#hardquestions

MORNING THOUGHTS:

I'm going to ask you something heavy and you don't have to answer out loud...

How much do you really love yourself? No really, aside from the physical shiit, how much are you supportive of your cells (yourself, in other words) and your spirit?

Medical Moms/Special Needs Parents/Siblings/Family/etc., this question is especially for you:

If you had the condition your family member, son, daughter, etc. had, would you still love and treat yourself, more or less, or would you feel angry and neglect yourself, more or less? Would you ACCEPT yourself the same or would it be different? Would you not have the same spirit, if you lost your ability to express yourself, or be independent, if that's what you're used to, or would you find contentment? (just an example of the severity I'm referencing)

There's no wrong answer here. There is no shame in talking about this either. This is some heavy stuff.

The reason I'm asking, is because I had this thought, that if I were any different, physically or mentally, lost a leg or arm, an eye, my vision, my hearing, my intellect or cognitive ability, I'd still try to learn to love and accept myself

.....and if you really think about it, there are some health conditions that cannot be healed or aided, so in some cases, I'd have no other choice😶

That is so hard to think about, isn't it?

That's why I asked the question.

....because a lot of folks dont think outside their comfort zone. It's hard to imagine, right? But it can happen. It's the realest question you might ask yourself, with all the privilege you might have.

There are still plenty of parents and/or family who have a hard time accepting these type of situations. I like to reiterate the "what if it were you?" question.

If it were you, and your life was born with a special condition, that was out of your control, would you still do what you could, in order to live your best life?? Because as a human being, did you know it's your nature to do so?! How lovely is it that it is nature way to love ourselves unconditionally, in order to survive and thrive in this life.

I know for a fact that's all my little Zaza is trying to do, if I don't know anything else.

Person: “What do you study?”

Me: “Film.”

Person: “Oh, that’s so cool! That seems like a really fun thing to study.”

“So what’s your favourite film?”

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The amount of times I’ve been asked this question...

I never have the right answer either. It’s such a personal question now because what they really want to know is, “who are you” ... “what is your vibe” ... “what kind of films is this girl going to make” ... “who do you want to be”.

The pressure is insane. I’ve gotten so used to being asked this question after people find out what I study, that I come to expect it now. My body tenses up, I take in a deep breath, ready to start answering before they’ve even asked.

My answer is always "I don't have one but here are some of my top ones I really enjoy..." or, to be honest, I feel as though I'm more of a TV show kind of person. So sometimes I'll tell them that and give them my top TV shows. But I always feel like I'm under a big microscope because it's become way more of an important question since I started studying film at university. My answer actually matters more than for just conversation.

If they don’t ask that question after finding out what I study, the only other alternative I’ve found, is for them to ask: