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[ID: A four panel image of the Haha Jonathan meme, remade with Saw characters. The first panel is Lawrence, who says, "Hey john sorry I'm late I was doing stuff." The second is Adam, who says, "It's okay...I am 'stuff'..." The third is Lawrence, it reads, "Omg!!!!! Adam!!!!! No!!!!" The final is John, which says, "Haha adam you are banging my daughter." End ID]
Pairing: Alison Gordon x Adam Faulkner Stanheight x Lawrence Gordon
Synopsis: Alison and Adam go grocery shopping. Voyeuristic habits die hard. A nightmare triggers an intimate moment.
Word Count: 3542
CW: infidelity, dub-con make out, panic attack, nightmares, canon-typical angst
Tags: @starlighthides
The space between waking and dreaming was pure bliss for Adam as he lingered in semi-consciousness. The sensations of his dreams spilled over into his body. Lawrence pinned him down, pushing his knees up to his shoulders. Alison had her mouth around his cock running her tongue under his frenulum. He moaned, writhing in the sheets. His visions shifted. His mouth was forced down over Lawrence’s cock, his nose pressed into the doctor’s pubic hair as he gagged. Alison rode him, mercilessly fucking him to her pleasure while Lawrence used his face. His toes curled and he whimpered. His nose was pressed suddenly into Alison’s pubic hair, he lapped at her in slow methodical fashion while Lawrence thrust into him from behind, the doctor’s hand twisted and teased the head of his weeping cock.
Adam gasped, the sudden influx of oxygen pulled him into full consciousness. He lay there panting. Closing his eyes, he willed himself to go back into his blissful dream state but the visions were gone. Still his cock was hard and weeping. Fully conscious now, guilt and shame bombarded him. He couldn’t jack off to the idea of fucking the Gordons. It was…wrong and fucked up. He just couldn’t. He rolled out of bed and shuffled his way into the bathroom where he plunged himself into a cold shower. He forced himself to remain under the painfully cold water until his erection cooperated. It took much longer than anticipated and by the time he got out of the shower he was blue and shivering. He stiffly pulled himself into some clothes before making his way down stairs. Alison was curled up on the couch with a book. Adam recognized the cover instantly, The Stranger by Albert Camus, it was one of his books. Alison must have taken it off of his desk. The Gordons had plenty of books, why steal his? And more importantly, when did she steal it? He hoped she hadn’t seen him writhing in pleasure in his dream state while she was stealing his books. Privacy was no issue with the Gordons, in that they had no issue completely invading his privacy at any moment. She glanced up when she heard him come down the stairs.
“Adam.” She smiled and moved to stand.
“It’s okay.” He held up a hand. “You don’t have to get up. I’m just getting coffee.”
“You know your way around the kitchen?”
“Yeah, I think so.” He nodded.
“Okay, good. Make sure you make yourself something to eat too. You can't survive on just coffee.” She settled back in against the couch cushions.
Adam made himself toast and coffee. Alison joined him at the counter while he put butter and strawberry preserves on his toast.
"Will you go to the grocery store with me?" She asked.
"Um…sure." He said, taking a bite of his toast.
She smiled. "Great. We'll leave in about 2 hours, okay?"
Adam nodded, shoving the rest of the toast slice into his mouth. Alison grinned and trotted off up the stairs. She was still holding his book when she left. He shook his head, wondering when she planned on returning the novel.
When it came time to leave, Alison seemed nervous. Adam tried to act relaxed, but her anxiety was enough to make him feel a little paranoid too. Was she concerned that they would be followed? Did she know something he didn't? He tried to distract them with idle small talk as Alison drove, but she was strangely silent. When they arrived at the market, Alison took a cart and handed him a portion of the list. He grabbed a basket and was off with his little section of the list, thankful to be away from the Gordons for even a brief moment. The collective neuroses of the family were getting under his skin and making him wonder if he was the one being paranoid.
Adam was able to collect the contents of the list relatively quickly. Alison had told him he could grab anything he wanted but it didn't feel right to add anything extra to the basket. He felt like an intrusion, a parasite in their home, and he didn't want to take up too much space or get found out. Found out by what he wasn't quite sure yet, but the feeling was there.
After gathering his portion of the list Adam was able to find Alison in the freezer aisle, talking to another woman. She didn't seem happy so he injected. He stepped in between them and dropped the contents of his basket into the cart.
"I think that's everything." He said to Alison.
Alison seemed relieved, but the woman beside her seemed disgusted.
"And who is this?" She asked.
Alison sighed. "Jennifer, this is Adam."
"Hey." Adam offered his hand. She only stared back at him.
"Adam is living with us right now." Alison continued. "He's um…uh…"
"I'm the nanny." Adam supplied.
The woman raised an eyebrow in disbelief.
"Slash housekeeper." He added on.
"Does Larry know about this?" Jennifer asked.
Alison's jaw clenched. "Yes, actually, Lawrence is the one who invited him. They're friends."
Friends? Only if we're using a very loose definition of the term. Adam thought.
Jennifer turned her attention on him. "You're friends with Larry?" She asked, incredulously. "How did you even meet Larry?"
Bingo. A shit eating grin crossed Adam's face, as the answer immediately supplied itself.
"Jigsaw Survivor's group." He said.
Jennifer's face paled to almost white. Her hand came to her chest.
"Oh! I am so sorry. I didn't mean…"
"It's okay. The Gordons have been incredibly kind to let me stay with them. Honestly, I don't know where I'd be without them." He let himself tear up a little, his voice cracked slightly with overdone emotion. "They've just been so strong. They've really been the best role models for me. I can't thank them enough."
"Of course. They really are an incredible family." Jennifer was backing slightly away now. "I'm sorry I've got…" she gestured away.
"Oh, no worries." Alison waved her off. "It was good seeing you."
"Sure. Tell Larry I said hi." She looked to Adam. "I'm so sorry for everything you went through."
She turned and retreated away. When Adam looked back at Alison she was smiling and shaking her head at him.
"Too much?" He asked.
"You didn't have to do all of that."
He shrugged. "She didn't have to be such a fucking bitch."
Alison laughed.
The rest of the afternoon, Alison seemed more relaxed and Adam felt like he could breathe a little bit easier too. When Lawrence returned home, they were still in the kitchen unpacking groceries.
"You went to the store?" He asked Alison, surprised.
Alison smiled. "I did! Adam went with me."
Lawrence opened the freezer and pulled out the tub of vanilla ice cream they had purchased.
"That's for dessert." Alison huffed.
"I'm just testing it out." Lawrence said, mouth full of ice cream.
Alison rolled her eyes. "I saw Jennifer at the store today."
Lawrence furrowed his brow and tilted his head in thought for a moment. He ate another spoonful of ice cream as he pondered Alison's statement then gave up and shook his head.
"Who?" He asked.
"Jennifer?" Alison was irritated, he should know this woman.
He shrugged.
"Whitmer?"
He made a face and repackaged the ice cream. Adam smiled, it was obvious that Lawrence didn't like this woman either.
"What did she want?" He asked as he placed the tub back in the freezer.
"Oh she just wanted to make sure that I said hi to Larry for her."
Lawrence rolled his eyes.
"She's your biggest fan you know." Alison teased.
"Well I'm not a big fan of hers." Lawrence said.
He grasped Alison's hips in his hands and pulled her in close against his chest. Alison smiled and leaned into him. He kissed her temple and pushed his face into the top of head to smell her hair. She closed her eyes as she melted into him. They were the image of domesticity. Alison's hair glowed in the last glimmers of sunlight filtering through the windows. Lawrence's soft smile betrayed a deep affection. People paid good money to have photos like this taken, and here it was, picture perfect. Adam never felt more like a voyeur than he did right now, intruding on this intimate moment between them. He was invisible, and he couldn't look away.
Lawrence glanced up, catching his eye. Fear crushed Adam's chest. I'm caught. Without thinking he took a quick step back and slammed his hip into the counter top of the island, making him hiss in pain. When he looked up, both of the Gordons were staring at him. His stomach churned. He needed to vomit.
"Sorry. Sorry." He blurted out before rushing out of the kitchen. From the corner of his eye he thought he saw Alison reach out for him.
Fuck. Fuck! He cursed himself as he grabbed his jacket and rushed out the front door. He managed to make it to the backside of the garage before coughing up bile into the dirt. His hands were still shaking as he lit up a cigarette and started smoking.
"Hey." Lawrence suddenly materialized around the corner of the garage.
Adam jumped. "God! Fuck!"
"Not quite." Lawrence teased.
Adam stared at him, bewildered.
"It's just a joke, like—"
"No, I get it." Adam took a drag off his cigarette. "It's just not funny." He mumbled.
Lawrence ignored the last part of the comment. "Thanks for going to the store with Alison today. It meant a lot to her."
"No worries."
"She's been having a hard time getting out of the house lately. I know she must've felt safer with you around, so…I really appreciate you doing that. Thank you."
"It's the least I could do." Adam said, staring at the ground.
"Are you okay?" Lawrence asked.
"Yeah, I'm just—ah—" when Adam looked up he was almost chest to chest with Lawrence. How'd he sneak up like that?He tried to take a step back but his back hit the wall of the garage.
"You're trembling." Lawrence said, his voice was low and soothing. It was the voice he must've used on inconsolable patients or when disciplining children. He was making it clear that he wasn't there to argue. It was an appealing combination of gentle and uncompromising.
"No I'm not!" Adam spat back. It was petulant, even he heard it, but it was all he could think to say in the moment.
"Okay." Was all Lawrence said. He grasped Adam's wrist and brought it up between them. The cigarette shook between his trembling fingers. Lawrence carefully pried it from between his fingers and dropped it to the ground where he used his foot to crush it into the dirt.
"You should really try to quit." He said in his low, smooth voice again.
For a moment, Adam thought he might do anything Lawrence asked him to in that voice, but then his senses came back to him and he pulled his hand away. He shuffled sideways along the garage wall to get out from underneath Lawrence then skittered around the corner without looking back or saying anything. He knew it was childish but he couldn't stay there and he didn't know how else to escape. What was Lawrence trying to do to him anyway?
Shaken, Adam hid in his room until dinner. It felt juvenile, but what else was he supposed to do? He felt guilty for intruding on an intimate moment between the Gordons and he couldn't understand Lawrence's behavior towards him. He felt trapped but running away felt ridiculous. It's not a big deal, he tried to convince himself, but the memory of Lawrence making eye contact with him through his wife's hair made his blood run cold for reasons he couldn't explain, even to himself. At dinner, everyone acted normally, so he tried to act normal too. He tried to convince himself he was just being paranoid. What other possible explanation was there? He was relieved when it was finally late enough that he could excuse himself for sleep. He was exhausted from trying to play normal and he felt like he was coming out of his skin. What was Lawrence trying to get him to do anyway? Did he know that Alison had been so affectionate towards him? Was he angry? Was he intrigued? Adam shook his head.
Lawrence knocked on his door shortly after he got changed for bed. He took a deep breath and tried to keep himself from getting too anxious. Lawrence comes by every night. It's not a big deal. Just answer the door and act normal. It's fine. Everything is okay. He swung open the door.
"Hey."
"Hey." Lawrence smiled, but Adam didn't react. "I have these for you."
Lawrence held out two small pills and a glass of water. Adam took them without hesitation, trying to act like nothing was wrong. Lawrence knew better.
"Are you okay?" He asked.
"I'm fine."
"You seem a little…anxious."
"No." Adam answered too quickly.
Lawrence's eyes narrowed slightly at him. Adam felt like Lawrence could see straight through to his bones. He had never felt so exposed.
"Whatever you say." Lawrence said.
Adam closed the door, unable to meet Lawrence's eye any longer.
"What the fuck?" He whispered to himself.
Why are you so scared? You don't have anything to hide. But he knew that wasn't the real problem. The real problem was he didn't know what Lawrence had to hide either.
Sleep did not come easily for Adam. He kept tossing and turning, unable to stop thinking about his interactions with Lawrence and Alison. What was going on with them? What were they trying to get from him? What were they doing to him? When he finally did fall asleep, he had nightmares.
"Adam." The voice was only vaguely familiar. It was etched into his mind from this singular moment.
Adam lifted his head from where it was leaned back against the pipes. His vision was blurred, breathing was difficult.
"Focus." The voice said.
He drew a breath in and the face in front of him came into focus. Jigsaw. It was the only name he knew for the man, the man that was now handing him a scalpel.
"Do you understand?" They said.
Adam looked down at his thigh, they had ripped his jeans open to expose a large area of his skin. They had done him the favor of marking out exactly what they wanted him to take, a puzzle piece in black marker drawn out on his thigh. Adam nodded dumbly.
"You have two minutes."
Adam didn't waste time before cutting in. It hurt so much more than he expected. He had thought his condition would numb some of the pain, but if anything it only heightened the agony. He could feel the incision in his spine. He screamed but persisted. His hands shook, making the incision ragged.
"You're running out of time." Jigsaw said.
He wasn't going to lose again. In desperation, Adam drove his fingernails into the incision he had made and gripped the strip of flesh. He yanked backwards, ripping it up from his leg. Agonized screams ripped through his throat, tearing out what was left of his infected lungs. He pulled again, finally separating the few remaining sinews that held the flesh. A scream or a whimper came with every breath now. He clutched the wet flesh in his shaking hand. The man reached down and pried it from his fingers. They smiled as they assessed the puzzle piece of flesh.
"Very good." They soothed. "Very good Adam, you've exceeded all my expectations."
Adam was panting heavily, his vision was drifting in and out. The man stroked his face affectionately.
"Just relax." They said.
There was a sharp pain in the side of his neck.
Adam sat up in bed screaming. He was drenched in sweat, it had soaked through his clothes and left him shivering. He clamped his hand over his mouth to stop the sound and rolled into the fetal position. He was hyperventilating against his hand when he felt someone grab him from behind. He screamed and struggled but the arms wrapped tightly around him, pinning his own arms to his torso. His captor rolled on top of him, pinning him to the bed.
"No!" He screamed. "No!"
"Shhh…calm down. Calm down. It's me. Just relax." A voice said.
Adam kicked but it was useless. He gasped for air. He screamed one last time in desperation.
"Shhhh! It's okay. It's just me. Relax. It's just me." The voice was very familiar.
Adam was shaking, still panting but not struggling.
"There you go. It's okay. It's just me." Adam finally placed the voice speaking now: Lawrence.
Adam squirmed and tried to free himself but Lawrence held him tightly.
"No. No." Lawrence scolded firmly. "Stop. Just relax."
Adam whined.
"I know. Just stop. Take some deep breaths."
Adam heard and felt Lawrence taking long, exaggerated breaths behind him. He cried out once more, but his struggling was becoming weaker. Finally, he gave up and took a deep breath with Lawrence's guidance.
"Good." Lawrence encouraged. "A few more."
Adam took a few more deep breaths and felt his body relax a little against the restraint.
"Good boy. Good." Lawrence purred.
Lawrence rolled onto his side, pulling Adam with him. They laid side by side for a while, Adam tucked in against his chest, while he caught his breath. When he was calm, Lawrence pulled him to the edge of the bed.
"Come on, let's get you into the shower." He said. He was using that voice again. That gentle but uncompromising voice. The voice Adam couldn't say no to.
Lawrence pulled him up by the shoulders and maneuvered him towards the bathroom. They left the lights off. The bright light seemed too obtrusive. Adam heard Lawrence start the hot water. He let Lawrence undress him. Lawrence pulled his soaking shirt off over his head and stripped away the boxers that were clinging to his body. He tried not to think about what Lawrence might think of him so exposed. His fingers unconsciously found the scar on his thigh. It was a broad, shiny, white scar. It looked more like an amorphous blob than a puzzle piece now.
"Don't pick at your skin." Lawrence said, pulling his hand away. "Get in."
Lawrence pulled his shoulders around and guided him into the hot shower. Adam stood completely still, head hanging low, feeling helpless. He let Lawrence do whatever he wanted. Lawrence scrubbed his body and washed his hair. Adam didn't offer any help but he didn't offer any resistance either. He felt like a child again, with his parent scrubbing him down after being sick in bed.
When the shower was over Lawrence guided him out and wrapped him in a large warm towel. It must've recently come out of the drier. Adam wasn't sure how that was possible. How long had he been in the shower? Had Alison stepped into the bathroom at any point? He wasn't sure. Lawrence left him alone for a minute and just Adam stood there in the bathroom completely still and silent. The darkness swallowed him up and started to melt him away. He wanted to become invisible again. Lawrence returned, forcing him back into uncomfortable visibility, and helped dress him into sweat pants and a tee shirt. Lawrence took him by the shoulders again and led him out.
When Adam crossed the threshold of his room and stepped into the hallway he realized that he didn't know where they were going or what he was doing. He put on the brakes, planting his heels.
"Where are we going?" An edge of panic bled into his voice.
"We're going to bed." Lawrence said, pushing him forward.
Adam didn't like it but he also didn't have the will to fight so he let Lawrence manhandle him down the hall with only minor resistance. Lawrence pushed him into the Gordons' bedroom then closed the door behind them.
"Is he okay?" He heard Alison ask from the darkness.
"He's fine." Lawrence said as he pushed him towards the bed.
"Um…" Adam started to protest as Lawrence lowered him onto the bed.
Any protest was silenced by Alison. She wrapped her limbs around him and pulled him the rest of the way down to the mattress. Adam started to panic. What was happening? What were they doing to him? He tried to pull away but was quickly trapped when Lawrence came to lay directly behind him.
"You're okay." Alison cooed. "You're safe."
Adam whimpered and tried to sit up, but the Gordons held him down.
"Easy." He heard Lawrence say. "Just relax."
"You're okay right where you are." Alison added.
Someone was stroking his hair. Someone else was rubbing his shoulders. Someone else was stroking his thigh. He couldn't move. He was being held down. He felt surrounded by an impossible number of bodies. He started to hyperventilate.
[ID: An image of two Taco Bell sauce packets, one orange and one red. The orange one has a small message on it, "Are we gonna be okay?" The red one says, "I wouldn't lie to you." End ID.]
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
[ID: A digital drawing of Adam and Lawrence from Saw (2004). Lawrence, to the right, crosses his arms and smirks. His speech bubble reads from a Youtube comment by Jaques Francais, "I study medicine and I am impressed by your arm veins! Would love to puncture them!" Adam, on the left, crosses his legs and holds up a recording camera at Lawrence. He squints and blushes at him, taken aback at what Lawrence is saying. End ID.]
