#gwccat

Hey guys! NAHS will be showing JURASSIC PARK this Friday (May 29th) from 6-9PM!

As usual, tickets are $5 and there will be food and a costume contest.

cook: chances he will knock you out = 95%. yeah he’s probably a lot older than you so you might think you can beat him, but the dude’s scary af and will probably intimidate you to death. be careful when fighting.

cypressi: chances he will knock you out = 200%. dude can make you cry with a glance. no matter how much you want to fight him (probably a lot), he’s got a fucking quadruple black belt and will definitely kick your ass. don’t fight cypressi.

ali: chances he will knock you out = 60%. i mean he made that film about karate and can probably do a few moves but he’s more likely to sass you to death. there’s a good chance you’ll get distracted by his face and he’ll win. 

afshari: chances he will knock you out = 30%. will probably try to confuse you by saying something deep and then yelling “the battle”. just make sure he doesn’t get ali to help him. please, please fight afshari.

shovlin: chances she will knock you out = 40%. i feel like she’s probably hiding some sick martial arts skills in all those weird jackets and scarves she wears. but seriously, why would you want to fight shovlin. what’s wrong with you. don’t fight art mom.

souvorva: chances she will knock you out = 80%. man she bikes to school she probably has crazy muscles. she’s also younger than everyone else which gives her an advantage. and if the fight involves spelling or pronouncing her name correctly just give up. try not to fight souvorva.