Tags: fluff, periods, bleeding, feeling sick, period cramps, comfort food, massages, cuddles, working out, suggestive content
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A/N: If there was a button to opt me out of periods for the rest of my life I would press it so fast. It's not fair.
Jinx would run around frantically, literally burying you in supplies that she doesn't even know if you need. The type to try to distract you by talking your ear off and making you laugh. She feels guilty when she sees you cramping up in pain and briefly considers offering you Shimmer to make you feel better. If she needs to she will break into Piltover medicine shops to get you some better medicine.
Vi hasn't had the best experience with periods herself so she doesn't know how to take care of you properly. She offers you messages that worked with her when her cramps were really bad and makes sure you have enough water to drink since you're bleeding a lot. Kisses your stomach when she feels it flexing from cramps. When she feels you relax under her touch she smiles, knowing she's doing it right.
Caitlyn knows when your period is close so she takes days off work to tend to you. Piltover won't fall to pieces if she's not working for a bit, taking care of her girlfriend is more important. She can get you anything you need, be it medicine, pads, food you're craving, just ask her and she'll take care of it. Doesn't want you walking alone when you're feeling sick so she always follows you to the bathroom.
Maddie always makes sure she has your favorite comfort food ready for when you're on your period. It's a small comfort maybe but it's something she always wanted to have while she was on her periods, someone taking care of her. To make sure you don't get sick again she feeds you the food little by little. When a bit of food stains your lips she leans in to kiss you, distracting you for just a moment longer.
Grayson gets worried when she wakes up and you're not in bed next to her but in the bathroom holding your stomach. She knows what's wrong right away and carries you back to bed, telling you to stay put while she goes out to buy what you need. Helps you change into clean pajamas and kisses your legs, hips and stomach while doing so. Makes sure you get lots of rest, and lots of tea to help with the pain.
Sevika thinks that a good workout is a great way to help with your period pains. Obviously she won't push you past your breaking point or push you if you're feeling sick but a little work out will do you some good. She rewards you with food and drinks she knows you like, and those that keep your energy up so you're not as sluggish. Kisses are on the table too, and more if you're feeling up for it later.
Mel prepares you a big, warm bath and yes she will take the bath with you once you washed up. Pampers and spoils you rotten while you're on your period, she's even more attentive than usual. She makes sure you know that she doesn't think the blood is gross or unsightly, she might look prim and proper but she'd seen her fair share of blood. And she would never be grossed out by you, especially not now.
Ambessa lets you see her secret softer side when you're on your period. Her duties can wait a bit, she wants to spend a good chunk of her day with you instead. Physical activity is a good way to help with period pains and you already know she's not grossed out by blood in any way, so if you want to spend the day in bed with her it's more than welcome. Or you can just cuddle, that's on the table too.
Cassandra didn't have regular periods when she was younger but she knows how painful they can be. The last thing she wants is to see you in pain so she always has tea ready, it's right next to your bed, might not be tasty but it helps. She cuddles up next to you on the bed or on the couch, constantly kissing your cheeks, your forehead, kissing you on the lips, comforting you. Will even take a day off from the Council.
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Sevika or Grayson x fem reader who dolls up on the daily basis and feels insecure about their bare face
Bare Beauty
𝐒𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐤𝐚
You and Sevika been talking for a good while now—maybe a couple weeks or so—and she’s never seen you without your makeup off. Whenever she saw you, always dolled up with beautifully done makeup. Each and every time. It was a late night for you, chilling at home while watching some series that you’ve been binge watching for the last week and snacking on some of your favorite snacks.
While being in the comfort of your own place, you didn’t wear any makeup and just let yourself be. Mind you, you wanted to show Sevika the real you, but you weren’t just quite ready for that, so you just simply always dolled your face up when you two would go on dates and when you’re at home, that would come off—unless you would randomly do your makeup to take some photos to her whenever you both missed each other. Other than that, it was always makeup around her.
You say there in your couch with a blanket draped over you snuggly, face free from foundation, lipstick/lipgloss, mascara/false lashes, and highlighter. Your face had some blemishes since you’re human—you’re gonna have them regardless—and had little pimple patches across your cheek, forehead, and chin since your skin did NOT wanna cooperate. There were times you felt insecure about your bare face since you were used to the makeup, but even still, you couldn’t help it. Ignoring that gnawing gut in your stomach, you went back to watching your show until there was a knock on the door—thinking it was your doordash deliverer.
Happily getting up, you dashed over to the door, excited to be greeted with savory smell of your food—only to be met with Sevika looking at you, holding your doordash order in her hand. You nearly felt like crawling into a corner and dying. Your eyes widened as you took in her silver eyes peering into yours while also taking in your face, seeing that it was a rare sight to see you out of makeup. “Sevika…I didn’t know you were coming over today…”
“I know, but I decided to come anyway—by the way, your food was left on your doorstep.” She murmured lowly, nonchalantly at that as if you were just bare face right in front of her. She raised a brow at your bewildered expression, “what???” You shook your head out of your daze, crossing your arms as you just shrugged. “Nothing, I—don’t you see me without any makeup? I look hideous, Sev.”
She stared at you as if you were dumb before scoffing, sliding past you through the door and setting the bag of food on the coffee table before turning to you as you shut the door. “You don’t look ridiculous, love. I was wondering when I was gonna see ‘you’ out of all that stuff you were nearly wear 99% of the time we go somewhere.” You rolled your eyes at her snarky comment, earning a cocky smirk from her as she settled on the couch while pulling you close to her.
“Oh fuck off…i’m serious though, Sev. I literally have pimples big as tits on my face—i can barely cover them with my patches!”
“So? You don’t even look like shit without your makeup, love—I can assure you that you look absolutely perfect in my eyes…” Her arm wrapped around you waist as she flashed you a warm smile, seeing a peek of her tooth gap. She placed a warm kiss to your forehead before chuckling lowly, “yeah, maybe the patches aren’t doin you any justice, baby…”
“Sevika!”
𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐲𝐬𝐨𝐧
It was a peaceful night as you were winding down from the little outing you had earlier during the day. It was nice, of course, but you missed your wife dearly and would send her photos of you—all of which you had your face dolled with your usual makeup. Now, Grayson seen you a little of times with your makeup off, but not fully since you would try to do light makeup still. That was cut short when you started to notice pimple decorate your face—yeah, no more of that.
The house felt empty without Grayson since she was working late doing her respective duties as usual and you understood that, but that didn’t mean you couldn’t miss her. She’s your wife, so why would you not? You sat at your vanity while wiping off the leftover makeup, leaving you in a bare-pale-pimple covered face. You didn’t really like being bare faced, especially whenever you would be around Grayson.
Yeah, of course she always made sure to assure you that you were beautiful as the moon is in the sky countless of times, but you couldn’t grasp that. You slumped back in the chair as you sighed, leaning on your forehead before your ears picked up the sound of the door creaking open and heavy footsteps following to where you were. There she was, standing in all her glory, Grayson looked at you with a warm gaze, taking in the small frown etched on your lips.
“There’s my gorgeous wife…”
You couldn’t help but dry laugh at her, knowing she was just tryna boost your mood and also meant it as well. “Mhm, i’m everything but that right now, baby..” She rolled her eyes briefly as she stalked over to you, rubbing your shoulders as she placed a kiss to your cheek before finding her way to your lips—earning a hum of approval.
“Don’t be so down, love. You’re still precious in my eyes—makeup or not. Yes, you look gorgeous with your lovely makeup, but I also adore you without it. Wanna know why?”
“Why?”
“Because that’s who I really fell in love with on that faithful day when you were rushing out and bumped into me, panicking that you were running late and didn’t even have any makeup on..”
god this woman was your everything.
You turned to her with a small pout of adoration and thoughtfulness at her words, taking you back to the memory you first met. “Baby, you remembered..”
“How could I not remember the time I fell in love with my world?”
hope you enjoyed bbys!! (sorry if this lowkey cringey or corny and short!!☹️)
Grayson came home late, like about 2am, and assumed her wife was sleeping. She entered the house and found it quiet but there's a dim light in the kitchen. Thinking it's an intruder (because she knows her wife and her wife won't come down stairs without any lights) and prepares herself to do some combat. Near the kitchen, she was about to pounce only to be greeted with her wife wearing a green mask, curlers, earphones on, and chips in her hands. Both of them scare the shit of each other.
Hey anon!
I don't think I was able to essentially add anything to your amazing idea, but I tried my best.
(I giggled when I read your request... it was a request.. right?... RIGHT?)
A scary surprise
grayson x reader
silly, fluff(?)
Summary: Reader wakes up the middle of the night and decides to make cookies for Grayson while she waits for her. When Grayson arrives home, she believes that burglars entered the house, and she is ready to defeat them.
word count: 1,2k
sorry, not proofread.
You had a stressful day at work, so you weren’t surprised when you woke up in the middle of the night. Much to your displease your wife was still not at home, her place on the bed was still empty. You kept missing her for days, because she came home late and left early in the morning, so you decided to stay up and wait for her.
You didn’t want to read, you were too tired for that, so you went downstairs to bake chocolate chips cookies, which you made at least three times per week, so your wife, Grayson would be able to take some sweet snacks to work. On the corridor leading to the kitchen you checked your hair, it was full of curlers - Grayson loved to play with hair, so you always curled it for her. You fixed some of your naughty strand of hairs, coiled them back right onto the curlers.
In the kitchen you prepared everything, the ingredients, the flour, the sugar, the baking powder, the butter, the eggs and the chocolate chips, as well as the dishes you needed. You mixed the dry ingredients in the proper order and added the melted butter, then the eggs and finally you gently poured and mixed the chocolate chips with the mixture. You also prepared the oven pan and portioned out the dough. You used half of the dough, so you knew two rounds would go into the oven.
As you waited for the first batch to bake you cleaned up everything you used. As the second round went into the oven you went upstairs to the bathroom. You found an aloe vera face mask in the cabinet which expiration date was close, so you decided to use it. It felt so good on your skin, it was cold and soothing. You let out a huge laugh when you saw your reflection in the mirror. Your face covered with green cream, and your hair was full of curlers. You looked like those ‘perfect housewife’ drawings you saw in an older “Everyday in Piltover” magazine from the 60s.
You grabbed your phone and earbuds also the bag of chips you ate before you went to bed from the bedroom and went downstairs while dancing. You wanted to create a party feeling, so you turned off all the lights, and only lit the dim neon lights above the counter in the kitchen. There you were, listening to bangers, shaking your booty and eating chips.
***
Grayson was so done with the day. She wanted to leave the Police Department early, and she wanted to spend some time with you, but first, she was summoned by the Council, and after that all hell broke loose. She had to go to the harbor, then at dinnertime the inmates in Stillwater tried to riot. The enforcers had to take care of the harbor and prison too, and that also meant a lot of paperwork, because Grayson had to write the reports too.
As the cicadas became quieter Grayson had enough and ventured home. She just wanted to cuddle you and fall asleep beside you. The streets of Piltover were quiet, at that hour nobody stopped her for advice or a small chat. Grayson was happy that the people of Piltover were trusting her, but at the end of the day she was just one person with her own personal life.
When Grayson entered the house, she felt that something was off. The house was quiet, but she heard noises from the kitchen, and it was way past 2am, there was not a chance that you were downstairs at that hour, especially that you always left the lights on in the corridor which lead to the stairs, because you had a horrible habit of slipping on the stairs even in broad daylight.
Grayson shook her head when she realized that burglars probably entered her house. She was tired, she let out a big sigh and readied herself for whatever was waiting for her in the kitchen. Burglars, monsters, ghosts, demons, ghouls, hell, she would’ve fought all the creatures from The Shadow Isles if it meant that she could hold you sooner.
Grayson raised her fists and kicked in the kitchen door.
***
The cookies were already out of the oven, but your favorite song was next on the playlist, so you just danced around, when you heard noises from your back. You turned to the source of the clatter only to see that somebody was ready to jump at you.
Both of you shrieked. Your screams cracked the windows, shook the streets of Piltover and Zaun, woke the dragons from their slumber, reached the underworld and echoed through time and space.
“You scared the livin’ shit out of me!” you yelled while gasping for air when you realized that your wife was standing in the kitchen door. You heard your own heartbeat in your ears, blood was rushing through your veins. Both of you had their hands over their heart.
“You telling me?! What is that on your face?” Grayson asked with a thin voice. “I thought you are a zombie!”
“A zombie with curlers in her hair?” you cried out. Even your hands were shaking.
“Maybe the zombie likes to look good?” Grayson retorted while she pulled out one of the chairs to sit down. She had to sit down, her legs became unstable after the scare. “What are you even doing down here this late?”
“I made your fucking cookies!” you yapped as you pointed at the bowl full of freshly made chocolate chips cookies in front of her.
“Oooooooooh.” Grayson said when the realization hit in. “You are way too good to me.”
You let out a short snore. “You idiot.” you walked to her and kissed her forehead.
She buried her face in your stomach. “Thank you, My Love!” she mumbled.
“Care to take a bubble bath with this zombie?” you asked her with a smile.
“But you already took a bath, why don’t you go and rest? It’s so late.” she replied with a kind tone.
You took a big breath and looked at her with a peculiar face. “My Dearest, I know you had a long, and possibly bad day, but please, use your brain for a second.”
Grayson raised her head and stared at you. She lifted her eyebrows, you saw that her remaining brain cells were working hard, and then finally her eyes started to spark. “You meant like… making love bubble bath?” she asked carefully, but she didn’t wait for your reply, with a huge smile on her face she grabbed your hands and showed you th
Warnings: chef! grayson, sous chef! reader, secret/private relationship, praise, grayson has a little bit of inner homophobia, quick makeout
Genre: fluff mostly, lil angst low-key
A/n: this is my 80th fic omg🥹 so close to 100! Thank y’all for sticking with me through this writing journey! Tumblr really is my peace (hence why I’m making time to write sm rn!) I love y’all a lot🧘🏿♀️
───────┈ · ·
The rush today was killing you, feet burning and throat strained from the amount of yelling. The saucier is sick today.
Grayson can see the overstimulation in your body language; what she’d give to kiss it away.
Being an Iranian chef is hard enough, she couldn’t add being openly gay to it. What business would she have?
She rubs your arm as she passes you before checking on the runner to make sure the orders are correct.
You stiffen, not expecting affected during the shift. Keeping your head clear, you continue to watch over who you need to watch and to push out five star quality dishes.
The night ends and you stay behind, wanting to catch a word with grayson.
“What was that?” You ask as you pull out an aged red wine.
She hums out of confusion as she carries a glass for herself and you. “That you did such a good job baby?” She places kisses across your face but moves as she feels you stiffen.
“You rubbed me.”
“It was encouragement” she says dryly, taking the bottle from you and pouring.
“You broke one of the rules” you sigh, hopping up on the counter. She stands in-between your legs, “I know and I’m sorry, this is really hard for you but-”
“I get it, it’s hard out here. In ways it’s easier for me and in ways it’s easier for you.” She presses her head to yours before pulling away.
“Want to try something?” She says with a soft smile, trying to hide her lingering shame. You nod watching as she brought out strawberries and cheese.
“Omg it’s like ratatouille” you gush, always wanting to try the combination but never doing it.
“I think the wine with elevate it.”
She pours the wine in your mouth, telling you to swallow a little. Cupping some of the wine in your checks you make space for the strawberry then the cheese.
Like the movie you close your eyes, searching for that pop on your pallet.
“Well? Is it everything you ever wished?” She whispers, “it’s better because of you.”
You do the same for her and she happily hums.
“Y’know what will make this better?” She says against your lips. You mutter out a, “me duh” before meeting her lips.
The light warm in your chest blooms as she holds you, the smell of her perfume filling your senses as she slides you closer.
The relationship might not be ideal for everyone, but for you. She’s enough.
───────┈ · ·
A/n: I think the concept of adding race and how that can make someone like grayson perceived is so interesting especially with her age so I wanted to tie that in some fics! Especially with reader being black like she’d get it but it would be different y’know? In the closet or not we’re all valid, go by your pace! Love y’all mwah xoxo ( the next grayson fic; which will be last cause of the poll, will be very long so before I post that one I’ll post the first Ellie fic!)
hi friends !!! please feel free to either comment under this or send me asks about what hcs you’d like to see of the arcane women ! i’m open to fluff or smut but i’d LOVE to do some fluffy goodness for them ^_^
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ethan and kristina have a newborn baby and grayson is so jealous bc he just wants to be a dad. he’s begging you every minute of everyday
Blurb Alert! - Grayson Dolan
; he’ll be such an awesome father 🥺
Daddy Blues:
“Look at her little mouth and her little toes!” Elated, Grayson yelped at the adorable baby giggling in his lap. His eyes were all big and full of excitement, his cheeks rosy with nothing but raw and never ending love for the new addition to the Dolan family.
You’d think it to be his own daughter, the way he helped out and stayed around to feed and hold her, often rocking her into a much needed slumber. He hadn’t missed a day of seeing her for two and a half weeks, and by association, neither had Y/N.
She too was effortlessly taken aback by the darling infant. More so, she was in awe of Grayson’s excitement. She was already counting down the hours before he’d ask for his own child, something he’s been looking forward to for majority of his life.
He really didn’t have to ask at first.
One evening, the two of you were alone in the nursery with Ana, letting E and Kristina enjoy a night out without a crying baby. Grayson was swaying in the rocking chair while you leaned against the crib, admiring the two. The hours of counting turned to milliseconds; he simply looked up with knowing eyes.
And you blushed.
“Think about it, Y/N. Never ending happiness for the rest of our lives.” He looked back down at Ana, his cheeks turning a soft red too.
“That— And hardly any sleep.” You, as quietly as you could, half-heartedly chuckled.
“We can do that when we’re retired.” He smiled wide, excitement just oozing from his aura.
“I’ll consider, but don’t give your hopes up Mr.” You joined him in his gaze at the beloved baby girl, your heart sinking in the best, overwhelming ways.
Two days later, on your way home from Ethan and Kristina’s, he asked again.
“You’d be the cutest, most adorable pregnant women anyone’s ever seen! I know it.” He was driving, his grin ear to ear and his eyes bright.
“That’s nine months of no caffeine, Grayson. Not something I can willfully give up just yet.”
“You can have some, just not as much as you usually do.” He chimes. He’s probably read all the rules and guidelines to having your own kid by now.
“Let’s just wait for a minute, Gray. I don’t want to jump into this quite yet.”
Grayson adhered to your wishes, holding himself back for another two weeks, though you could tell he was busting from the seams.
“If we have kids now, you’ll be the young, cool mom and we may even have great-grandkids.” He informed from his seat on the sofa next to you. You set down your enthralling book to give him one of those looks.
“I’d be the cool mom anyway, young and old!”
“Okay, okay.”
Twenty minutes went by, and he looked up from his phone again.
“You could teach them how to read…” He bumped your leg, withdrawing you from your book yet again. This time, you raised your brow and dipped your chin.
“And how to stay quiet when someone’s reading!”
Another few weeks had gone by, the days truly dragging on for Grayson. It wasn’t until you woke early one morning, feeling refreshed from your night of sleep, that you invited the thought of raising children with Grayson.
It’d be wonderful chaos.
The perfect mix of grace and crazy, which is what anyone could only ask for. He’d be a great father too. The thought made you all warm inside, sharing an endless bond with the man you married.
You sweetly shook him awake, laying light kisses upon his jaw. His eyes slowly opened and he smiled, laughing lowly from your ticklish gestures.
“Morning, baby.” His voice was low and gravely.
“Speaking of..” You sat back up, beginning to fiddle with your fingers.
“I’ve been thinking, and..”
“You want to?!” He sat up faster than you expected, his hands found yours and he clasped them together in exhilaration.
You simply nodded, and he wrapped his arms around you in triumph. He pulled you tight to him, chuckling in a boyish way that made you giggle too.
“Let’s get to work then, shall we?” He wiggled his brows, making you laugh aloud.
(a/n pt. 2 : slowly, but surely i will get these asks finished up! again, sorry to disappear.. i also have a series in the works.. another mafia goodie haha..)
Imagine Grayson coming home after a win and finding you and your twins asleep in bed with a ‘We Love the Coach’ banner (Kind of like Cheaper by the Dozen lol). He smiles before gently kissing you on the lips before rubbing your baby bump ever so gently before pecking the twin’s forehead. He’s so happy with how far he’s come with his life, Grayson couldn’t ask for anything more. He changes out of his clothes before sliding in next to you. You lean into him the same as your kids do as well. Not only did Grayson have a team at work but he also had one at home.
Sorry that it was bad, it’s been a while, therefore I am a tad bit rusty lol. Cheaper by the Dozen inspired this lol
ok so we all know that gray rushes/is eager about his relationships, but this time, what if the reader asks him to slow down or something? like she’s just getting started with her degree and she wants to slow down a bit, not rush into things, and eth agrees and gray is finally happy? also sorry if u aren’t taking concepts or requests lol
i feel like...low key....he needs this irl lol
this man doesn’t even have the phrase slow down in his vocabulary so when you say those words, the look of confusion that crossed over his face was to be expected. you knew you would have to spell it out for him, at least slightly. he gets in over his head with every relationship and wonders why they somehow fall apart so soon. some girls fall into that spell: the attractive guy wants me so it must be something real and true and they fall before they ever really form a strong bond, sliding to third base a time or two and tricking themselves into thinking it’s deeper than surface level lust.
but you, you are not the ‘kick it into high gear’ type of gal and you thought you made that pretty obvious from the start. grayson gets attached easily, we all know that. you take your days one at a time, scope out the pros and cons of every situation. and you know, yeah it might be a trauma response from the countless times people have fucked you over and made you out to be a fool from a very young age, but that same mindset has helped you dodge many bullets over the years.
his first initial infatuation—it’s no different with you, but you are how do you say—hyper aware of his intentions and motives. you’ve been screwed over, toyed with, used your fair share of times and the world be damned to hell if some buff fluffy brown haired boy with amber eyes and a smile that oozes light and happiness comes in treating you like you’re this...lost treasure and you just believe him. believe all of the pretty words, take his hand and follow him into the dark, blindly let yourself love someone again not be sure of what they expect out of the relationship. and damn you if you let him swoop in and carry you off like a princess from a tall tower. like he’s this knight in shining armor. you won’t be fooled by the cloud of attraction and get yourself in too deep before you’re completely on the same page with one another. and first things first; you aren’t someone that needs to be saved, and neither is he.
you understand the puppy love stage of relationships. it’s bound to happen: the subtle obsession with your partner, that new light fuzzy feeling you get thinking about them, thinking of what they might be doing when they’re not with you, if they are thinking about you too, listening to all the sappy love songs and suddenly all you can think about is the color of their eyes after they’ve laughed real hard, the dip in their brow when they are thinking for a long time, the electric feeling that zaps your skin when they touch you, the way their voice lowers two octaves when they lean over and whisper something sweet in your ear, it’s all there for grayson. you know you’re falling in deep, and maybe that’s what scares you. maybe it’s the way you are so willing to trust him early on that leads you to the conversation of slowing things down. for the protection of the both of you, it’s not one sided.
not only had grayson made you feel secure in the very beginning of the sudden relation you had started, but he kept consistent with his actions and words. something that was unusual and strange after dealing with men that never really grew up beyond 16. at the stage of your life you’re in, there isn’t any room for a childish game of tag with a boy who didn’t have any intentions of sticking around in the first place.
you worked hard for everything you had, you always have. your upbringing wasn’t one of sunshine, rainbows, and unicorns. you didn’t have it easy. it wasn’t something that you used to weazle your way out of situations, excuse your occasional bad behavior, but it was something you thought about when you did catch glimpse of your growing attraction to someone. especially grayson, who was...one of the nicest men you had ever met. charming really didn’t even cut it. but just starting on your degree...complicated things. made you really want to reiterate to him that your degree, it was important to you and you fought tooth and nail to be able to even touch a college textbook. you couldn’t be blinded by his charms and be distracted from your dreams. there were times where the world seemed dark and hopeless and with hard work and perseverance you climbed out of that hole, just to stand as the strong intelligent woman he was falling head over heels for. you didn’t get that way over night. and you sure as well weren’t going to screw up your studies because you found someone that maybe wanted to stay, maybe didn’t. if the two of you were to work out and keep developing that beautiful bond - you hoped it would be as a team, one with understanding and clarity.
in your past experience, once a man knows he’s got you hooked, that’s the green light to treat you how they’ve wanted to the entire time. their once soft caress turns possessive, trust turns to assumption and blame, dates grow less and less frequent, and are left to sit and wonder what you ever saw in the first place. tricked, manipulated, and heartbroken. it’s never been honesty, love, and acceptance first. it’s “i love you” and “i care” when their actions don’t support their claims. you promised that the next boy you catches your heartstrings and strums until you’ve fallen under their spell, you would know exactly what you’re falling for. that means taking it slow, knowing what makes grayson tick, what he hates, what he adores, what brings him peace and comfort, if he cries during chick flicks, what kind of person he wants to be remembered as, if he fears the unknown as much as you do, was makes him completely and totally happy, and what infuriates him the fastest of all, what hardships has he had to face alone, what haunts his mind in the dead of night where no one can hear him crying, and what thought makes him smile when he’s doing nothing in particular. for once, just this once, you’re heart longed to know more that what meets the eye. you wanted to know if your feelings were 3 demensional, encompassing the good and bad about grayson, or if you truly just loved the way he fucked you.
but most importantly, you wanted him to know you. know the things about you that most people didn’t have the pleasure of knowing, all while making your dreams come true.
you thought maybe it was a mistake reaching out to ethan in your time of dire need of a shoulder to lean on, but it ended up being just the conversation and pat on the back you needed. the right nudge from the right person to have you sitting down with the softest soul you’ve come to find. grayson wasn’t someone you wanted to hurt, and ethan reassuring you that by talking to him and making him slow down, it would save him from more heartache than anything.
“i think it’s going to mellow him out, actually,” ethan nods along with your words, picking at a stray strand on his pants.
he wants what’s best for his twin, which is the exact reason you wanted to have this conversation with him. you didn’t want to mess something up and be rash and childish before anything real really even started, “grayson doesn’t really do ‘slow’, so this will be good for him.”
“i just don’t want to hurt him you know? i don’t want to be another girl that leaves so suddenly when he gets a bit too much. i know those are special circumstances and he was desperate with the desire of finding that special connection...” a pause to catch your breath, nervous from the vulnerability you’re showing already, “but when i make a commitment, i keep it. i want him to know that. i just want him to be secure within his decision to want...whatever this is with me. i want to be able to know him enough that my feelings for him are justified. and vice versa...i don’t want him to think that because i want to slow down, means i want to stop.”
“he will understand more than you think. if there is one thing i know about him, it’s that he will bend over backwards to make something he wants work. if he really wants you like i know he does, he will slow it down and make sure that you are comfortable. sounds like he doesn’t have much choice.” and it’s nice hearing those words from someone you haven’t gotten the chance to grow all that close with yet. hell you’re not even that close with grayson yet. you’re in the beginning stages still, learning your way around life with him in it. independence has always been one of the things that made you, well, you - and Grayson must understand you need more time before moving forward.
“really?” your heavy sigh shows your nerves are shot from worrying about not just school, but about the many different outcomes of the talk you need to have with Grayson. it has to happen, but you’ve never been one for confrontation even if it’s ensuring a positive outcome for both parties.
another shrug with a kind smile from ethan warms your heart, “just talk to him. he’ll appreciate your honesty. most of the other girls got wigged out and dipped, it’s going to mean so much more that you are wanting to stick it out even if it’s going too fast for you right now.”
growing up in a family full of huggers really shows when you step forward to wrap your arms around his waist for a split second, appreciative that he listened to understand and actually help you.
“thank you e, i hope he doesn’t just think i’m trying to make excuses and leave.”
when you pull away he is smiling still, pleasantly surprised by your friendly hug. with a light squeeze to your shoulder and a soft sort of smirk playing on his lips, he gives you just the advice you needed.
“something i’ve learned being his twin; give him a little more credit.”
when you have that conversation that had you so nervous your stomach tossed and turned all day long, you make sure you’re chanting ethans words over in your head. breathe. it’ll be fine. he will understand. give him a little more credit. he really wants you. the words play like a song through your head as you wait for him to sit back down on the white floral sheet in the softest patch of grass in your backyard. water spills from the glass in his hand as he plops onto the ground in a heap of giggles, muttering “fuck” softly, trying (and failing of course) to wipe the water off of his light blue button up shirt. it’s a good color on him, and you’re momentarily distracted from how attractive he looks in the late afternoon sun.
when you first met grayson, he had stumbled upon you sitting all by yourself in a small park, book in hand, peach in the other, completely unsuspecting that you would catch his heart captive when you glanced up with a smile that just about made him pass out. you were still surprised months later that he had had the nerve to say a word to you, he looked ill with anxiety to even utter a word. it was a day you’d never forget - and you would try and remember that innocent look in his eye when you explain why you had planned this picnic in the first place. to talk, to listen, to understand.
you figure if you really want to have the conversation be as smooth as it can be for the both of you, you could take it back to the very start. a simple picnic, with a lot of hope for the future.
after the laughter fit falls down, it’s time to get to the root of the issue. you prepare yourself with a deep breath in, holding in for a few seconds with your eyes closed, then slowly releasing when you look back at the questioning raise of his eyebrows. when he cocks his head to the side, you know it’s now or never. if you don't say it now, you might regret it.
“I actually brought you here so that we could have a talk real quick,” you finally explain, making sure to maintain eye contact and drink in ever facial expression he may have - just so you know how to go forward.
“you know you can talk to me about anything, is something wrong?” He’s so soft with the way he talks, never suspecting anything like what he’s about to hear, and it almost hurts to know you’ll be disappointing him in some way.
“nothing is really wrong...i just think maybe...we should slow it down for a bit.”
“what do you mean? we just got here,” he chuckles, taking a sip of his water with a shake of his head. not understanding, his fingers fiddle with the fringe at the bottom of your sundress.
you continue without stopping, ignoring his joke and hopefully make him see you aren’t here to fool around, at least not entirely. it was a serious talk for once and you wanted him to respect what you had to say.
“-not go so fast we miss the exciting part of getting to know one another,” you carry on to a now confused, sorrowful looking grayson, finally understanding that you weren’t talking so much about the picnic - but the two of you as a whole.
“i still want this—still want you i mean. but i just...want us to be us for a bit and not worry so much about the next step and then the one after that and the one after that and-”
he holds his hand up to stop you, cutting you off while looking at the ground deep in thought. setting the water down slowly, he climbs back up to his feet. you watch him patiently while he treads through the clipped grass, knowing he’s trying hard not to overreact and over think. After what feels like eternity, he sits down with his hands hanging off his knees, picking at a blade of grass he’s ripped from the earth beneath him.
“have i pushed you?”
sweet boy, always trying to take blame.
with a small smile you shake your head, “you haven’t pushed me at all gray. I just want this to grow - want us to grow. i don’t want you getting in too deep before you’re sure you’re ready for all of the things i’m looking for in the future and likewise.”
another nod of understanding, he was listening close. his respect for you grow tenfold, you had the courage to not let your lust or even affection cloud your judgement and you were honest with him. something that grayson admired most from anyone he let into his life was honesty.
“i’m not very good with slow but i’m sure you’re probably right,” he laughs more at himself than anything, “i just get carried away. especially with a woman like you. how couldn’t i?”
always the flirt. and a good one at that. he always knew exactly what to say to get you blushing, which is exactly why you hide your face bashfully in your shoulder for a few moments before you could look back at him admiring you.
“I hope you know that this is different though, Y/n. I can’t exactly explain how, but you should know i’ve never felt this way for anyone no matter how many times i’ve tried to convince myself otherwise in the past out of...fear, shame, even guilt. it’s different. and because of that difference, i know i can’t be selfish with you.”
for once you’re grateful for your mothers voice at the back of your head nudging you to let your heart be open, because without that voice, you would never be sitting in the grass with a man that truly does want to respect your boundaries and looks at you like you’re made of exquisite glass. you wouldn’t have memorized the soft texture of his lips as you lean in to kiss him, or the feeling of his hand cupping your cheek. you wouldn’t know the sound of his relived sigh, or the giggle that breaks the kiss only a few seconds later. and you wouldn’t have the clarity that you so desperately craved.
if there is one thing you knew for sure it’s that he is telling the truth. his truth shows with the delicate placement of his hands, the soft caress of his thumb on your cheek, his fingers running through your hair, and all the other ways he shows his adoration for you every day that you wish to hold on to forever. you know that the waiting and slow pace will be worth it in the end and the slow burn will turn into the blazing fire that you can already tell shines in his eyes. your hesitation has nothing to do with him but a past you would explain in due time.
for now, you’d continue kissing him on the sheet that smelt faintly of laundry detergent, in the backyard of your quaint apartment on 26th and Broadway, with his hand in your hair, lips pressed gently against yours, and a whole heart full of hope for a long future of days just like this.
