#harude

Rei is still in tears, but this time he’s clinging onto Nagisa, squeezing the life out of him. He’s still so much smaller than him - Nagisa had been hoping for a growth spurt, but unfortunately, it just hadn’t happened - but Nagisa’s arms are wrapped around Rei’s middle and he’s practically shaking with the force of his sobs.

“Rei-chan, Rei-chan,” Nagisa wails, and it isn’t beautiful at all and their fellow graduates are staring at them with puzzled looks, but Rei couldn’t care less, holding onto Nagisa just as tight. “We aren’t going to ride the train to school together anymore, and we aren’t going to swim together anymore, and I won’t get to see your butterfly stroke anymore, and what if– what if we stop talking, what if we drift apart, what if, what if, what if–”

“Nagisa-kun,” Rei manages, pulling back to settle a hand on his tiny shoulder and give it a squeeze. He has to put on a brave face. Until they walk out of these school gates, he’s still Iwatobi’s captain. “That is not going to happen. We might have gotten into different universities, but that doesn’t mean we can’t make this work. We will. I promise we will. We’re friends, after all. The others did it, didn’t they?”

Friends. They’re friends.

“Promise?” Nagisa asks, staring up at Rei with wide, hopeful eyes, everything resting on Rei’s answer. Rei swallows. He wishes he could lean down and kiss him right then and there. He doesn’t, though.

“I promise.”

Rei had promised something else, too, back when Haru and Makoto had graduated. He promised himself that, by the time this day came, he’d confess to Nagisa. He’d tell him.

He never kept that promise, and when he and Nagisa part ways as the sun sets behind the trees, he realizes that maybe Nagisa was right. Maybe he’d break this one, too.

—

Nagisa studied hard enough to get into a decent university thanks to Rei’s tutoring, but Rei is miles and miles away. They text constantly, good morning and good night, Nagisa’s texts littered with emoji. They call when they aren’t too busy and talk about absolutely nothing for hours, gossiping about other students and complaining about the terrible workload that comes with university life and other inane things. Things are normal. Everything is normal. Rei was wrong - they’re still friends. Just friends, and that’s alright.

But.

“I miss Rei-chan,” Nagisa whispers into the phone one night, curled up in his bed, clutching it close and listening to Rei’s breathing on the other end. A long silence passes before Rei responds. There are so many things he wants to say; no mathematical equation could ever solve every possible outcome to every possible confession that he could make.

“Me too.”

They don’t hang up. Instead, they end up falling asleep just like that, holding their phones until their batteries run out.

—

Haru and Makoto keep in touch. So does Rin. They aren’t able to see each other as a group unless they’re on break, but when they do, they’re inseparable, treasuring every single second of time they have together. No matter what, the five of them will always, always be a team. No distance will change that.

But occasionally, Nagisa will pull Rei aside and lean into him and– he did grow taller, just a little, but he’s still shorter than Rei is, and he’s so beautiful, maybe even more beautiful than he was in high school, and Rei lost his chance. 

—

“Will you go out with me?” Nagisa asks when they’re nearing the end of their first year of university. Rei almost drops his cell phone.

“Pardon? I think… I think I might have misunderstood.”

“Will. You. Go. Out. With. Me?” Nagisa repeats, carefully punctuating every word. Rei’s mouth is hanging open. “Will Rei-chan be my boyfriend?”

“I– Nagisa-kun–”

“Look outside your dorm window,” Nagisa replies, laughter in his voice. Rei is confused, but he humors him, standing up from his desk and stepping over to his closed window.

Nagisa is down there smiling and waving, definitely breaking rules about trespassing on campus without a care in the world. It’s the most ridiculously cliche confession that Rei has ever seen.

He bolts downstairs and out the door to scoop him up, swing him around, and press a kiss to his lips that he’s been waiting three years to give him.

—

TWO MONTHS LATER:

“Why didn’t you ever confess to me back in high school?” Nagisa asks suddenly, kicking a pebble as they walk. “Do you know how long you kept me waiting? I was starting to think that maybe you didn’t like me after all.” He’s visiting again. The distance takes hours by train, but they switch off every weekend.

Rei turns and looks at him, studying him carefully. It takes a bit before he replies.

“Because I was a coward,” Rei confesses, startlingly honest. “I was terrified of change. I was terrified you’d reject me. I didn’t want to ruin what we already had. I… I treasured it too much.”

Nagisa frowns, hanging his head and mulling it over. The only reason his bangs don’t fall into his eyes is because they’re pinned up with two strawberry hair clips Rei had bought him as a graduation gift. He couldn’t help but notice that he’s almost never seen Nagisa without them on since.

“But all that time, I was waiting for you. I thought it was obvious that I really, really liked you.”

That certainly catches Rei off guard, and he raises an eyebrow. “But why did I have to be the one to confess? That’s not fair. Imagine the grief you could have saved me!”

Nagisa laughs, then, his bright eyes crinkling with it, the sunlight catching him just right. Rei stops walking just to stare.

“I guess you have a point,” Nagisa giggles. “But look at it this way, Rei-chan! An ending is just another beginning. Who knows how things would have turned out if we hadn’t waited this long? I mean, maybe I wouldn’t have had to jerk off in the locker room shower so much–”

“Nagisa-kun!!”

Nagisa grins wickedly and wiggles his eyebrows, Rei’s cheeks turning bright red. “But, things are okay like this, too, aren’t they? Next semester I’ll be transferring, and we’ll be living together, too. Aren’t you excited for what the future will bring?”

“… I am,” Rei replies, genuine, a soft smile curving his lips. Rei used to be terrified of change, but sometimes, Nagisa can be perceptive in ways that Rei isn’t. Nagisa and the others have taught him that more often than not, change is a good thing.

—

Mithos is kind and caring and sweet. Mithos’ smile is gentle and fond, and his eyes crinkle when he laughs at Genis’ lame jokes. Mithos is the only person besides his sister who really, truly understands him, understands just how much he hates humans sometimes. He didn’t ask to be born this way, he didn’t ask to be different, but Mithos understands. Mithos holds his hand, and leans into his shoulder, and Mithos understands.

—

Mithos is not Yggdrasill.

—

Mithos lies in the grass with him at Altessa’s when everyone else is asleep inside. Mithos runs his hands through Genis’ long hair as Genis rests his head in his lap, drifting in and out of consciousness. Mithos tells him stories - stories about the great hero Mithos, stories from thousands of years ago, stories that have been long lost in the dusty pages of books too thick even for Genis. Stories about a Mithos that isn’t his Mithos. Like Raine said - Mithos is a common name. That’s all it is.

—

Mithos is not Yggdrasill.

—

Mithos kisses him when Lloyd and the others aren’t looking, soft and chaste and brief. Nothing more than fleeting, but Genis is red to the tips of his ears every single time, stuttering like an idiot until Mithos kisses him again just to keep him quiet. And every single time, Mithos’ smile afterward is the prettiest thing Genis has ever seen. Every single time.

—

Mithos is not Yggdrasill.

—

“Mithos… We’re friends, right?”

“… What? Of course. What are you talking about?”

“We’re really friends, right?”

“Y… yeah…”

“I believe you, okay?”

“…”

—

Mithos is not Yggdrasill.

Mithos is dead.