#handong fluff

Handong. The belle of the ball. The prettiest girl you've ever seen.

Their ex.

Your partner's, to be more specific.

You didn't know why you were so obsessed with her - was it her perfect smile? her stunning sense of style? the way she effortlessly pulled any and all attention her way?

You shouldn't think of Handong this way - you have a partner. But it's normal to feel jealous about someone who once slept on the same of side of your partner's bed.

You need to get a grip.

~

Handong mingles effortlessly as she glides through the party. People part to make way for her as if she's Moses crossing the red sea.

You grab onto your partner's arm as they chatter with the person next to them. They pay you no mind as Handong approaches the two of you.

"You look great." She says to you in passing before heading to another room.

You wonder what you'd have to do to be like her. What diet you'd have to go on, how many exercise would you have to do?

You're upset over nothing - Handong and your partner haven't talked in months.

Cheap vodka ought to knock some sense into you - at least for tonight.

~

You can't explain the knot in your chest every time look at them.

They're supposed to be the one you love, but why do you feel so... lonely every time you're with them?

You can't blame Handong for your relationship 7 it's between you two, and you should solve it by yourselves.

You should take a step back, take some time to think about what you're going to do.

You send the break-up text without a second thought.

~

You thought you were jealous of her. She was utter perfection - you were much less than a fleeting thought.

You thought you were obsessed with her because Handong was your partner's ex.

Turns out, you were just plain obsessed with her. The prettiest girl who gave you a smile every time you crossed paths.

She made your heart flutter, made you feel something.

You shouldn't go to a party you know she'll be at, but you do.

You shouldn't drink to calm your nerves as you spot Handong in the crowd, but you do.

You shouldn't go up and ask her to dance with you for a while, but you do.

She shouldn't accept because exes of an ex aren't the most morally acceptable partners, but she does.

"I like you just the way you are," She shouts over the booming music as you dance together, "it's a damn shame that you and your partner didn't work out."

Handong should feel bad when her lips meet yours, but she doesn't.

Logistics hadn’t always been a big thought in your head, especially so in a world brimming with magic.

Still as the early morning sun crests the rolling hills, the thought peaks through like the warm tender reach of the sun. The morning dew melts and greets you with a frosty freshness.

“So are the cats just allowed anywhere in Hogwarts?” You brush through Kneazle fur, a happy crooned pur is your reward. You're surprised it's taken you until your fifth year to even ask the question. Though your studies had always held more of your attention than idle questions.

Professor Kim's eyebrows tighten together, there's the trace of a focused grumble. "Why the sudden question?" 

Your mind dances over morning in recent memories, the dulcet purr, awakening you every morning like the croaking cacaw of a rooster. 

Though admittingly Nannan was a far better wake up call. 

You'd struggle to recollect when he started spending his mornings and some of his nights with you. 

"Uh, just wondering," your lips purse, jostling with a potential lie. "Is it rude to become so friendly with someone else's cat without their knowledge?" 

"You and I, both know better than anyone that they aren't just pieces of property. They have their own thoughts and feelings, what they get up to is their own business… Unless it's trouble." 

She crinkles her nose with an almost knowing scowl, before her eyes peek over to you filling the trough idly. 

"How's the friend hunt going?" 

Your eyes dance over the familiar beasts, "I've made plenty."

Her eyebrows knit together, a questioning arc laces one stray brow. "We are talking about people right? Magical beasts are all well and good but socialising is something everyone needs, wizard and beast alike."

A tempered sigh leaves your breath, "People? None, nada zilch. I'm starting to think I'm cursed teach."

Rumours twist and circulate with a great swiftness around Hogwarts, rivalling the wing beat of the school’s owlery that’s for sure.

Though there was something to be said on the wizarding world’s reliance on one of the slowest birds in existence.

Perhaps there was something to do with magic? 

A thought for another day, as your feet pad across familiar concrete. The courtyard had been a familiar space of refuge for you.

A spot chosen by Nannan.

Still, as clouds crest through the sky, you’re surprised by his lack of appearance, it had been something of a regular occurrence since you started at Hogwarts.

You catch whispered words on the edge of the wind, “Did you see Handong this morning? She’s always gone before sun rise."

The quintessential ice queen, though that was an odd thought. She was far from studious, a remark commonly repeated by professor Kwon. You remember the frustration that boiled at the edge of his lips at her wasted talent.

Though you weren’t much for rumours having been caught in a few unfortunate ones in the past.

“I heard she’s been looking for Nannan, the little rascal disappears every night.”

A nervous gulp lines your throat, rumours already circulated you enough as it was, you didn’t need to add potential catnapper to the list.

You feel a nuzzling warmth burrow into your calf, a warm purr and you suddenly feel at ease.

Though something does feel off, as he hops on to a nearby bench without a notorious rattle.

His collar.

Did he have it this morning?

… Actually, now that you think about it, he seemed to have a bad habit of losing his collar, no doubt an additional stressor on the poor ice queen. Your brain bristles with the early nascent memory of when you first met.

The Hogwarts express, riddled with a deep seated anxiety. The wizarding world was so… foreign, magical and brilliant yet somehow antiquated. 

Blood purity was a weird hurdle you had to admit, being shunned like you had the plague was far from ideal. 

You remember leaving your carriage door open on the small, off chance that someone would join you. A friend to explore the newfound mysteries your life had been blessed with. 

Or cursed. 

You can still remember the rapid strum of tiny feet crossing the threshold, bounding into your lap with sudden glee. 

As well as a matching human sprint that you could almost mistake for an echo. 

The flurry of panic in her eyes remains seared into your mind to this day. 

"Nannan!" 

There's a kindle of surprise laced in her brow followed by a sigh of relief. 

"Sorry about him…" her hands grab at the small mound of fur, his claws dig deep into the fabric of your pants. "...He usually dislikes strangers."

A smile tugs across her lips, offering you a handshake. 

"Handong." 

Too bad nothing would bloom from that seed of a chance encounter. 

The sorting hat made sure of it. 

Still, you were thankful her gaze held none of the animosity of her peers, though her popularity made her more than a little unapproachable. 

"Did you lose your collar?" 

His head cocks to the side, surprised by the sudden question before looking down. 

There's a panicked flurry etched into his cute features. He always had a surprisingly human edge to him, though you suppose it was because he was a Wizarding family cat.

You were just glad that this one of the times he understood you, communication had been a bit hit or miss on the best of days. 

"Should we get you a new one from Hogsmeade?" 

A happy almost excited chirp blooms from his muzzle. 

Maybe, just maybe it'd help you start a more than middling conversation with Handong. 

Though, it did leave you with the difficult task of figuring out what to say, 'sorry I stole your cat' didn’t seem like a good start. 

"We're gonna have to walk since a broom wasn't in the budget this year," or any year really. 

There's always comfort to be had in the company of a friend, wizard and beast alike. The sun bristles with an even warmth, your eyes dancing across what little clouds you could see. 

Even as your school shoes dust through familiar trodden dirt paths and you lean back into the brace of your hands at the nape of your neck.

Relaxation was far from your mind. 

An eerie shadow floats and clings to your mind in spite of the open air freedom away from the castle grounds. 

"Do you think I'm cursed?" 

There's a warble tilted chirp of concern that bounces from his mouth. His paws stiffen against the dirt, drawing his small form to a halt, head clocked to the side expectantly. 

Almost like a question you can somehow understand, "cursed?"

Your teeth graze against your tongue, a bubble of vulnerability clogs your chest. There's a lingering hesitance that shallows your breath. 

To admit was to make real after all. 

"... I… I'm not sure if you noticed but I'm not exactly spoiled for company." the words boil past your lips, twisting with a fraction of frustration. Still, your eyes linger on your companion catching what you can only assume is a frown. "Not that you're bad company." 

There's an affirming almost knowing purr, the brush of his tail washes away some of the unease that weighs you down. 

Yet it always comes back. 

It’s hard to ignore the way the other students avoid even being on the same dirt path as you, even with Nannan in your company.

Almost like crossing your path would spell death for them.

Still the sun glitters and dances in the air, a small ray of positive energy. Your feet trail along the dirt path as your mind wonders. A soft welcome silence, a comfort even if the only companion you had was a cat.

Your ears twitch and hitch at the sound of someone rushing your way, in an almost eager fashion.

Two Slytherin students, you can’t help but groan… you’d hate to be bullied in Nannan’s presence. Your fingers grip at your wand hidden in your sleeve.

You were far from a proficient duelist, but at least it offered you a degree of comfort, no matter how small. However, your eyes catch an almost annoyed look in Nannan’s eyes, like a cat coming across a loveable if somewhat misguided dog. 

“Nannan!” An almost jovial burst of energy that mocked the very idea of the house of snakes, you catch the glint of a leather jacket hidden under her robes.

A muggle much like yourself.

Kim Yoohyeon, Muggle born Slytherin, Seeker and sweetheart of Slytherin’s duel captain Sly.

Her boots catch in the dirt, a betrayal of her own coordination as she teeters on the edge of tripping up.

A solid, firm hand catches her hood pulling her from the precipice. “I’m glad you’re nowhere near as clumsy on a broom.”

The voice is soft yet biting, a restrained well trained snake. There’s a cold calculation to her eyes and an almost permanently pressed frown on her lips. 

Olivia Hye, Beater prodigy and potions expert.

An odd duo for sure.

Yet their focus never even inches in your direction, too focused on your companion. Yoohyeon squats down before the furred joy of your life, a smile beams on her face as she tries to her pat Nannan.

Only to be met with air, as he suddenly darts closer to you, tail brushing at your shins.

Her eyebrows knit and tighten, a flash of surprise sparks across her face finally noticing your presence.

There's the bright flash of a smile, warm and welcoming much like your house should be. Yet her eyes remained focused on your companion like her prolonged stare could reveal answers long unheard. 

You clear your throat. 

"Oh right, sorry uh-" She quickly stands at full height, whipping out her hand from deep within her robes. "I'm Kim Yoohyeon and you are?-" 

You clasp her hand, "I'm-" 

Another flash of recognition as her eyes dart from you to Nannan and back to you. 

"You're the magical beasts muggle," there's a flare of a smile that burns with solidarity. Her grip tightens against yours like a familiar hug. 

"I, uh-yeah I guess that's me," you shrug, it was better than any of the alternatives by a long shot. 

"Otherwise known as the sore thumb Hufflepuff or…" Olivia prods, her eyes trailing you over, sizing you up. "The cursed student." 

You swear you catch a glint of a knowing look in her eyes, as she turns to Yoohyeon. A brief wordless exchange that you can't quite grasp. 

"I wouldn't worry about it though," Despite her dry almost uninterested tone, there's an ember of warmth that you can pluck out and huddle around. Her eyes shift back over Nannan. "Quality over quantity."

Yoohyeon's boots shuffle and shift against the dirt, her mouth opens but claws itself shut before she speaks. "We gotta go… But I wouldn't recommend heading to Hogsmeade. There's rumours of unsavoury folks hanging around…" 

Still, you can see the trepidation that gnaws at her lips, rolling and tossing with temptation. Like a child with a secret they shouldn’t tell.

Nannan’s buried meow in your calf reminds you of your mission. Still your hand creases against the back of your neck, a look of sheepishness. 

“Well, Nannan said we should be fine.”

Even in a world of magic your words manage to earn a look of surprise from both of them. 

“...Nannan,” Olivia points at the small cat, a curious jutted finger. “Told you that?”

“Unless there’s some other cat that sneaks into my ro-” your hand clasps over your mouth, as a frazzled meow echoes from Nannan. “-please don’t tell Handong, she’ll have my hide if she knew.”

Yoohyeon only chuckles as she places a hand on your shoulder, “your secret is safe with me muggle buddy.”

Olivia only rolls her eyes, “the ice queen isn’t that scary. She’s more bark than bite… outside of a duel at least.”

“But we should be off, I’d have for Sly to feel like a third wheel with Yoongi and Ryujin.” She muses boots scraping across the dirt.

“Right because it’s fine if I’m the fifth wheel.”

Your laughter hides, Nannan’s low growl.

It’s dark and cloudy when you finally make it to Hogsmeade, charged with a deep foreboding that only echoes with Yoohyeon’s warning. You’d never met a dark wizard before, and all things permitting it’d stay that way.

Yet the air holds its malicious charge, the streets emptier than you remember. Still you search in familiar nooks and alleys, ignoring the tension that boils in your stomach. 

Coloured roofs and windows blur together, each store isn’t quite right. You wanted Hnadong to understand that Nannan was safe in your care an-

You almost lose Nannan in your rush, a muffled, worried meow is all you catch as he rushes to your side.

Thinking too much as always.

You quickly crouch down to his height, your hands run through the side of his neck, ticking away at every sweet spot you remember as an apology.

“Sorry, buddy.” A frown tickles at your lips, “I-uh was getting stuck in my head as always.”

He nuzzles against your soft caress before propping himself up against your knees, cute beady eyes peering at your own.

His head tilts to the side.

A question.

“About?” Your lips scrunch together… you’re talking to a cat. Professor Kim would be simultaneously impressed and disappointed. “I… just want Handong, to know you’re safe with me.”

There’s a pause before he tilts his head the other way, almost like he didn’t believe that was all.

Your eyebrows knit together, did he see something you couldn’t? He holds your gaze for a second almost coaxing the thought out of you.

“...You’re right, I was hoping maybe we could become friends. Even if she is… less than approachable.”

The wind blows with a soft aching cold, yet Nannan looks at you for a moment before his gaze shifts side to side, almost patrolling for any passerby. You feel the soft patter of his feet against your knees before he launches himself at you, brushing his head against your cheek.

An affirmation that things would be alright, and a token of his affection.

“Love you too.”

He nuzzles into your palm with the heaviest purr you’ve ever heard from him. There’s a tickle of warmth in your chest.

Yet there’s something that gnaws at you, at the edges of your mind an almost unconscious instinct like something more was going on. Uneasiness settles back into your veins as your eyes linger on figures who weren’t there before.

Heavy black cloaks and hoods.

There’s a twinge in the back of your skull, a gut feeling, a hunch.

Poachers.

Their conversation is mostly muffled and hidden, but your eyes peer past their secrecy, a single word uttered yet unheard. 

But your eyes see true.

“Kneazle.”

The hairs on the backs of your neck prickle with tension, stiffen with fear. 

You grip your wand tight, gesturing for Nannan to run, your throat dry and parched as your heart races. Each thump burns deep in your ears even as Nannan looks at you with a surprised expression.

Your features flare with anger… you hated this approach, but time was of the essence. You could already imagine Taeyeon’s disappointed expression.

Perhaps she’d understand.

A deep seething breath, blisters past your lips as you raise your wand. Anger etched into every movement to scare him off.

Flickers of your loneliness, anger and pent up rage from years best unthought of. 

“Scram,” you scowl, voice dragging low with a growl. 

You catch the flash of surprised fear as he scampers off out of sight.

Perhaps you really were cursed?

Footsteps bounce and echo off cobblestone paths, yet you can barely hear them over the dangerously loud thump of your own racing heart.

What was your plan? You’d spent so much time worrying about a cat, that you forgot about yourself.

Your feet dart despite your heavy thoughts, moving on instinct alone as you tuck through alleyways and side streets. 

Their footfalls become rapid and heavy like a crashing wave, how long before it crashes into you?

A Slytherin would’ve had a plan to misdirect them and mock them, a Gryffindor would’ve been brave enough, strong enough to stand their ground like a valiant hero.

Your movements are desperate as you hear them claw closer. 

“We just want to talk Puffy~”

A Ravenclaw- 

Your feet stop dead in their tracks.

A Ravenclaw wouldn’t have ended up in a dead end, nothing but cobblestone walls. Your eyes search desperately for even a window to jump through.

Though would you even have the courage if there was one?

Your throat twists as you nervously gulp, dry with fear and exertion. 

A slow clap echoes through the abandoned and isolated back alley. “That was quite some detour Puffy.” 

Voice like hoarse, dry gravel. Like someone who smoked too much in hopes of being cool one day. 

An old weathered middle aged hand, peels back his hood. 

The leader no doubt.

Scars line his lips, a misshapen moustache that looked proudly groomed despite the gaps of scarred flesh.

Yet the glint in his eyes was animalistic, primal even.

Slowly you back away, you were nothing but prey in his eyes. A chuckle lines his lips, twisting with a malicious grin.

“Cat got your tongue?”

There’s a roar of laughter behind him, though you feel like it was more fear than genuine laughter. 

Your hand tries to grip tight against your wand, as your heart thumps louder and deeper. You can’t make out the words he says, they’re muffled by your fear.

Yet, one thing peaks through the deafening anxiety of your heart. The clatter of your own wand against cobblestone. 

If you were a real Hufflepuff perhaps, you would have someone to help you, save you from your grim predicament.

“So where’s the kneazle Puffy?” he lingers close, closer than you’d like. His breath reeked of stenches you had never encountered even with your care of magical creatures. A unique blend of sour and rotten, much like his soul you predict.

You have to fight against your own throat to speak, a lump held heavy in your throat boiling with the anxiety in your heart.

“H-he’s a half kneazle,” you point out, voice quivering despite your best intentions. 

His voice echoes yours, heavy with a mocking tone, a performance for his pack, “H-he’s a h-half k-kneazle.”

A flick of his wand, bludgeons the cobblestone underneath your feet, spraying dirt and pebbles everywhere as you slip.

“I could barely understand you with how much you were shaking,” he growls a twisted malicious smile etched into his teeth. He paces slowly as his eyes hover over you.

You were nothing but prey.

But at least Nannan had gotten away.

Yet his eyebrows knit together, a sound on the wind. 

A low growl.

“Perhaps your efforts were for not Puff-” His voice catches in his throat like he 'd been struck by an arrow.

A flash of fear burns deep into his visage, as his eyes twist over the rooftops. His voice catches in his throat, stuttering like a stuck record.

Yet there’s a part of you that roils with joy at the way fear gripped his face suddenly almost like a demento-that would be worse news for you.

“Miss H-Han,” his voice croaks as he slowly stumbles back. 

You hear the shuffle of rooftop tiles as a shadow flutters over you. There’s an almost feline grace as she lands, the air around her dances at her command. Her robes flutter with a familiar green and black.

You hear it, the dry scratch of his throat as he begs for his brain to work as it stumbles in her presence.

You slowly pull yourself up, your body almost commanding you to pull yourself together in her presence. 

It’s hard to believe she was the same girl you met on the train in your first year. The deep thud of your heart is absent in her company.

You feel it, before you see it, the flare of anger in the flick of her wand. The familiar flare of scarlet energy as concussive force leaves her wand, it screeches through the air with a howling scream before hitting the man square in the chest.

Even from here, you could hear the wind leave his body. 

His earlier display of power, mere child’s play compared to Handong.

“I believe I told you and father that I would find Nannan,” You catch the flare of white across her knuckles, her voice dripping with an icy calm. 

But you could feel the anger that boiled and simmered underneath, she paced slowly much like he had. Each footstep held with gritted teeth, the flare of a scowl.

“Please, take your leave. I do not wish for my companion to see an unsavoury side of me,” her eyes flick over to you with the flash of an apologetic smile. They quickly move with a shuffled panic before her gaze can even return to them.

You can’t help but feel the incessant need to tidy up your uniform, to straighten up, to stand talle-She hesitates in those quiet moments, eyes darting between you and the exit.

“I-uh,” she frowns against her own thoughts, fingers massaging her temples. 

You’re just glad you’re able to breathe by comparison. 

“Thanks.”

There’s the briefest flash of surprise across her features, replaced with a charming well practised smile. 

She’d make a good head girl.

“You’re welcome…” still there’s that familiar frown that tugs with thoughts. Her features tighten ever so slightly, a war between herself. 

It’s weird the way words just bubble naturally past your lips, “A friend of mine would tell you, you’d feel better if you just let it out.”

At least that’s what you think he’d say.

Her mouth opens, ajar for a second longer than you’d expected… Maybe you weren’t the only one who wasn’t good at the whole social thing?

Maybe, despite what had occurred, it was your lucky day?

“That’s not fair,” she whines, her nose scrunching with the quirk of a smile. A playful smack of her hand against your shoulder.

Your heart races at the contact, your panics at the thought.

Don’t think too much of it, don’t think too much of it, don’t think too much of-

A cackle of electricity ripples in your veins, as she dusts you off. Her smile does nothing to hide the worry that lingers in her eyes. 

Her grip tightens against your sleeves, holding you there in place.

“I… I should apologise, this was all my fault-” it’s hard to behold her so close, the way worry dances through her eyes melts the image of an ice queen with a searing flame. Sure, she had a certain regalness to her, but there was nothing close to ice.

Only a soft warmth.

“It’s alright, really-” you add, yet there’s a weird almost anxious edge to her as she babbles, eyes failing to meet yours. 

At least Nannan would be proud of you? 

This was going far better than you’d expected… Wait, where was he?

You purse your lips to whistle out to your companion. You owed him an apology. 

You hear a deep sigh from Handong, the echoes of desperate courage. 

“Promise me, these events won’t make you judge me too harshly,” her eyes peer into yours with reinforced vigour. 

You hear the slight jingle of a bell. “Why would I?”

Her eyes clamp shut with a grimace, “because… I may be the source of your other… this is all-”

You feel the brush of familiar warmth against your calf, a soft grizzly purr. 

“I didn’t realise they were talking about my father’s men,” she groans, her foot stomping softly against the footpath.

“Wait who were talking about your father’s men?” your eyebrows knitting together, were you having two separate conversations?

You feel her hands grip your shoulders, her head tilting to the side.

“Yoohyeon and Olivia?” she points out, eyebrows twisted and tangled much like yours.

“When did-” her head tilts to the other side, her mouth twists into a scoff like it’s the most obvious thing.

“On our way to Hogsm-” her voice catches in her throat, as she goes pale. A flash of panicked realisation. Her voice reduced to a quiet whisper. “...fuck.”

Of course.

It all clicks together with the greatest ease, Nannan had been more… affectionate after your third year. The clues had been there the whole time, the shifts in his personality, not being able to communicate with him sometimes. 

Losing his collar.

She shrinks under your gaze, eventually settling into an embarrassed crouch. You swear you can catch her whispers in the wind.

“This wasn’t supposed to go like this.” 

It’s automatic the way you crouch down in front of her. Your hand pats her head before you can even question if it’s weird or not.

Did she think you saw her change when she leapt off the roof?

She hums with your touch, before another flash of embarrassment catches in her throat. 

You probably weren’t helping. 

“I-... you probably think I’m weird?” Her voice curled into a soft whisper, a weak smile is all she can manage. 

There’s a desperate edge in the way her hand latches onto yours before you can pull it away. 

“Why would I think that?” Your voice bubbles and simmers with more warmth than you expected. Odd, maybe? But weird? No. “loneliness brings out the oddities in people.”

A weird mixture between a chuckle and a grumble dots her lips, her eyes lift to meet yours with a soft tentativeness. 

Each second, each interaction with her makes you question what others see in order to label her an ice queen.

Though perhaps it was her father’s company?

She tugs at you to sit down next to her, a soft plea for company in her vulnerability. 

You acquiesce, even with rough cobblestone to rest against. There comfort to be had in her company. 

Yet, her lips weigh heavy with troubles. You’d almost forgotten that she knew so much about you and yet… you knew next to nothing about her.

Her eyes avoid yours.

“It’s my fault everyone avoids you.” her words are blunt despite her soft cadence. There’s the soft release of a sigh that aches against your heart as she leans back. 

Your chest sputters with the mud of complexity that tugs at your heart. You feel the boil of anger underneath it all, yet something calls out to you, begs you to give her a chance.

The brush of a tail caresses your shoulder.

You hand slowly tugs and pulls at hers, squeezing into any gap, as she barely resists. Which earns you a soft, yet surprised look as she finally turns to you.

All you offer is a soft nod for her to continue.

You swear you can hear her heart rate jump, as her grip tightens against your own. 

“...I didn’t mean to.” a frown tightens against her lips, which only worses when your hand leaves hers. “But-”

There’s a quiver to her voice that you almost wouldn’t expect from anyone in Slytherin, especially her. 

You tug her closer to you, letting her rest nestled against your shoulder. You catch the slightest hitch of surprise in her breath, before nuzzling against your warmth.

“Everyone found out who my dad was and that I thought you were cute-”

You laugh, always with the surprises.  She turns to you with a scowl that borders on seriousness and playfulness.

Right, vulnerable moment and everything. “Dunno, what they’re on about. But he must be a scary guy.”

If he’s anything like her when she’s mad.

“So they star-”

“Spreading rumours, I get it. But was the animagus thing because you had a crush on me or because you felt sorry for me?”

She huffs, slightly before resigning herself. “A bit of both initially, it was Yoohyeon’s idea. She said it’d be cute like a fanfic… whatever those are.”

A chuckle bounces in your chest, that you barely fight back. “And you thought it’d be weird to approach me because of your reputation, let alone if you revealed that you were a stalker.”

A slight pang of pain is your just deserts, as she scowls slightly. “I am not a stalker.”

“Sure, sure.” A flicker of a smile licks at your lips. “Just because you’re pretty doesn’t stop you from being a stalker.”

Her palm caresses your cheek, there’s a tender softness to it. As if the moment would shatter like glass between her fingers. 

“I’m glad you’re okay even if it’s made things… weird.” The words sink and drag against you like an anchor, perhaps your heart mourns the loss of ignorance you once had. A frown lingers on her lips, tight and solemn. “But I’d prefer any of the possibilities were you hate me or think I’m weird, if it meant you were safe.”

Yet you can’t help but feel more lingering on her mind, a familiar feeling that hung in your chest whenever she trudged around solemnly as a cat.

Your palm massages her shoulder as your eyes drift skyward, the last embers of sunlight die with a whimper.

“And what would be the best possibility?”

She stiffens at the suggestions, pondering with a tense breath, “that you’d at least consider giving me a chance to be your friend.”

“Well,” you say, fingers tugging, pulling the two of you to your feet. “Friend, we might not make it back in time for dinner but the Three Broomsticks is close by.”

There’s the familiar flash of surprise, quickly swallowed by that ephemeral regal confidence you’d grown fond of.

“I’ll pay, it’s the least I can do.”

“Sweet, it’s a date,” you tease, a smirk creasing your lips as she rolls her eyes. 

You walk in silence, there’s warming comfort even with the gap in conversation. She’s always a couple steps ahead of, no doubt lost in her thoughts. 

You feel the swipe of a tail against your calf, the jingle of a bell and a simple soft meow.

A suggestion.

“Hey, one more thing,” you call out, jogging towards her.

“Wha-?” 

It’s simple and quick, a teasingly brief swipe of your lips against hers. While not exactly magical like being able to transform into an animal.

The gasp of surprise tickles your veins as you feel the briefest smile against your lips. 

It’s intoxicating in those brief moments before it’s gone, a couple of your fingers linked with hers as you drag her away.

It’s not often you meet your friends. So when you do, it seems unreal. 

You lost count of the hours you’ve spent at this bar, underneath the darkening sky and only warmed by candle fire. Having not finished even half the glass of wine, you were already losing focus, although you’d blame the company instead of the alcohol. 

That’s not to say the present company was bad. 

You couldn’t remember the last time you saw Gahyeon and Handong in person. 

Clashes with work and missed opportunities, struggling with large time zones and packed schedules, and mostly the fact that all three of you were scattered across the world. After spending every second with them during your college years, depending on them after every misfortune… it was strange to separate, to go different paths. To go from texting every day to failed attempts at video calls to quick updates every few months. 

It was isolating and disheartening. 

Yet here you are, in front of them, as if not a single second passed. Able to pick up right where you left off, many years' worth of conversations and secrets and anecdotes came flowing endlessly. It was as if a huge weight had been lifted, you couldn’t stop sharing or listening.

This is why you weren’t sure when you stopped paying attention to Gahyeon’s tale but instead focused on just soaking the pair in. Watching Handong’s little smirks before her gentle sips of wine when Gahyeon has to place her glass down to talk animatedly, eyes wide and gestures expressive. They were slightly turned to each other, all in their own little world. 

At the beginning of your friendship, you often found yourself far away from the two, unincluded in a moment such as this. The thought seems so ridiculous now, you had been so naive and insecure because at this moment, all you wanted was to observe them… just exist alongside them.

Body reacting to your thoughts, your hand was already in your pocket, searching for your phone. 

Like you’ve done a million times before, you opened the camera, switched off the flash, focused on the pair and caught them mid-conservation. As always, they will be none the wiser. You have so many more moments like these, of the two of them, none of which they are privy to because they’re for you to admire. 

You studied the picture on your phone when Gahyeon suddenly asked. “Is everything okay?” 

The moment those words were uttered your neck snapped up, worried that something was wrong. Instead, you found both Handong and Gahyeon sharing concerned looks trained on you. Glimpsing at your phone, a smile forms on your lips when you see the candid moment you captured; Gahyeon was grinning widely with her hand covering her mouth, while she shared a glass of red wine with Handong, who wore a similar warm smile. 

“Hmm, no, everything is fine—let me take photos!” In an instant, their concern was replaced by exaggerated groans, you chuckled while steadying your phone. 

“Do we have to?” Handong whined, although her actions seemed to disagree as she was straightening herself. 

Shaking your head, you waited for them to get ready. Or at least, you pretended to. 

Double-checking that the flash was turned off, you snapped multiple pictures of the pair, some with them fixing their hair, wine glasses placed on the table before being taken back, most with them deciding on how to pose. Would they complain your ears off if they found out that you took these pictures? Yes, absolutely, but again, these were for you to laugh at. 

“Are you guys done?” You asked with a sigh, but still lighthearted. 

Handong only rolled her eyes in response as she posed with her wine glass in hand, looking away from the camera, Gahyeon followed her. Then they placed their glasses down, deciding to lay on each other as they stared right at you through your phone screen. Gahyeon seemed like she was pouting while Handong had a soft smile. Even under the starless night sky with only candlelight to illuminate them and the grainy texture of the camera, they still managed to look beautiful. 

Just as you were about to lower your phone, the pair shifted again, grabbing their wine glasses and posing as if they were asked for a picture while drinking. Scoffing, you took one last picture before bringing your phone closer to examine the photos. 

“Send those to me right away, I want to post them,” Handong demanded before taking a sip of her wine. 

“Hey, are we not taking a photo with you in it as well?” Gahyeon asked. 

“Nah, my wine glass is in it, that's enough of me.” You said, grinning at the photos as you waited for them to deliver to Handong’s phone. 

Gahyeon mumbled something before fishing for her phone, making a clear display of taking photos of you—a better display would be that she was very tipsy. 

Pretty soon, the previous dynamic returned, and Gahyeon had begun telling her adventures again. Though this time, she was slightly turned towards you, mostly so you couldn’t catch her by surprise again. Handong had finished her glass of wine and had brought her legs to her chest so she could have her chin on her knees. She was wearing a proud smile, intently listening to Gahyeon while occasionally sharing knowing glances with you. 

It could be months or it could be years before another moment like this occurs. You could never really tell what might happen, so you decided to focus on the present. After taking one last look at Gahyeon and Handong’s very first picture of the night, you pocketed your phone and paid your full attention to them. 

any feedback is much appreciated.

Handong has her very defined style and tastes when it came to practically everything. The only exception she has given would be to your “acceptable” hoodies that she has stolen from your wardrobe that stood out very clearly from her own set of wardrobe she has kept over at your place that you have refused to touch. The tastes directly translates over to the way she held herself in public, and also over to the shows that she would like to watch whenever it was movie night. You’d usually just go along with her choices and sometimes you’d end up enjoying whatever your girlfriend would put on. In exchange, Handong would let you set the place up and pick up snacks for the both of you.

At the start of the relationship, it was rocky to get Handong to understand that although you were from two different worlds, you didn’t want your talented and rich girlfriend to just throw money into your life so you didn’t need to struggle your way up in life. You had stood firm that you wanted to live based off of your own efforts, and had threatened to leave if she wouldn’t understand it. It took a promise from you to her that if you really were to need help that you wouldn’t hesitate to seek her out first to work things out. You understood that she grew up and lived her life in luxury, but also understood her concern and care she directed towards you, although not so in the way you wanted to. It took a while for her to not be using her wealth and connections to make life easier for you, but she slowly grew to understand that what you needed was her to be by your side and her encouragement for you to walk on.

It had become a custom for you to have stay in movie nights with your girlfriend twice a month at least in exchange for the occasional dinner date where Handong would happily dress you up and swoop you to her favorite restaurants with names you probably can’t even pronounce properly or even heard of due to prices that would send you into a panic. You would have decisions over the movie dates other than the movie itself, and your girlfriend would have the decisions over your dinner dates. Cuddling up happily in a blanket cocoon, you weren’t exactly focused on what was on the screen, but rather letting yourself be amused by Handong’s reaction to the show. You had always told her that she could easily become anything she wanted to, including an actor or even a singer, but she had always insisted that inheriting her family’s business meant a lot to her. Of course the perks of having the family wealth running directly into her account was a plus, but from what she had told you one date night out on a rooftop dinner with a magnificent view of the rest of the city, it was way more than that. You could remember how much more you fell in love with her as she talked through the night and bared everything on her mind out to you. Handong might have been lucky and born into a rich family, but she had worked hard to proof herself to them. 

Your thoughts were cut short when the smile on Handong’s face dropped and there was just this sudden darkness that loomed across the both of you. Blinking blankly, your girlfriend looked down at you with a confused look before back up at the screen, and back down at you once again. “Is there a power trip?” Finally tearing your eyes away from your girlfriend, you took the time to observe around you.

Silently staring at the black screen, you suddenly could hear chatters coming around around the block which confused you. Lifting your head off of your girlfriend's shoulders, she sent you a pointed look at the confusion in your eyes. Scrambling up off the blanket and opening the warm cocoon, you quickly pressed a kiss to Handong's cheeks before explaining as you fast walked over to your fridge. "I don't hear the humming noise." Opening it up, you sighed when no light greeted you and pulled your phone out of your pocket to hope for the best. Shifting aside some bottled drinks, you placed your hand near the vent to feel no cool air emitting from it and groaned as you slammed shut the fridge door with a little more force than needed. A pair of curious eyes watched you the entire time as you made your way to your front door and opened it to take a peek out. What surprised you was that several other familiar faces also had their heads poking out their barely opened front doors as they confirmed their suspicions. When they noticed you, they gave a chuckle collectively. "You too?" Not waiting for you to give a reply, they shrugged and nudged towards the upper floors. "Seems like the whole building got hit. Hope you've got some candles at the ready. I have some extra if you need." Shaking your head and muttering a thanks, you closed the door and let out a long sigh. You knew that the apartment complex you lived in wasn't exactly the newest but to have the entire building be affected? That was something new. Looking behind you, you could easily spot your girlfriend sitting in the same spot with the rest of the blankets wrapped around her as the light from her phone illuminating her face. Taking a moment to admire her relaxed state, her eyes flicked over to you once she felt that you were staring and she gave you a small smile.

Dragging your steps over to the kitchen yet again, you use your phone’s light to search for the candles, getting more and more upset when your eyes drifted over to your fridge now that there is no more power running through the place. On a particularly loud slam of a cabinet, you could hear footsteps pad their way over to you before you got swallowed into a back hug by a blanket covered Handong. “I just got my groceries barely two days ago...” You whined to your girlfriend as she gently rocked you in her arms and gave you soft pats wherever she could reach with her blanket covered paw like hands. Slowly relaxing in her arms, you sighed once again and resumed your search for candles that you were gifted for some occasions that you don’t remember. When you finally found it, you waddled the both of you back to the living room after grabbing a box of matchsticks along with you. Settling Handong down onto the couch before placing the cup of candle on the coffee table, after struggling to separate yourself from her arms wrapped tightly around you, you light the candle and slowly retreated yourself to join your pouting girlfriend reaching her hands out making grabby actions at you under the blankets, letting the cheap lavender scent waft around the space and lowly illuminating the room in a soft glow.

In the dim lighting, you silently admired the way that Handong’s beauty seemed to shine through even more, as she traced patterns onto your back and stare back at you lazily. Guilt slowly washed over you when you realized that your date was technically ruined, and you tore your eyes away from hers to stare at the flickering flame. You suppose that being together with someone long enough eventually grants you the ability to read minds, or that if you are Handong, you automatically have the ability and much more as her arms tighten their hold around you. “Don’t. It’s not your fault.” Huffing as she shifted you further up on her so you could fit your head nicely into the crook of her neck.

"I prefer cuddling you than watching a movie anyways." Relaxing slightly more at those words, you snuggled into the warmth of your girlfriend as she continued to rub soothingly down your back.

Time probably flew by as the two of you stayed in one another’s arms, but you were too cozy to move. The rational part of your head and Handong’s eventual whining when you started to shift about knew you should probably move into the bedroom before the both of you accidentally fall asleep and wake up with aches everywhere, leading to Handong probably pushing to buy you a new bed couch she has been eyeing for your living room so reluctantly with a sigh, you separated yourself from your pouting girlfriend. Bending to blow out the candle, you jolt back upright in shock when you felt a smack on your bottom and turned to look accusingly at her while she looked away and pretended to look elsewhere. Growling lowly, you thrusted your hands under Handong’s back and under her knees and with a grunt, you lifted her up into your arms as she screeched slightly at your antics.

Dumping your girlfriend on the bed, she playfully scowled at you before you flopped yourself onto her still cocooned self and she let out a groan to complain about how heavy you were before wiggling her arms out and pulling you to her side and giving you a soft kiss. Although the both of you were tired, you were still willing to play wrestle for a short bit before allowing for Handong to cuddle you from behind. Sleep was very quickly overtaking your senses but just as you were about to completely doze off, you heard Handong say something. Pushing aside the drowsiness, you turned your head slowly to look at her.

“What did you say?”

"Move in with me."

Blinking away the sleep, you turned to face your girlfriend and took a few more moment to process what she had just said. "What?"

You suppressed a groan as you glanced at your phone. Why was it that your body insisted on waking up this early, before the sun was fully up? You glanced outside at the dark blue of the sky, getting brighter little by little and you sighed. It was bound to be chilly out this time of year and you were tired but you couldn’t sleep.

You rolled out of the bed and shuffled around, throwing on something warm and glancing back at the warm, comfy bed where your friend was still fast asleep. At least she was getting some rest. You would rather be in her place, especially when you knew this would just make you tired for the concert later tonight.

But as you slipped on your shoes you knew you couldn’t help it. You were restless and your mind was stuck on the idea of taking a walk.

The air was as crisp as you expected it to be, though at least the sky was clear. You stuffed your hands in your pockets as you wandered down the sidewalk towards the water. A starbucks caught your eye and you dipped inside, away from the chill for a moment. The hot coffee that ended up in your hand warmed you from the inside out, seeming to thaw you a bit when you headed back out into the morning.

Your feet carried you towards the water and you didn’t mind. It was something to do and you could rest when you got back to the airbnb, maybe then sufficiently tired to sleep, though the coffee in your hand might have ended up proving otherwise.

You were rarely up this early and though it was quiet, the city didn’t seem to sleep. Cars still whizzed past, maybe on their way to work, maybe on their way home. Taxi cabs sat along the street near the park, idling and waiting for someone to need a ride.

You headed into the quiet park, a jogger passing you, a man out with his dog. A small smile tugged at your lips as you took in the sun starting to peek over the horizon and you found a comfy spot along the railing to watch it. When was the last time you had been awake to see the sun come up? When was the last time you had stopped to watch it?

Something in the moment felt so right, as if it was almost picture perfect. But a strange feeling stirred in your stomach, like something was missing from it all. You’d been feeling that more and more recently, just a thought in the back of your mind, like something important wasn’t there. You tried to ignore it most days but now you were pondering it as the sun inched its way up, little by little showing itself.

Footsteps came closer to you, someone else out for a morning walk. You listened absentmindedly as they moved in your direction, no doubt coming to look at the water as well. Out of the corner of your eye you noticed someone lean on the railing a little ways away from you, sighing contentedly as she gazed out at the same sight you did.

The sun climbed slowly and it drew a smile across your face as yellows and oranges faded to purples and pinks across the horizon, the sky getting brighter bit by bit. The sight was truly stunning and you heard the woman next to you let out a small gasp.

“It’s beautiful,” the words slipped past your lips before you even realized as if drawn from you. You felt heat rise to the surface of your skin in the cold morning as you clamped your mouth shut, hoping she would ignore your intrusion on the quiet moment.

“It is,” she spoke with an accent and it was then that you finally looked at her and felt the gasp leave your lips.

It was early, maybe you were still in bed, dreaming. Maybe Handong wasn’t standing in front of you. That would be more likely. Though you supposed if she was going to be out the day of the concert, it would be earlier in the day, in the morning before she had to be anywhere. And somehow out of everywhere in this city, you had both ended up here.

“Hi,” your tired brain struggled for words as you processed this information.

“Hi,” she giggled.

“I’m a fan,” you mumbled.

“Ahh,” a smile broke across her face as she processed your words. Her happy energy was infectious and it had you smiling just as easily. She stepped a little closer and you tried to do the same but found yourself caught on the railing.

Handong let out a soft “oh” as she spied the problem while you tugged at your jacket. She moved closer and reached for the caught part of your clothes, fingers brushing over yours as she did so.

Both of you froze.

A strange feeling rushed through you, one you couldn’t explain. You felt warmer, more comforted in an instant. Your gaze shifted to meet hers and strong emotions overtook you, a lump forming in your throat and eyes welling with tears as you tried to make sense of the sudden feelings, realizing she was growing teary as well.

“Are you okay?” she sniffled.

You nodded quickly as she stood properly. “Are you?”

She let out a nervous giggle that made your heart flutter and you clasped your hands in front of you, trying to steady yourself and stop them from shaking.

“Oh, you’re…” Handong shook her hands and pointed to yours and you looked down at them, letting out a quiet chuckle at it all, your brain still preoccupied with wrapping your head around it, your brain still sleepy. Her hand’s wrapped around yours gently and your gaze snapped up to meet her.

There were no words to explain the feeling that overcame you. Like a rush of nostalgia. You looked at her as if you had known her all your life, you felt like you must have. Something inside of you snapped and tears started to stream down your face at what felt so strongly like a reunion you couldn’t explain. Handong squeezed your hands in a way she had done a thousand times before and you threw your arms around her, engulfing her in a tight hug as she did the same to you.

“I missed you,” her voice was weak from crying as she spoke.

“I missed you, too.” you hummed, sure you never wanted to let her go again.

You didn’t think too hard about the butterflies in your stomach as you bowed in the presence of the princess. You had met royalty before. You had been surrounded by nobility your entire life. This was nothing new, to meet the princess, to work with her, to show poise and grace and be honorable was nothing new.

Even if the butterflies were.

Like a breeze, gently caressing a meadow of flowers.

“You don’t need to fuss so much,” Han Dong chuckled. “Or be so stiff.”

“I’m sorry, your majesty,” you said quietly, bowing your head and taking a seat in the corner of the room. Something about her made you so nervous, much more than you had ever felt around any other nobility. Even after a few days of working for her and waiting on her you hadn’t managed to shake the feeling much at all.

“I like to relax when I’m in private,” she said quietly. “But I can sense your nerves, you’re too rigid.”

“I’ll try to be more… relaxed,” you replied uneasily, shifting where you sat. You weren’t so used to this kind of treatment. You were used to being more proper while you worked, though you supposed you were the same age, maybe it was uncomfortable for her if you were so stiff?

“I think it would be nice to be more like friends.”

You looked at her with surprise. “Friends?!”

You regretted your tone immediately, mentally kicking yourself. You knew better than to speak like that while working. Han Dong seemed unphased by it though, merely gazing at you kindly, slightly curious.

“Have you never been friends with someone you work for before?”

“It’s… not my place.” You replied quietly. “Though I’m never so close in age with them.”

Han Dong sighed, her gaze shifting to look out to the grounds. “Well I think I’d rather like to have a friend.”

Like a leaf falling gracefully into an autumn pond, causing ripples.

You ran the comb gently through Han Dong’s hair. You liked when there was a lot of time to get ready. You could take a little longer than you needed brushing out her hair. Your fingers could linger a little longer on her face as you did her make-up. It was nice, time spent with just the two of you.

It had become so comfortable between you, that was what you attributed it to. It was nice that you got along, that you enjoyed each other’s company. Doing her hair was so calming. Some days you quietly chatted. Some days she read poetry out loud so you could hear it too, liking the way the words sounded as they fell from her lips. Some days you sat in comfortable silence, just enjoying each other’s company.

You had grown very fond of her. Han Dong made you feel warm and comfortable. Something about you felt so drawn to her, and connected to her. Perhaps it was the fact that you were so close in age with her, you had found a friendship with her and that was something wonderful. It made your work so enjoyable, being with her, being around her.

You moved in front of Han Dong, her eyes closed as you gently tilted her face up and started to do her make-up. A smile turned the corners of her lips upwards and her eyes fluttered open. The way she gazed at you made your heart skip a beat, close as you were to her. Your hands stilled as you processed the feeling, butterflies erupting in your stomach.

“Are you alright?” she asked.

“Of course,” you tried to wave off the feeling as you began to work again. “I suppose I’m just a little tired.”

She frowned. “Do you want me to let you off earlier tonight-”

“No!” you winced internally at the surprise on her face. “M-My apologies I just, I have no issue with working. It’s me, I just wasn’t sleeping well.”

“Take care of yourself,” she hummed, letting her eyes fall closed again.

“Y-Yes,” you replied quietly, swallowing back your pesky feelings. “I’ll try.”

Ripples through time.

“She’s their next royal consort, I heard the marriage is already arranged.”

You never did like the whispers of the others who worked in the palace.

“He’s spineless, she’ll be the one to hold the power.”

These seemed particularly distasteful.

“Either way, it’s a good marriage. A smart match.”

“She must be excited for such an opportunity.”

You did your best to keep the grimace off your face. You didn’t like these rumours, this palace chatter. Han Dong would have told you by now if she was getting married. You knew she wasn’t all that excited over the idea in the first place so surely she would have been distraught over being married off to some prince in some kingdom to secure some political alliance.

You did your best to quell the slow burning anger inside you as you made your way to her chambers. She was, at the very least, in a quieter part of the palace. It was more relaxed, less people with prying eyes and involved in idle chatter about who was allegedly marrying who. You didn’t need any of that. You would rather hear from Han Dong why these rumours were flying around the palace.

You sighed, this is what you got for needing one simple day away, you come back to the palace in a tizzy.

You still had the good sense to knock, Han Dong calling you in softly like she always did. You couldn't help your smile when you saw her. Something about her presence was so serene and calming now. It put you at ease to be around her these days and that feeling could at times be a rare one. There was something so comforting about her quiet, composed presence.

“Shall I help you get ready?” You kept your voice steady, holding back the questions you really wanted to ask. Han Dong hummed and moved around her room until she was sat, ready for you to do your hair. You took your time, too quiet as you tried to figure out how to say what you wanted to and she beat you to it.

“You’re quiet today. You’re only this quiet when something’s wrong.”

“I’m just-”

“Tell me the truth,” she said plainly. “I want to know what’s happening. And I know that tone, when you want to spare my feelings.”

“Are you getting married?” The words left your lips, drawn by her request.

Han Dong stiffened and your heart dropped. “You heard…”

“I did,” you said simply, not wanting to give too much away, maintaining your composure.

“It wasn’t my first choice truthfully… But it’s the best one.”

“I see.”

“I know you’re upset.”

You sighed. “This just, doesn’t seem like something you want.”

Han Dong laughed and you caught her eye. “My life is not about what I want. If it was, it would look very different.”

“What would it look like?” You thought that question was too much the moment it left your lips.

She shook her head, her cheeks tinting the faintest pink. “There’s no use in thinking about that now. And besides, it never would have worked out.”

You dropped it, though you were burning with questions. “I suppose there will be a lot to move then.”

“I only have so much,” she said.

Your hands stilled. “But what about us? Don’t we have to move out belongings too? You have a number of personal servants.”

Han Dong shifted, not meeting your eye. “You’re in the employ of the palace and the family, not of me.”

“Han Dong…” your voice lost some of it’s steadiness as you processed her words.

“I have no say in the matter.”

“So you’re- you’re just going to leave?” Your heart was beyond your feet, as if ripped from your chest and torn to pieces.

“It’s not as if you won’t have a livelihood without me.” Her voice was annoyingly even.

“I won’t-” You stopped, searching for better words. “How could- This isn’t-”

“It’s done.” She said plainly. “I can’t do anything and neither can you. We have to live with it.”

“You can live with this?” You knew your voice sounded weak, a lump forming painfully in your throat.

“I have to. And so do you.”

Your hands shook, unable to truly wrap your mind around it, blinking back tears at the thought of it. “Will I ever see you again?” The emotion in your voice was too evident and Han Dong bristled.

“If you can’t work, you can go.”

You pulled you arms around yourself, more hurt by her words, her apparent lack of care than anything else. How could she be so calm, even with you? How could she be so unaffected when your very being was shattering.

“If you’re going, then go,” her voice was too harsh, and maybe a calmer you would have heard what she was masking.

“Yes, your majesty.”