#hellnohellsingsues

I'm doing it

I'm sporking the shitty HansxOC smut in the Hellsing tag to submit it to HellnoHellsingsues

Pray for me

Thank you! You're a flawless human being yourself! I really enjoyed perusing your Tumblr. I'll have quite a few submissions for you in the future, but I'm not sure if that's a good thing.

I actually did a bit of sporking myself once. It was a one-time thing; I came across this terrible IntegraxSeras gunplay fic that I simply could not pass up. If you'd like to check it out, here's the link:

http://weepingcock.livejournal.com/672710.html

Gladly. Here, I shall enlighten you:

Calling Twinenigma a smartass on livejournal.

Calling atpinball a faggot.

Strongly implying that the reason Twinenigma is a bitter cunt was because of her fat thighs and overall ugly cosplay.

Being accused of tracing fanart, reported for it, but not banned or suspended or anything remotely reprimanded for it because.... LE GASP..... I DIDN'T TRACE IT.

Not shipping AxI. (this is important)

Being mean to Goblincreations for being retarded.

Laughing at Iheartexploding's shitty AxI fanart.

Actually reading Dracula and informing people who make comparisons between Dracula and Hellsing that all of their information and "evidence" for supporting AxI as a parallel to Dracula/Mina was false, since Dracula and Mina had no romantic relationship whatsoever.

Calling ViciousKwEeN every horrible name in the book after she made several offensive comments about rape and pedophilia all in the hopes of defending her OTP Freddy/Nancy from the Nightmare on Elm Street remake. This ranged form saying that rape was NOT a form of sexual assault to raping a child is not worse than raping an adult. AND WAS BEING SERIOUS. (no really, this actually had nothing to do with AxI whatsoever, but because she's an Integra cosplayer and an AxI shipper, the Hellsing fans got their panties in a huge fucking bunch over it)

Referring to Integra as "masculine."

Making fun of Artema after she flipped the fuck out for me referring to Integra as masculine.

Calling Saintedsin a mediocre cosplayer and subsequently mocking her for the shitfest of hers that followed afterwards.

Mocking Saintedsin further by creating stamps that parodied her ridiculously butthurt AxI ones.

Proving that HellsingThess was indeed LYING that 伯爵 (hakushaku) and　卿 (kyo) were gender neutral terms and meant "Count/Countess" or "Lord/Lady" when in reality they were always male terms, therefore Alucard was calling Integra "Count" and NOT "Countess" for the entire time (and actually backing up this discovery with a Japanese college professor's confirmation).

Pretty much proving Thess wrong on just about every account as she is fucking retarded.

Dressing up as a maid Integra specifically to piss off retarded Hellsing fans AND SUCCEEDING.

Having OCs. No really. Not even remotely horrible ones (or if they were, they progressed over time). Just having them in general and putting them into the Hellsing storylines.

Not being nice to retarded Hellsing fans on tumblr.

Calling out Hellsing fans on their double standards and hypocrisies when they want to play the "HOMG YOU TELL PEOPLE TO GO AND KILL THEMSELVES AND THAT IS UNFORGIVABLE AND SERIOUS FUCKING BUSINESS" while completely ignoring the fact that several other Hellsing fans have done terrible things to people that they don't like that personally affected their lives. But because those people are big name fans and great cosplayers and ship AxI, their actions are perfectly justified.

Telling people to go kill themselves on tumblr and then repeating that phrase over and over again when I realize how much it bothers them.

Having an Anti-AxI club on deviantart.

Acknowledging that Romancia did not make Alucard/Integra canon nor did it put them on the equal terms, since they're right back to being Master and Servant yet again.

Also for making fun of the AxI fans who blew this scene all out of proportion before the scans were even released strictly because of how unromantic it was.

Being mean to friends of people I don't even know despite the fact that more often than not, their friends are the ones coming to my pages to try and start shit and can't handle the response they get. I don't think I'd have a problem with half of the people I have problems with if they weren't friends with fucktards.

Possibly being unimpressed with Icequeenserenity's Seras cosplay, but considering there were a good handful of people who agreed with my opinion on the matter, I'm not sure. But I'm sure someone would find a reason to get pissed about it.

Making fun of e-mails exchanged between Artema and Seraphim-Sephiroth which resulted in the latter being pissed off that she was being fronted off to the people she was making fun of. Because that's what neutral parties do when there's a confrontation: make fun of one party to another in secret.

Acknowledging the fact that saying "Integra is not a sexual character" is NOT "slut shaming" and labeling the people who think so as fucking morons.

I usually tend to upset the boyfriend/girlfriend/sockpuppet account of a Hellsing fan. Then I upset them further by continuously annoying their significant other/original account.

Bringing it to the attention of the AxI fanbase that Alucard was not groping Integra at all in that picture, as his hand is near her stomach and far away from her boobs.

So yeah. I think that just about covers it. I'm sure there are plenty things I'm leaving out but I'll be sure to add to the list when they occur to me.