#graylit

i’ve waited so long to answer a question like this!! and i’ve been holding off, but i’ve decided to answer it before i go see the last jedi, so i don’t accidentally start rambling about how anakin feels during the movie. so let’s talk about how anakin feels seeing his grandson royally fuck up during the force awakens!!

anakin skywalker, now forced to watch the world and unable to interactive with those he loves most. those he so desperately wants to apologize too. only able to interactive with his son, trying to make amends for the wounds he had created. so when his daughter had a son, anakin was overjoyed to see the skywalker legacy continue, this small family that started with his mother, expanding into something more. he had such high hopes for ben, joining this order that his son had built from the ground up, though he was hesitant about the jedi order returning, he believed in his son and trusted his instincts. but when the day came that the temple burned, by the hand of his grandson, much like anakin himself once did, he felt a deep stab to his heart. a betrayal that the jedi themselves once felt. watching the temple burn and those inside and unable to save them. seeing his grandson, turn into the very monster he too had become. his grandson become fixed, obsessed with the monster he was, the monster he hated and was trying to move on from. at first, he does try, he tries to talk to him, tries to talk him out of it. ben being force sensitive and trained in the jedi ways, means that anakin found it easy to make a connection and reveal himself too him, but as the dark side grew more and more within him, anakin struggled to find that connection, with the fear of the dark side lingering. it was becoming harder to contact him, to beg him to stop this game and go home. back to his mother and father, back to his uncle. that they would forgive him, that it wasn’t too late for him. that he didn’t have to become the very monster that darth vader was and that the galaxy feared. but … nothing he said worked and anakin later stopped trying. he was too far gone and instead spent his days, watching luke live in isolation after the fall. 

seeing ben solo love the monster he was and not the man he is now. seeing him obsess over darth vader, seeing him as some sort of great figure, wanting to finish the emperor’s doings, instead of what general skywalker did during the clone wars, shattered anakin. he was always grateful that luke and leia made vader and anakin seperate entities. they were not the same person, anakin would never again allow himself to become that monster. he too, believed they were protecting ben and he tried to tell him that. but it only seemed to make things far worse in the end.

but when rey arrived on the island for the first time, there was hope that she could return his grandson to the light…

@graylit | mun meme ( accepting )

☂ What’s your best RP experience?

probably meeting @bellassan, tbh. just because Din has become such an important person in my life and in rp, and Ferus is such an important character in Siri’s life and I don’t know how she’s manage to exist in rp world if she didn’t have Ferus. and because extrovert Din just glommed onto introvert me ( in the best way ) and practically demanded that we be friends and tbh that’s the most effective way to make friends with me. 

here’s what happened. ( have I told this story before? probably but I’m telling it again. ) I reblogged this fabulous gifset of Din’s. which I found very soon after making this blog and looking in Ferus’s tags to see if there was anything good of Ferus that I should be reblogging. ( at the time I’d only read Jedi Apprentice and Jedi Quest, tbh, and had not read Last of the Jedi. random detail. ) and tagged it excited that there was fanmade stuff about Ferus, and how much Siri loves her Padawan. 

and Din saw the tags and jumped into my messenger and was all ‘HI YES HELLO I saw your tags on my thing I’m glad you like Siri and Ferus, I do, too.’ and then proceeded to come talk to me every day and repeatedly engage me in conversation even when I let the conversation die ( as introvert me tends to do because I’m bad with maintaining conversation ) and we talked constantly about Siri and Ferus. Din sent me LOTJ ebooks to read and we talked more about Siri and Ferus. we discussed rping and how Din rped Ferus in other mediums but had never done tumblr. 

PLS END HIM.

@reyforceawakend replied to your post: @reyforceawakend liked your post:it should be said...

*Palps Voice* DEW ETT

Siri @ Unkar just like.....

and then

then like

KYLO  BELIEVES  REY  TO  BE  UNREADY.      unprepared  ,  for  that  vivacious  panic  .  the  harsh  sting  !  of  blood  pooling  in  her  blistered  gums  .  it  will  induce  pleas  of  MERCY  ;  a  cease  fire  of  blows  .  she’s  incapable  of  comprehending  the  magnitude  of  time  she’ll  remain  BROKEN  ,  a  future  of  weeks  lain  in  sticky  sheets  ,  skin  held  together  by  the  roughest  stitching  .  it  will  be  weaved  by  her  own  damaged  pads  ,  as  there  is  no  help  in  a  SEA  of  ADVERSARIES  .  there’s  no  bacta  tank  at  disposal  to  hold  her  sand  bitten  body  together  ,  nor  her  mind  .  not  when  even  the  master’s  master  peels  through  REY’S  unwilling  consciousness  like  a  strict  hand  through  water  .  he’ll  pry  her  of  her  good  -  natured  self  until  all  that’s  left  is  the  POWER  !  harbored  beneath  personality  .

                             ―  HE  BELIEVES  SHE  ISN’T  READY   ―                      ―  BUT  SHE  COULD  BE   ―

QUIETLY  ,  HE  TELLS  HER  THIS  .     they  meditate  as  parallel  souls  ,  two  sides  of  the  same  coin  .  the  damp  earth  outside  the  TEMPLE  of  the  KNIGHTS  stains  the  pieces  of  cloth  touching  the  bramble  .  he  spares  her  no  detail  of  his  own  training  underneath  SUPREME  LEADER  SNOKE  .  every  hardhearted  act  that  carved  him  into  STONE  .  a  calculating  eye  peaks  across  the  distance  .

❛     IT  SOUNDS  AWFUL  ,  BECAUSE  IT  IS  .     but  there  is  STRENGTH  in  beating  yourself  from  your  past  WEAKNESS  .   &  if  you  find  yourself  wary  of  corrupting  your  morals  ,  remember  there  is  no  escape  from  destiny  .     IT  WOULD  BE  BEST  NOT  TO  FIGHT  IT  .       ❜

.....let Siri beat up Unkar Plutt 2k17

rey voice : i love all three of my grandparents