry of horrid feelings for reasons you couldn’t quite place.

“Oh,” You didn’t have words to offer. “I’m sorry.” The room grew quiet and just breathing felt like a painful task. You wished it was time to clock out. To break the awkwardness you turn to your right and miraculously find a box of paperclips. You send a fabricated smile while holding up the box and turning towards the door. You needed to escape, gather your thoughts. Right as your foot entered the doorway you heard Helly once again.

“It’s not that I’m mad she had sex with Mark specifically, I just… I’m mad she had that power over me. That she used me to manipulate someone else.” Your mind was spinning, the information too much to grasp.

Still staring at the ivory white door you reply, “I’m sure Mark understands.” Then, you choose your next sentence with cruelty. “Maybe if you talk to him he can make it up for you, reenact it, y’know?” You didn’t know why you said it, but you had. It didn’t fix the lingering feeling in your chest, the one that only got progressively worse with the thought of them together. Without another word you left Helly alone in the closet with only the after taste of your words.

—

It was nearing six forty-fix and everyone but you and Helly hadn’t clocked out yet. This was far from an ideal situation in your eyes, but it was the way it had happened. Since your conversation in the closet you’ve been lamenting over your choice of reactions. You were done being mad at yourself and just wanted to repair things with Helly once more, but said task was easier said than done. You didn’t know how to approach her and formally apologize.

Any words you thought up fell flat and so you opted for your next best form of communication. Helly’s eyes grew curious as she stared at the small note you had flicked in her direction. It was in the shape of a miniature paper airplane. Carefully unwrapping the note her eyes widened slightly at the contents.

Dear Helly,

I’m sorry for what I said earlier, I was a dick. You’re one of the only good things I have in this hellhole and I’d be an idiot to throw that away.

Love, …

Under the short letter was a subpar drawing of the two of you holding hands walking in the grass. There were flowers blooming under your feet and a sun shining directly on your two figures. It was simultaneously beautiful and sorrow-filled, knowing that you will likely never have the chance to do so in real life. The drawing itself was childish, but that did not prevent it from pulling on the strings of Helly’s heart.

In reply a note similar to yours flew on your desk, this time it was simply a crumbled ball rather than a meticulously folded airplane. Inside was a single drawn heart and a smile. You look up and see Helly beaming at you, and of course, you return the favor.

—

It was the next morning and you were the third to arrive behind Mark and Dylan. Passing Helly’s desk you saw the tiny note you had given her the day earlier, it was folded so only the drawing was visible and taped to her monitor. It made you feel warm.

“Hey, what ‘cha smiling at?” Dylan inquired you from over at his desk. He was sipping on piping hot coffee and staring at you expectantly. You simply shrug and continue over to your desk, plopping down in the chair.

“Nothin’. Just excited to work, aren’t you?” You dodge the question with humor, to which Dylan has a quick witted comment to like always.

“Oh I’m just jumping with joy.” You could tell he doesn’t believe you, but energy has been down since Irv has been gone so the conversation ended there. Ten minutes later Helly struts into the room, today she’s wearing a short blue dress. It’s not unlike her other attire, but you always found this specific dress to hug her body nicely. It was a pretty color on her too, complimenting her eyes in an attractive way. But of course you’d never say these things outloud, and so you substitute these comments with a curt smile.

The morning drags on and you decidedly run to the kitchen for a cup of coffee. Dylan’s smelled extra good this morning and you were ready to get in on that action. You were pouring a cup when you heard the click of heels enter the room. You didn’t need to raise your head to know who it was.

“Mind pouring me a cup?”

“That’s unlike you, you usually hate coffee.” You state, but still grabbing a cup to comply with her request nonetheless.

Helly shrugs at this comment, “I decided I wanted to try something new today I suppose.” She gratefully takes the cup out of your hand, fingers lingering over yours as she receives it. Raising the cup to her mouth, her lips tease the edge of the rim. The movement feels slow and deliberate, making a scene of her plump lips wrap around the edge. You felt embarrassed for staring and yet your eyes couldn’t pull away. You watch as her nude lipstick leaves a small rig around the rim of the cup and shivers. You cough and are about to excuse yourself until Helly interrupts.

“Wanna chat for a bit? I’m so bored out there today, I feel like everyone’s been down in the dumps.” You nod at her words and lean back on the counter you’re in front of.

“Sure, I get what you mean. Everyone’s on edge.” You take your own sip from your mug and fail to notice Helly’s own lasting stare. “What do you wanna talk about?”

“Well, I’ve been thinking recently, I know so much about you now, but you’ve never told me much about what you were like here before I came.” This piqued your interest.

“Well, what do you mean?”

“I dunno.” Helly shrugged despite very clearly having an idea in her mind, you just couldn’t figure out what it was. “What did you do for fun? Was it always Cobel? Do you have any other friends?”

You giggled at her enthusiasm. “Uh, well for fun it’s kinda just the same basic stuff I do now. Just drawing, talking, that kind of thing. And yes, it’s always been Cobel, as long as I’ve been here at least. Other friends? Never. I didn’t come here too long before you so Dylan, Irv and Mark are the only other refiners I’ve come to know, other than you of course.” Helly seemed interested in what you had to say, like she was exploring a whole new side of yourself.

Then, Helly’s next question almost made you spit out your coffee; “Did you ever… have your first-time?” You were used to sharing everything and anything with Helly, but never had you expected this question to come out of her mouth.

“Uh, I, well no…” You began, stuttering every word. “There’s no one here I’ve ever been attracted to in that way…” You could never imagine doing such a thing with the three refiners you’ve come to know and love. Before Helly you were very close with them, but nothing romantic had ever occurred. They were more like brothers to you, a platonic love. But then, what about the woman who was standing right before you? You had never thought about Helly in that way before, but now that you do it makes a heat crawl up the back of your neck, your toes tingle. It was a strange sensation, but not a disturbing one.

“Ah, okay. Sorry if that freaked you out or anything, I was just wondering if you had an idea of what I missed out on with Mark at the retreat.” Helly brushed off. This thought quickly dulled the pleasant one in your mind with something rotten. Right, she and Mark had technically “done it”. But also, it wasn’t really Helly so did it count?

“Yeah unfortunately I wouldn’t know.” You smiled and Helly took another sip, her lips pursing at the brim. The heat was back, but now it was also pooling in your stomach and traveling lower. It was wrong, you knew it was wrong, but you were imagining a timeline where it was you in that tent instead of Mark, and instead of Helena it was Helly. You could feel yourself visibly getting hotter. You needed to think of an excuse, anything to leave the room and cool down, but of course Helly had to interfere with your plans.

“Are you okay? You look flushed, you’re not getting sick are you?” Helly leaned closer and placed her coffee cup down on the counter. Before you could protest she was already approaching you and placing the back of her hand on your burning forehead. “You feel hot.” How badly you wanted to nuzzle into her touch, indulge yourself in her presence, but instead you stood like a deer in headlights.

“I just-” You need to think of an excuse, anything to get out of this predicament with your dignity, but it was hard when Helly was so close and so kissable. “I’m feeling a little conflicted is all…” This statement made something in her eyes shimmer, something deep.

“Oh, yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“Maybe I can help with that…?” Her tone was curious and challenging. Her piercing eyes slowly gazed at your pressed lips. Subconsciously, you drag your tongue over them, wetting the surface. It felt like she knew exactly what you wanted but was unsure if you wanted to go through with it.

“Maybe you could.” Your voice was now a mere whisper, a quiet statement said just between you two. Your hand gingerly reached for her arm, scared if your movements were too bold she’d realize what she was doing and back away.

“Y’know, Mark wouldn’t be my first choice for my ‘first-time’.” This caught your attention. Helly’s eyes stared into yours through her eyelashes, daringly.

You gulped, “And who would be?”

“I think you can guess…” Her lips were tantalizingly close to yours, the tip of her nose just hovering over yours. She was all too close and yet not close enough. You feel the hot breath of her mouth on yours, it was intoxicating.

“Milchek?” All Helly could do was laugh before making the move to connect your lips and hers. You gasp as her lipgloss merges with your own and mixes with the spit of your hungry mouth. As the kiss deepened Helly leaned you back further on the counter, her hand gripping your waist. Your own hand was still on her bicep, squeezing for dear life as your other hand placed itself on her lower back. For someone who had never kissed someone as herself before Helly was amazingly skilled. She would nip and tug on your lip with precision, unlocking noises from you you’d yet to hear. Now that you had a taste for this sensation you never wanted to part, but unfortunately air was needed. You parted with a wet smack, deep breaths filling the air. You both didn’t move, taking in the moment.

“I-” Before Helly could speak you feverishly clung to her body and pulled her back in. You were not going to give this moment up too quickly. Helly didn’t seem opposed to this notion and quickly continued back in the rhythm. Her hands ran up and down your sides, sending a shiver throughout your body. You were growing hotter by the moment and found yourself cupping at Helly’s body. First her hips, then a little lower to grasp her ass. She responds to your motions with a grunt, which you took as permission to explore further.

Whilst your hands begin to move up again Helly detached herself from your lips. Before you could question her, you felt your neck get attacked by a flurry of kisses. You let out a small whine, trying to be careful as the guys were only so far away, but Helly’s mouth was making it hard to focus. Her lips slowed down into passionate kisses on the side of your neck before finding that sweet spot, the one that made you bunch her clothes up in your hands and shakily breathe out her name. You could feel her smirk against your neck before she started a light sucking motion. Your eyes close in a fit of pleasure, the sensation being the best you’ve felt for your short life. You truly believed it couldn’t get better than this. Your stomach’s heat was growing, alongside something right below. You’ve never felt such a thing before but you quickly recognized it as being aroused.

As Helly’s mouth diligently worked away at your neck, your hands ran up the outside of her dress and found her breasts. Immediately you began cupping them like a starved man. You wish she was wearing a shirt so you could feel them skin to skin, but the dress allowed for little access to such. Without thinking, you grabbed for the zipper of her dress before she slowly pulled away. You almost pouted like a damn kicked puppy as she released you.

With a sympathetic look she whispered, “Not here, they’ll see us.” Her hands were still on your body but you felt absent and pent up. You couldn’t stop, not now, not ever. It had felt too good, how are you supposed to go on your mundane day without such a feeling?

“Please Helly…” You were now begging, pawing at her dress and almost falling to your knees. “Please, I need you. Be my first.” Your pleading clearly had an affect on her as she appeared to be just as disheveled and turned on as you were, which only made you worse.

She leaned in towards your ear, eerily steadily. “Bathroom.” You could only nod, looking in her eyes once more. You let her drag you with one arm, confidently walking with that walk you’ve come to adore. If you could see yourself right now you feel like you’d have love hearts for eyes. You didn’t even mind the fact Dylan was gone when you two sauntered past, or the fact that Mark didn’t even question what the two of you were doing, still on his unresolved rampage. Dude just needs to get laid, you snicker in your mind as you allow yourself to be a ragdoll in Helly’s hands.

It felt too long before you were both in the bathroom, door locked, with Helly’s lips back attacking yours. Before this you never knew how physically possible it was to need someone so bad. Finally, you had the chance to find the zipper on her back and begin tugging on it. Before you get to the bottom you suddenly pull away.

“This is okay that I’m doing this, right?” Above all else, above the passion and lust, you wanted to be sure Helly was comfortable.

“More than okay..” She kissed your cheek. “You can devour me if you wish.” That was all you needed to hear before reconnecting and undressing her. You fumbled with the hook on her bra as she began making her way on your body. You were wearing a shirt and skirt, much easier access than she had been wearing. Her slim hands easily slid under the cotton fabric and under your black bra. Your attempts with her bra only got sloppier as she began to toy with your own breasts, fingertips running over your hard nipple sending a jolt through your body. You’re left breathless as she continues to grope you from under the fabric, swirling over your buds with precision. Whether it was muscle memory from her outie or she was naturally just this good at pleasure you were unsure, but damn were you happy.

Finally, you unhook her bra and her perky tits are released, the cold air causing them to harden. You stared at the display like you’ve never seen anything more beautiful in your life, and perhaps you truly hadn’t. Before you could even think about it, your mouth latched onto her neck and slowly peppered kisses further and further down her body, stopping only just before her nipple. Helly breathed out your name as your lips slowly enveloped the bud, sucking just the tiniest bit releasing a moan from Helly. You smiled, enjoying being the reason for her pleasure and sucked harder. Her hands find your hair and firmly grip the locks, holding you in place. As your mouth worked its magic your hands traveled to her underwear. You lightly push her legs apart and run one finger down the fabric which led to an audible moan.

Before you could continue, Helly pulled your hair up, taking your head with it. “It’s not fair you still get to be clothed while I’m like this.” She stated, surprisingly well put together despite the situation. You can only nod in reaction and she found the hem of your shirt and slowly pulled it over your head. “Beautiful…” She muttered, staring at you like a piece of art. Smoothly, she pursed her lips on the top of your right breast and began sucking. After a short time she pulls away and reveals in the sight of the hickey she graciously placed on your chest.

Then, her hands play with the zipper on your skirt, almost teasing you with how slow she was working with the mechanism. “Helly…” You warned, ready to tackle her as your underwear feels wetter by the moment. She only smiles and pulls your skirt down ever so slightly faster. After what feels like an eternity you’re staring there in your underwear and bra with Helly right across from you.

“Now we’re even.” She teases and steps forward, sandwiching you between the counter and herself. Her hand finds its way towards your underwear, dragging two of her fingers over the cloth. “You’re so wet, and just for me huh?”

“Who else?” You playfully say, pulling her closer with a handful of ass. She rolls her eyes before slipping the same two fingers under the fabric and grazing your folds with them, a shaky breath escaping you. You groan a bit, influencing her to keep dragging her fingers back and forth. Her other hand making its way to your bra, skillfully unclipping the clothing with one hand, and cupping your bare breast. She begins fondling and kneading your skin, it felt euphoric to have her touching so many sensitive places at one time. “Keep going…” Is all you can whisper out as she continues rubbing you.

She runs her fingers purposely over the sensitive bean at the top of your clit, sending shockwaves of pleasure to your core. As you’re practically gasping for air she teases your hole with a finger before inserting it into you. Helly curled the finger in and out, touching places you’ve never felt before. You didn’t know such a feeling was possible, let alone achievable with such simple touches. Helly was absolutely addicting. You needed more of her.

You hungrily kiss her once again, which causes Helly to halt in her fingering. You whine at the lack of sensation and begin riding your hips back and forth on her hand like an animal. You should have been humiliated, but all you needed right now was her touch. You felt her hand leave your breast and place itself on your hips, guiding them up and down her finger. You begin panting from the combined movement and increasing pit in your stomach.

“You feel,” You grunt a bit, not able to form full sentences, “so good.” It didn’t take long for Helly to add a second finger after your statement, making your back arch against the cool tiles.

“Good, good. That’s why I’m here baby.” Helly coos in your ear, now adding her own motion against your rocking hips. Her thumb was now rubbing over your sensitive spot at the top while her other fingers were effectively exploring every spot of your inner core. You didn’t know how much more you could take with the pit in your stomach growing fast and hard. It felt so overwhelming and yet you never wanted to stop. Your loud moans filled the bathroom and you couldn’t bring yourself to care if others could hear. In your world all it was right now was you, Helly, and her fingers violating your insides.

Upon hearing your sounds of approval Helly whispered in your ear, “You almost there beautiful?” You could only nod, feeling the band inside you coming so close to snapping. “That’s a good girl, let it happen.” Her words filled you with something you couldn’t describe and, all too suddenly, you feel yourself let loose. A surge of endorphins send themselves throughout your entire body, from your brain to your fingertips to your toes. There was no feeling like it, pure bliss. Helly’s fingers were now slowing down, feeling your walls clench on them. She slowly pulled out as you leaned your sweaty body forward and kissed the side of her cheek.

“I hope you had a good first time.” She whispered to you, her head resting on your shoulder and her hand rubbing your back with fondness. You nodded, exhaustedly. Who knew such a wonderful feeling could take so much out of a person? But you weren’t done yet.

“I did,” You muttered against her cheek, “And now it’s your turn.”

“Wha-” Before Helly could finish her question you flipped her over so she was now leaning on the counter.

“You really think I’d let you do that to me and then not give you the same treatment?” You say it like it should be so obvious, which in your opinion it should. You tap on the counter behind you. “Up.” Helly nods and does as you wish. With how assertive she is at times, she can also be so beautifully submissive to you. “Lean back.” She follows without question, washing as you now look at her on display, only her underwear remains. That will have to change. With a swift motion you take off the fabric, they were ruined anyway. Now all that remains is the beautiful image of Helly staring at you with full attention.

You take your hands and slowly pry her legs wide open. You lean forward, sure with your motions as your lips meet her slit. You drag your tongue up, slowly but surely, eliciting a quick shiver from the woman before you. Then, a slower drag. Then faster. You began to pick up a rhythm, one that Helly seemingly agreed with as she began practically grinding on your face, not wanting the motion to stop. “Yes, right there!” She pleads, encouraging you to keep going. Your nose was ever so slightly hitting her bud, increasing her pleasure. You could tell she was getting close by the way her breathing quickens and her motions get sloppy. After about thirty more seconds she unravels in front of you, riding her high through your persistent licks and motions. Shortly after you pulled away and watched as she sat up.

Even in her disheveled state she looked utterly beautiful. You looked at her as if she were a piece of art and wrapped your arms around her waist, a motion she returned. “Thank you, for being my first.” She whispered, embracing your body.