#greylithromantic

[image description: four block text banners of the word “pride” in a squared-off text, coloured in five, six and three horizontally-striped pride flags. Identities: acemphatic / aroacem (orange/yellow/purple/light blue/navy), aroemphatic / aroemace (orange/yellow/light green/green/light blue/navy), greylithromantic (red/orange/yellow/white/grey/green) and nullumromantic (black/grey/green). Banners are shown in two versions: one on a black background with a white frame, the other with a transparent background.]

Aromantic Pride Block Text Banners

Flags: Acemphatic / Aroacem, Aroemphatic / Aroemace, Greylithromantic, Nullumromantic.

All banners/stickers are available for free personal or non-commercial use with credit to one of my accounts. They are not available for commercial use.

[image description: six different cartoon-style bunting graphics, featuring six pride flags hanging from a brown rope. The flags are rectangular, finishing in a chevron shape, and have rows of brown stitching across the top of the flag and along the bottom of the chevron. First image in each set shows the flags with the topmost stripes facing the left; second image shows the three right-hand flags flipped, so all topmost edges face away from the centre of the bunting. First set of flags shows the red/orange/yellow/white/grey/green greylithromantic flag, second set shows the black/grey/white/dark green/very dark green greyromantic flag, third set shows the grey/mint/blue/pink quoi-cupioromantic flag.]

Aro Bunting, No Text

Does anyone want to decorate their website for an aromantic-themed party?

i just wrote about it in the tags of a previous post but some of those tags got deleted because i tried putting too many feelings that i have towards my newly gained knowledge about myself into a way too small space. so here goes a lot i have to say about something a lot of you wont even care about but i feel like sharing.

the reason i had so much to say about the post is that i reblogged it from a blog dedicated to lithromance (is that the noun???) which helped me figure out my romantic orientation barely a few hours ago. 

so. 

heres the thing i’m heterosexual as far as i know and i get serious crushes (like fuck me (literally) they are so so so horribly painful) but the idea of a relationship kind of puts me off??? and i want to hold hands in more than a platonic way but not be in love?? and i want to have a special person who thinks im their special person but i cant imagine what love is like??? 

platonic love - yes. the idea of romantic love though? - no

confusing. revolting even in a weird way? and having someone tell me they like me (whether as friend family member (yes even then) or (potential) lover kind of emotionally pushes me away from them (in most cases) and im overwhelmed and cannot comprehend (in most cases). i say most because (this is important yalls) there are cases when it doesnt happen and i can happily admit i love someone (platonically). and still that romantic love (the concept the feelings the symptoms if u will) confuse me and i cannot understand them. 

the closest thing (i think) ive gotten to imagining it is the feeling i get in those kind of moments when i talk to a friend and they say something really meaningful and cute and im like THIS is why were friends or when they dont say anything at all and i just get this feeling of IM SO GLAD WE MET. those feelings mixed with the way i feel when ive been gone for longer than an hour and my dog greets me and my mom tells me shes proud of me and I AM PROUD OF MYSELF TOO and the feeling of spotting a really pretty flower and taking one of its blossoms to glue into my journal and being satisfied but not tired in bed listening to my favorite songs while its raining and the excitement of waking up to snow and looking in the mirror without questioning my appearance once and listening to someone talk about one of their passions with sparks in their eyes and a slight blush on their cheeks hands hoping to helpfully gesture the parts they cant put into words only to make them seem even more excited and seeing little kids play and smile and laugh and realizing that youre alive and youre well and youre happy

i can imagine and feel all these feelings but i cannot see them building up to something greater not to mention to something greater that is romance related. to me it doesnt make sense. and yet i want that something that i cant explain and fail to comprehend in a way that is so confusing. 

in the process of understanding myself and my orientation, i actually googled what love feels like to different people and some said it feels like christmas, which is an amazing example to explain myself a bit better.

i never liked christmas. i don't get the concept of it. it's weird. but people kept forcing it on me in a way, so i started hating it. i started hating family gatherings and being around people and even hugs (still dont 100% like those - working on it). but i dont actually dislike the idea of being with people. under circumstances that are neither forced nor fake or in any other way stressful, i love a bit of socializing. who doesnt like giving and receiving gifts? and good food and a bit of ornaments (i said A BIT, mom)? i just dont like the label "christmas" , as i associate confusion and discomfort with it, built on a strong foundation of indifference towards the name and most symbols associated with it. i'd happily celebrate a feast of (strong platonic) love with gifts in a mildly (I SAID MILDLY MOM) decorated room on any given day except the one that makes me feel all these weird things. give me a special day that has all that, but at the same time is nothing more than a special day. 

i'm grey-lith/akoi/apro-romantic and heterosexual, you guys.