#haselmaus

“Really, it’s quite simple! You all have burning questions in your hearts, and we’re here to answer them! But! We can’t do so for free.”

Märzhase adjusts their jacket, content to be back in their typical attire.

“I screened countless magi, and found your curiosity was the strongest of those I investigated; whether you’re consciously aware of such a thing or not.”

Standing beside Chuubey and Haselmaus, The March Hare studies you all with a glowing smile ill-fitting of his words.

“So the way to get the answers to your question is simple: die, or kill another person, and my sister and I will impart our knowledge onto you.”

Their cheerfulness rings hollow as the city seems to stand still in these moments. Perhaps this was something members of your group had speculated, but it was different hearing this proclamation spoken so bluntly.

“Of course, this isn’t the only reason we need you to kill each other: but the particulars of that are best left to the Incubators and ourselves. After all, Chuubey has been instrumental in this process! Hasel and I would hate to disappoint them now.”

The Moon Rabbit says nothing, instead watching you all with that typical neutrality. Though, you can’t help but feel a sense of satisfaction rolling off of them. Märzhase continues steadily.

“Before you whine that “you would NEVER do such a thing” or how “the power of friendship ” will power you through: for magi, to take life is a trivial matter, especially when you only serve to gain from it. I expect we’ll need to give you some more concrete motivation from time to time, but we here in the City of Rumors believe in letting you choose your own destinies! So, we’ll give you time to consider our offer. It’s not like you’ll be going anywhere.”

That last line - maybe it was a shock to you, maybe it confirms what you already knew. Either way, your hosts give that time to sink in.

“With all the…. excitement out of the way, um. This is all a lot to digest, sooooo… did anyone have any additional questions…?”

Haselmaus’s voice trails off towards the end as she looks to the group of Magi.

Naturally, there would be many. Panic, bargaining, threats, and arguing would overtake the group, though all of it would fall on deaf and unfeeling ears.

No matter what was said or done, the Magi were now firmly in the clutches of these mysterious siblings and their former mentor.

Life in The City of Rumors was proving to be a deadly one. Unfortunately, this would only serve to be the beginning.

Prologue End

As the clouded curtains rise on this scene, ”Alice” and the The Killer are having what appears to be a tense conversation. While you know who should be under that mask of shadows, it appears their identity is being obscured at first. Regardless, the two stand in the Trial Room of the Clocktower silently arguing, before “Alice” splits a grin and says a few choice words.

“I know you’re mad now, buuut~! If you play along, I can make it up to you.” “Y-You-! Ugh!” The indistinct voice stutters back, hands on hips, “Fine! But you’re still the worst, Märzie.”

The two enter calmer talks, and shortly after will the vision shift to the two in Chuubucks. Alice sits at the counter, kicking their feet idly as the killer makes an ungodly complicated drink. They seem displeased by the request, but The Mayor’s word wasn’t one they could defy. So, The Killer slides over the drink with crossed arms and watches as Alice takes a hearty sip…

The impish smile on their face grows as they pull the mug from their lips… and throw it with impossible strength and speed into the wall. They stick out their tongue with displeasure.

“This is all wrong! Bleh!” Alice squints at their killer, a sadistic smile decorating their lips. “You’ve gotta do it again-”

And this, rightfully, seems to be the final straw. With little warning, The Killer launches over the counter of Chuubucks effortlessly: knocking Alice to the floor as both hands connect to their shirt. The rest of what comes plays out much like a Looney Toons skit of The Killer tossing Alice through the window and summoning a lantern staff, though not without the small magus catching a fistful of their glittering cloak before being defenestrated.

The Mayor in disguise is smart enough to begin sprinting through the streets, taking paths away from where any potential Magus were relaxing. The culprit follows in close pursuit, snapping their fingers to switch the Chuubucks sign to close as they go.

With little other place to run, Alice takes a desperate break for the stairs: but not before being propelled forward by the force of a grand fireball slamming into the plaza. Their leg and a grazed cheek seems to take most of the blow as they fall forward, but continue scrambling up the stairs while they dodge more arcs of enraged fire.

Finally reaching the Clocktower Balcony, the victim falls winded to their knee. The Killer wastes little time in jumping up to grasp the large hour hand and pull it down to their level.

In one swift movement, you’re forced to watch as Alice is impaled through the stomach and lifted high into the air by their killer’s jump: only to be mounted up on the face of the Clocktower itself. As they let out a dramatic, bone-chilling cry, Haselmaus steps back with a roll of the eyes and a scowl.

He owes her for this! Dispelling any splatters of blood from her cloak, The Deputy disappears in a puff of smoke only shortly before the group emerges at the summit of the stairs: discovering “Alice”s body.

The vision fades…

“…I see.”

Chuubey sounds vaguely displeased as they turn their head to the other hosts.

“I will need to speak to you both later. But, for now-”

The rabbit turns back to the citizens,

“There you have it.”

The person you knew as Alice stands at the top of the stairs with hands on hips. Despite the now dried blood covering their midsection and chest, the person before you looks little worse for wear. They grin at the group.

“Surprised? Maybe a few’ve you are! Though it’s nice to see that some of you are sharper than you look!”

The boy’s meeker utterances and uncertainty have all but evaporated since the last you saw them. Those brown eyes widen to study the group with curiosity.

“Ah… But I guess a couple people still need their hand held. No matter! Allow me to finally make my entrance.”

In a glittering flash of pink and gold, Alice’s entire body is engulfed in light. With a few showy twirls, he slides over to the empty seat and turns back towards you all. Once the light subsides, all of you are now able to see them in their full glory.

Looking a few inches taller, the strange individual stands bowed, adorned in an elegant but whimsical suit and cape. In their hand they hold a top hat and move to put it on once they stand to their full height; but not without snapping their fingers to cause their bunny ears to appear back on their head.

“As The Mayor of this fine city, I’m excited to finally welcome you: my dear citizens! My real name is Märzhase, so do call me that instead.”

He pauses to let this new information sink in. That pathetic boy you all had rushed to save… the one who had been making friendly with you this entire day… was the suspiciously absent Mayor this whole time? The rabbit boy who had visited you all in your dreams was “Alice”?

They had put you through all of this for-?

“I hope you can forgive some deception! After all, if you couldn’t solve something as simple as this: there was never any hope for you here in the first place.”

Haselmaus rolls her eyes as Märzhase talks, already over his theatrics. But when he pauses, she takes a moment to butt in.

“S-sorry that I fooled you, everyone!”

She glances out of the corner of her eye at Chuubey apprehensively, but carries on from her seat.

“You see, the Mayor roped me into this plan of his - introducing you to trials was part of their special welcome for you. But they got a little…. um. Carried away with it.”

“Hope you enjoyed your little undercover act, Märzie,” she says to them pointedly. She was still mad about the sudden change in schedule. “I don’t even know where you got that weird shirt from…”

Then, she rubs the back of her neck, embarrassed.

“And then I got a liiiiiiittle carried away with it. But, um. All’s well that ends well! Alice is perfectly fine, you see! So, um…… surpriiiiiise! No one’s dead.” “I did, thank you!" Märzhase chirps, ignoring the other's sarcasm. "And you played your part well~ Though-”

He grimaces.

“I know I said you could be as rough as you wanted, but that HURT. Really! You’re such a mean older sister.”

He pouts, much to his sibling's growing irritation.

“Did you really have to throw the coffee cup against the wall,” she says, exasperated. “Honestly…!”

Haselmaus. While the mouse-eared woman had been nothing but sweet to the group as she rushed around attending to chores; nobody else seemed so capable. While the thought of the cute barista land-blasting poor Alice with fire magics was almost impossible to imagine, the Deputy found no need to argue.

In fact, she would encourage the group right up until the votes were finalized.

...

Haselmaus claps her hands together, looking at your little group proudly.

“Good job, everyone! You got me! Thank g-goodness - I was getting really tired of going along with this silly little game.”

She doesn’t seem upset about being found out. If anything, she’s relieved. And looks kinda worn out by all this.

“You were right, right, right! You see, ‘Alice’-“ the name is said politely enough, but there’s an undercurrent of annoyance there. “-he came into my little shop and ordered that super complicated drink. It was hard, but… I made it! Just as he wanted it.”

She frowns, tssking.

“….but then that bully had the nerve to say I made it all wrong! And I don’t make drinks wrong, so I knew he was doing it to make me mad! Even worse - he yelled at me and threw his coffee against the wall, m-making a big ol’ mess! And I just mopped, you see, and that made me really mad, so I…”

Haselmaus summons her weapon - a gnarled wooden staff with a golden lantern at the top. Purple gems and golden stars hang from the metal, twinkling in the light. Abruptly, she swings it like a baseball bat with supernatural strength. Sparks and white flames erupt from it in an arc, flying over the assembled Magi.

“….boom! Right through the glass. Then one thing led to another. Eheh….”

Haselmaus rubs the back of her neck, smiling like she’s embarrassed by her slip in composure.

“Aw, beans! What’s all this, then?”

She assesses the damage caused by the Witch Fight, scanning the group of Magi with a mixture of worry and utter bafflement. Seemingly at a loss for words, her mouth opens, closes, and opens again as she decides on what exactly to say to the sight in front of her. 

“You are…” she says, slowly. “...NOT supposed to be here yet!!!”

She pouts, shifting in place nervously before saying several different things quickly in succession.

“I haven’t even set up the welcoming ceremony! I’m only half done baking the cupcakes! Who let you in? How’d you get here? WHAT HAPPENED OVER HERE?” 

She takes a head count, pointing to each member of your little group in turn. Eighteen, nineteen, twenty, twenty one…? The final number confuses her before she looks at a member of your little group more closely. Her left eye twitches, and she holds eye contact with Alice for five seconds too long.

"....I don't recall you being given an invitation."

"ᵉᵉᵏ!"

They flinch a little and just hide a little more into Shun, who has opted to carry them. Haselmaus stares a few seconds more before shaking her head to hide her annoyance.

“....aaaaaanyway! Early or not, um. Welcome to the City of Rumors, everyone! My name is Haselmaus!”

Surprise all but shaken off at this point, she smiles pleasantly at the group in front of her.

“I’m super sorry for not meeting you here sooner, but I’m glad you all made it to our city safely! Thank you for defeating that nasty Witch! I won’t forget your kindness to our City.”

Imperceptibly, she sighs.

“Um. The Mayor of the city was… supposed to meet you here while I made sure your welcoming party was all set and ready to go. But… something seems to have gone awry. But d-don’t worry! I’ll go find them and tell them you’ve all arrived! You can count onnnnnn me!”

With a snap of her fingers, each of you watch as a crystal, heart-shaped locket floats in the air before you.

“For now, take these! They should help you navigate this area in the meantime! The Mayor can explain it a biiiit better, so I’ll hurry up and look!”

Haselmaus turns on her heel with her cupcakes carefully balanced in one hand, then turns back just as fast. 

“Um! If any of you need me for anything, I’ll be around the city looking for our most esteemed Mayor. Simply track me down if you need anything! Or, if you cannot find me… ring the bell in the cafe over there-” she gestures towards the brick building she came from earlier “-and I’ll be there in two shakes of a lamb’s tail! Promise!” 

NAME: Haselmaus ROLE: Host TITLE: The Deputy of the City of Rumors

"Have you heard? Has anyone told you? The rumor of the cheese in the mouse trap? They say you can get everything you want if you’re quick enough and smart enough. But if you’re not... SNAP! Have you heard? Do you think it's real?"

The softhearted second-in-command that assists the Mayor with the less glamorous aspects of running the City of Rumors. Haselmaus ensures that everything is managed smoothly behind the scenes.

In addition to citywide administration, she’s the owner, operator, and barista of every cafe across the City of Rumors! Haselmaus is the more levelheaded of the siblings who serve as your hosts. Whether you need a listening ear or hot latte, she’s always around to offer whatever help she can!

_________________________

Rumor’s Suavium is an 18+ rp group containing a Puella Magi Madoka Magica-inspired magic system mixed with a Danganronpa-styled Killing Game format. The group, with a roster of 16 characters selected from apps, will be hosted almost exclusively on Discord with game posts, updates, and summaries appearing on the game blog! Intended to run on a flexible 5  week schedule, there will also be mechanics of role-playing games akin to Pokemon Mystery Dungeon as well as general tabletop rpg.

♡ About: https://rumors-suavium.tumblr.com/about

♡ Rules: https://rumors-suavium.tumblr.com/rules

♡ Game Mechanics: https://rumors-suavium.tumblr.com/gamemechanics

♡ Mod Team: https://rumors-suavium.tumblr.com/mods