GoldenChronicles!

He told me the moon gave him comfort. It reminded him of an unchanging love... “Minor things about us may change, just as the moon does. Yet at the end it’ll be the same moon and we’ll be the same crazy kids who fell in love way too hard.” I told him that I hoped to look at the moon and feel the same way (though I didn’t know for sure if that was possible). In this emotional desert, my heart forgot this love. It all feels like a false reality right now. Were all my dreams and hopes unrealistic? Or was my reality too far gone from my dreams?

Waking up with sickness of the heart and body is painful, but being healed from that echo of death by the awakening of a cool and bright morning is an experience I wouldn’t trade. With my head pounding and my heart aching, I saw that the world was waking up through my little basement window. To increase the desire to go out and see, my phone enlightened me that it was also a rare 63 degrees on this August morning. The facts had decided for me. There I was, in my raggedy tank top, boy shorts, and remainders of my coffee (which was now cold). I brushed off the dirt from a chair on the deck and took my position. I waited and watched. I felt and heard. I let the earth speak to me and in doing so, heal what had been broken.

I still remembered his words. And I still desired to feel the same way about the moon as he did. My cough started to subside. More than likely because I was sitting up and the mucus could drain properly. My heart began to rest for the first time since this journey began. I looked to the trees and what I saw caught my breath. On the highest part of this miniature lush forest in my backyard the first light of dawn breathed on those mighty branches turning everything a golden matte. Everything else surrounding was just normal colors; normal green, normal brown, normal textures. The best way I could describe it is if someone took a picture of these trees and created a filter worthy of being called a deity but targeted the filter for only one spot of the photograph. And that is the part that caught my attention so suddenly. I almost lusted for the trees in a very strange way. I didn’t quite want the trees but I somehow wanted to be closer to them than I currently was. The feeling was so strong, that tears came.