hello students of our dear school! as you may or may not know, a few delinquents foolishly thought that the turning of the decade would distract our watchful, benevolent administrators and acted out. they decided that the school administrators were “tyrannical” and “killed too many students." now, we all know that’s ridiculous and i would really rather not get into it so... long story short, my beautiful printing press from the late 1600s was doused in cheap alcohol and burned down, along with the rest of the west part of the Office.
while this is extremely unfortunate and quite literally hurt me very much, i am not mad anymore. holding onto hatred for those who have passed away is not healthy at all! so, the administrators have assigned me this digital medium where i will continue to report our news. now you no longer have to cough up slips of paper covered in your blood whenever i feel the need to publish news stories and important notices! i am. not. upset at all! this is a good thing for all of us! i look forward to this new chapter in our lives everyone :))
