“I told you.” 

Gon just glared at Yeong’s head, ignoring his Unbreakable Sword and looking out the car window as the car began to move.  

“Told him what?” he heard Tae-eul ask from beside him, and Gon slowly turned to his queen and smiled innocently. But before he could say something that would convince her that he was innocent, Yeong ruined it. 

“Nothing.” 

Gon rolled his eyes. Yeong was brilliant in so many ways-- and absolutely pea-brained in other ways. 

Gon knew Tae-eul was a dog with a bone now, but he tried anyway. “I know this secluded garden restaurant close by. It’s got the best jjajangmyeon in the region.”

In her most queenly voice, Tae-eul just said one word. “Jangmi?” 

That word of doom. Gon closed his eyes. 

Yeong must have signaled or glared or something, because instead of answering, Jangmi ranted, “Yeah, yeah, you’ll kill me, but I can fight back with you and I can’t with her and she knows where it hurts and won’t bruise, Captain.” 

Tae-eul burst out laughing and Gon couldn’t help grinning either. It was hilarious how Jangmi was wrapped around Tae-eul’s little finger.  

“Jangmi, tell me,” Tae-eul said in a sing-song voice, and Gon was thrilled--forgetting what was going on for a second-- when she reached for his hand and played with it in her lap. She often did this when they were in the car. 

Almost without breath, Jangmi said, “Captain told His Majesty they should have barred Gong Shin from the auction.” 

Gon looked askance at his wife but she only continued playing with his hand and said, “Why?” 

“Because Gong Shin has a crush on you,” Jangmi said, matter-of-fact. 

“What? No, he doesn’t.” 

Gon broke his resolve to keep quiet. He looked incredulously at Tae-eul. “He does.” 

In the front seats, both Yeong and Jangmi nodded. 

“Don’t be ridiculous. And even if he does have a crush on me, why would you bar him from the auction just for that?” 

“Well, he ended up winning the auction and touching you, Mama,” Yeong said. “And that can be problematic for security.” 

“He barely touched me.” 

“Someone might now plan something and frame him, or use the excuse that they have a crush on you in the hopes of swaying public sympathy.” 

Tae-eul only shrugged. “Is that it? Well. If someone’s stupid enough to think and try that, then it’s Gong Shin who’s getting the short end of the stick, isn’t it, not me.” 

Gon sighed. Yeong sighed. Jangmi sighed and drove on. 

“What are you sighing for? I have you all. Does he even have security aside from the one in Brent Hills? He should make sure he has a good one.” 

This time Gon saw Yeong nod as if agreeing that the queen made perfect sense. 

And Gon didn’t like that. Why did Yeong always betray him these days anyway? 

He still shouldn’t have touched you.

Everyone in the car looked at him. 

Oh. He’d said that out loud. 

Tae-eul was gripping his thumb and forefinger in each hand. “Don’t think I don’t know about your fans.” 

He blinked. “What about them?”

“They send you so many bouquets and cakes and gifts on your birthday that Lady Noh and Secretary Mo have to clear two to three palace rooms for them all. They have websites and SNS pages with your face all over them. They have videos of you riding in the racetracks and they edit old pictures of you and Seo-ryeong and replace her face with theirs.” 

Jangmi was grinning. Yeong’s head moved in that gesture which meant he was trying not to laugh. 

“What are you saying? I don’t care about those. You can order that stopped and it will stop, you know.” 

“Why should I? They don’t bother me.” 

“They don’t?”

“I like the flowers.” She scrunched her nose up at him in that adorable way and he would have smiled if he wasn’t half-scared. “They send really good bouquets.” 

“What if they send me nudes?”

Tae-eul actually giggled. “If any nudes from fans make it to your phone or laptop, show me. And Yeong and Jangmi.” 

“So you’re not jealous at all?” Gon said, knowing he sounded ridiculous but half-way curious and excited about where this was going. His queen always surprised him. 

He stopped breathing when Tae-eul turned to him with such a look in her eyes that all his blood went somewhere it shouldn’t, not while they weren’t alone. 

She had intertwined her fingers with his. “You’re married to me. To me. You’re mine. They can have whatever crumbs they can get and they can send you cake and flowers and gifts but you’re mine.” 

Gon cleared his throat and adjusted his seat. “Yes, well--” 

Tae-eul smiled as if she knew exactly what she did to him. She played with his thumb with her other hand. The minx. 

Jangmi and Yeong hadn’t turned around once nor even looked at them through the mirror. 

So he bent his head and-- “For God’s sake, wait until you get home.” He and Tae-eul started at Yeong’s bark. “Please. Pyeha.”

He kissed Tae-eul anyway. Just a quick kiss. Then his heart skipped a beat again when she just smiled and pulled him closer. 

“When we get home,” she said, her lips tantalizingly close to his. “You’re going to write him a note.” “Write who a note?”

“Who do you think?”

He pressed his lips together and didn’t say anything. 

Tae-eul squeezed his hand. “You’re going to tell him you won’t behead him.”

Tae-eul waited until he nodded, and then leaned back on her seat and continued playing with his hand. 

Gon sat back too, sighing, and glared at Yeong’s head. “Yeong-ah, are you her Unbreakable Sword or mine?”

Yeong didn’t answer. 

“Why did you tell her that?” Because only Yeong knew Gon had shaken Gong Shin’s hand, patted him on the shoulder, and told the man he would be beheaded. Jokingly, of course. 

Yeong sighed. “She knows where it hurts and won’t bruise.”  

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Title is Gon’s main thought lol

Directly follows Corea News Royal Triangle? Gong Shin will buy your house and touch your queen (This title is from the “steal yo wife” memes btw haha but you probably already got that)