#harleyneedsanap

oh my god i used to have such a crush on him and then years later i found out he turns into like a HARPY and in the big crossover rp with my bf Chao turns into a sort of birdperson too so IT CHECKS OUT!!!! DEAR GOD THE CURSED SHIPS ARE GAINING FEASIBILITY 

Hi, @harleyneedsanap!  That can be a tough position to be in.  Before I lived where I live now, I lived in a red state with a lot of oppressive laws.  I was able to find little pockets of queer people, although I didn’t have a qpp then.  Even the most closed-minded state can have little pockets of resistance, of people like you.  I know you feel really alone, but I also know you can’t be the only acearo person in your state.

There are a couple things you could do.  One is to try to find IRL connections with other people from the LGBTQIA+ community, through volunteer work, community organizations, Pride celebrations, etc.  Getting out there in the physical world can be difficult, though, especially if you’re rural, disabled, introverted, etc.

Another thing you could do is try MeetUp, Bumble, or some other friendship kind of app/site and put on there that you’re looking for a deep, uncommon kind of friendship.  You don’t necessarily have to use the term queerplatonic (which can be tough to explain and might confuse someone who wants the essence of a qpr but just doesn’t understand the term).  You could even try surface-level friendships to see what might grow from them.

That last thing is what I’m trying now.  I’m desperately lonely (despite living in a liberal state and having a spouse), and I want to find the right qpp so very badly.  I’m trying some online-but-local options to at least find people to have coffee/tea with, in the hopes that maybe it could turn into something more.

It’s okay to approach it with the same kind of determination as dating.  It can take a lonnnng time and a lot of horrible dates/interactions before you find the person--or people! poly-friendly here!--that you want to share your life with in a romantic and/or sexual sense, and qprs are no exception.  I know that’s not exactly comforting in the short-term, but I know it’s worth the time and attention in the long-term to find what you’re seeking.

If I had money and the coding skill, I’d create an app for us to find qpps, but since I have neither, I’m sending you really warm, encouraging thoughts.

Lan Zhan is my biggest fan and all is right in the world. But also

This looks like I’m giving him a flower. Thank you for making this all come together so wonderfully.

🐷 - junk food you can never get enough of

EASILY chocolate. cadbury milk chocolate is probably my favourite but especially the buttons and the fingers. also flake bars. also milkybars which i could eat ten of. english chocolate is so good. yet another reason i literally just am remus

👻 - do you believe in ghosts