#godimgettingold

So today the Marshmallow is turning thirty-*mumblemumble* and for my birthday I would like y'all to give me your favorite, horrible, dirty, awful wlw stories. I mean I'm talking violence, face slapping, cages, kidnapping..~hugging~..I'm pretty sure y'all know what I like with the stuff I write.

This is the first Saturday in weeks I’ve been able to linger in bed and I admit, it feels great, but that isn’t what I want to prattle on about today.

I received a text last night from an old friend of mine. I’d passed out by the time she’d sent it, so I answered her this morning. Turns out she quit her well paying job in social services. I asked her what she was going to do now and she has already managed to find something small.

The older I get and the more people I talk to, it seems few of us are happy with where we are. I know I’ve been struggling a lot lately because I’m turning 35 this year and feel as though I have nothing to show for it. My path has been a bit rocky, but with a lot of help from family and friends, I managed to get my degree....that I haven’t been able to do anything with.

Since I decided to drop out of the masters program, I’ve flailed from job to job. To be honest, I can’t say there’s much about any of them that I enjoy- other than having a paycheck. I’ve loved my co-workers, though :) Bouncing from one job to another has made me fully realize I will not be happy until I have a job that is meaningful or creative. I am not built for office jobs or cubicles and in a world like the one we live in now, I struggle to find a balance between my mental health and the life I long to have.

Everyone says money cannot buy happiness, but society says otherwise. It’s about getting out there, making money to pay your bills, achieve your dreams of travel to exotic places, the newest clothes, and having the best house on the block. What I’ve found is the more you’re paid, the more stress you have. Is it really worth it in the end? What’s wrong with a small home full of things you need? It would allow you to work less than you do and make time for hobbies/projects.

Unfortunately, there are many people who don’t even make enough, despite working full time, to have a place of their own. This is the category I fall into. Even when I made $13.45/hr, I wasn't quite able to move out. Everyone asks why I don’t move to Wichita, but I can’t afford $700/month for a two bedroom apartment, utilities, childcare, and all the other bills I have. I’d need to win the lottery or find a job that pays me at least $18/hr. I’ve been trying to do some photography on the side, but I need to get better before I am fully comfortable charging more than I have in the past. I’ve also been considering starting a line of greeting cards, but I have a ton more research to do before it could take off.