@glorynot asked : “ why does it always have to be a fight with you? ”
WORDS SING something stinging , like a stab wound to the gut . he carries his hand to massage his temple , a sign of an obvious stress that presses ‘gainst his scalp , his chest , his rolling stomach . anger manifests in him , & he wants to suppress it , he does . however , he’s failed , as usual . he’s made oh , so many mistakes .
he stops himself . this gut wrenching feeling would only get worse with the more words that utter from his lips . this person he follows around like a lost animal , burdened by the plague of loneliness . he has no right to argue when he knows his words are futile . it hurts his heart , the way z’mahti lashes back at him . he should come to expect it , the way he treats him so poorly .
he throws his hands down to his sides , releasing any hope of a conversation however civil . his lip quivers for a moment , as he cannot bear the all - too - familiar emotions that race through his mind & heart . he carries expectation for those that he loves & they proceed to let him down again & again . it reminds him of his past for a brief moment . when the people who he yearns to simply cherish his presence would lash out at him , berate him , accuse him of atrocities ( some performed , others , he simply shouldered the blame ) .
he crosses his arms & closes his eyes . he cannot bear to see the real world when he cannot even control the one inside of his head .
❛ i’m sorry , right ? c’mon then . enough of this . . . this riffraff . ❜
his voice shakes when he speaks . ❛ mind yourself & leave if i’m such an agony to partner with . i’ll not follow you this once . ❜