#guremika

Guren could feel eyes on him, heavy with suspicion.

“Will you ever trust me?” Guren knew the answer, of course. It didn’t matter how many times he did the right thing. To Mikaela, Guren would always be the man that used Yuu, the man who sacrificed the world for his own selfish reasons. He couldn’t blame the blond for his continued scrutiny.

Sharp red eyes scanned his face as he turned to face Mikaela.

“No.”

Guren hid the sting those words caused with a lazy smirk. He didn’t care what the other thought of him. He didn’t. Why would he?

“How cruel.” Guren said with a mocking tone. It was late, he was exhausted, and he had assumed everyone would have been tucked away in bed by now. Mikaela was the exception. He always was the exception.

“Where were you?” Mikaela is never shy to get to the point.

Guren sighed, dragging a hand over his face.

“What are you, my wife?” Guren chuckled. Mikaela’s lips twisted into a frown.

“If you’re up to something that will endanger--”

“Calm down, blondie.” Mikaela’s frown turns into a sneer. Guren took some delight in that. He always seemed to be able to rile the other up.

“I’m not stupid enough to try that again.”

“You aren’t stupid. That’s my concern.” Mikaela’s eyes looked haunting under the dim light of the moon.

“Oh, was that a compliment?” Guren said. Mikaela only grumbled something under his breath. Something rushed through Guren’s chest as he watched Mikaela take his turn to leave. Unsaid words clung in the cool air of the night. It was rare for either of them to be alone, let alone together.

“Hey.” Guren called out before Mikaela could leave. He expected the blond to ignore him, but Mikaela turned back toward him.

“Do you think we could ever get to a place where you’re not trying to kill me?” Guren kept a light tone, an easy smile on his lips.

Mikaela rolled his eyes, crossing his arms over his chest.

“I don’t want to kill you...anymore.” Mikaela replied with a slight upturn to his lips. It was gone in an instant. A barely-there grin.

“And, any more than that?” Guren doesn’t know why he felt so bold tonight. He watched as Mikaela’s expression wavered, haunting eyes abandoned him.

The silence stretched on, a long fog that washed over Guren.

“I…” Mikaela’s hair swayed in the breeze, golden strands covering half of his face.

“...maybe in another world?” Guren said as he looked up at the waning moon above them. He didn’t want to think about the possibilities. The what-might-have-been, or what-could-be. None of it mattered. For them, there was only one possible outcome.

Mikaela’s voice was uncharacteristically soft when he replied.

They’d had close calls before, but nothing as serious as this. 

Guren couldn’t quite look at the body that lay still in the medical bed. Tubes ran through the boy’s arms and face. The rhythmic beeping of machines only added to the eerie feel of the cold, dimmed room. 

Anger and concern warred inside of Guren’s mind. 

Mikaela had saved him, despite Guren’s protests and shouts. 

The image of Mikaela crumbling to the ground replayed itself over and over whenever Guren shut his eyes. 

…

Guren hardly slept. 

He visited Mikaela’s room every morning, ignoring the curious eyes of the nurse that alway found him there before she arrived. He didn’t stay long. He had things to plan, missions to complete, and recruits to whip into proper soldiers. 

He appreciated the distractions. 

“He’s a tough one.” Shinya said, patting Guren on the shoulder. 

Guren hummed in response.

…

Guren froze outside of Mikaela’s door when he heard voices through the wooden surface. 

He opened the door to find Mikaela sitting up, propped up against a few pillows. His entire squad was squeezed into the small room. All eyes fell on him. 

Guren cleared his throat, nodding in greeting at the other members of the squad. 

“Well...we’ll come back a little later, Mika. Wouldn’t want to wear you out too much.” Shinoa spoke first, grinning at the blond before pulling Mitsuba up from her own chair. 

“Don’t think just because you almost died, you’ll get out of cleaning duties when you come back.” Kimizuki said with a smirk which Mikaela returned with a weak glare of his own. 

“He’s just joking.” Yoichi added hastily, giving a nervous glance toward Guren. 

Before he could blink, the four scurried out of the room, leaving him and Mikaela alone. 

Guren sighed at their antics and moved to take a seat at the now vacant chair next to Mikaela’s bed. 

“How’re you feeling?” Guren asked as soon Mikaela’s eyes met his. 

“Better than I thought I would.” Mikaela replied with a confused scrunch of his eyebrows. 

“That would be the drugs.” Guren said, lip quirking into a half-smile. 

The image of Mikaela falling in front of him flashed through his mind, and his smile disappeared. 

“You shouldn’t have been so reckless, Mikaela.” 

A sigh left Mikaela. 

“Oh? So should I have just let you die?” Sarcasm laced each word. 

“Yes.” Without question.

Mikaela’s shock is palpable. Guren watched as Mikaela’s eyes looked him over, mouth twisted into a frown. 

He nearly flinched when a hand fell on his. He hadn’t even noticed when he’d rested his hands on top of Mikaela’s bed. 

“You don’t mean that.” Mikaela said, eyes turning fierce. 

Guren couldn’t respond. 

He was just a pawn, disposable and unimportant. Mikaela was much more than that, even if the blond didn’t know it yet. 

“Your life holds more worth than mine. You would do well to remember that.” Guren finally said after a moment, grasping Mikaela’s hand. It was soft and warm. 

“Bullshit.” Mikaela sneered. “Nobody likes a martyr, Guren.” 

Guren’s body moved on its own. He leaned forward, arms moving around Mikaela’s torso. He held the blond close, careful not to accidentally hurt him further. 

Mikaela rested his head against his chest, his own arms curling around Guren. 

Guren closed his eyes, the images of Mikaela falling slowly dissolving into nothing. 

“Thank you for saving me.” Guren whispered into the cool air.

He never wanted to let Mikaela go. The blond was too righteous, too loyal, too good. 

Guren was the selfish one. The one that wanted more than he could have. Greedy. 

He loses himself in Mikaela’s presence, his warmth, the life that still flows through his veins. 

It wasn’t until Mikaela mumbled something that Guren snapped out of it. He lets Mikaela go, leaning backwards until he just stands up. 

A soft blush colored Mikaela’s face.