TOTALLY NORMAL AND REGULAR UNHACKED AND LEGAL playthrough of pokemon crystal TODAY (7/13) at 6pm est!
there is nothing wrong with this legally obtained and untarnished copy of pokemon crystal that i am playing on my legitimate nintendo hardware. /gaslighting. [bit aside, i am doing a glitch run. cas has warned me that there will not be anything particularly spooky, as well as nothing too eyestrain inducing] i am probably going to succeed very well at this game that came out in (checks notes) the year 2000. jesus hh gregg
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All-Glitch Pokemon Blue Run Pt17 (Final): A Whole New World
Professor,
You've always nagged-- uh, I mean, informed-- me about the importance of taking copious, detailed notes about everything, for the importance of research and records. So even though you were in the audience that day, I'm sending you my report about my fight with the Elites.
I know you strongly advised that I train a little more before taking them on. After all, the team was only at level 40. I agree that was a little low. You told me I was being rash and impatient, and maybe I was, I don't know. But I knew my team felt ready. They were so eager to fight for me, and I believed in them.
So I entered the arena, and faced off against the first: Lorelei. I won't lie; she was so easy it was almost trivial. Wobbles' Thunderbolt wiped out almost all her pokes in a single hit. Lapras needed two hits, but it was still easy to tank a Hydro Pump from it. The only uncertainty was Jynx, but after paralyzing it, Charmed could deliver a Fire Blast to its face.
In almost no time at all, I was already in Bruno's chamber. At least this fight took a little longer, but we still weren't working up a sweat. I opened with Jasper to face his Onix. Jasper had been training for this. He'd taken out countless Onix on Victory Road. This one went down like all the others. Hitmonchan was next. I paralyzed with Gia first, but then Bruno started to use X-Defends. I pondered this. It meant I wanted to use some decent Special attacks. Only two of my pokes really had decent Special, of course-- Wobbles and Charmed. I switched Wobbles in, although he caught a hefty Counter to the face for it. Still, he cleared the Hitmonchan out no problem. Next up was Hitmonlee, and I was able to clear it out with Giago, bashing away with Strengths. There was a second Onix, but Jasper wiped it out as easily as the first. The ace was Machamp. While this pokemon is known as an absolute beast of an attacker, he simply doesn't stand a chance against Giago's raw bulk and defenses. She simply shrugged the attacks off and took the pokemon down.
On to Agatha. Things were finally starting to get more difficult. I opened with Jasper, since he knew Earthquake. She started with a Gengar. After a Screech and two Earthquakes, Jasper was able to take the ghost out, since the Gengar didn't use particularly wise moves. Next was Golbat, but it was a trifle with Wobbles' Thunderbolt. Haunter was also easy for Jasper: after a Screech it only needed one Earthquake to go down. Before it left, though, it used a Confuse Ray. When Arbok came in, it was a little more serious for Jasper. The snake used Glare and now Jasper was both confused and paralyzed. Earthquakes did some damage, but not tons. What's worse, Arbok was Screeching and using Acid, so Jasper's defense kept dropping. Jasper finally went down to a Bite before he could finish the job he started. But he left the Arbok rather low of health and easy pickings for a revenge attack. Charmed did this handily.
Then was the final Gengar. I started with a Thunder Wave from Gia. The Gengar chose to poison Gia. Honestly, that was a blessing in disguise; I didn't want to deal with Hypnosis and Dream Eater. Giago chipped away with the only move she could use, Surf, but it was slow going due to Gengar's massive Special. Eventually Gia succumed to the growing Toxic damage. I sent Dusty in next and it was very much the same story: Get hit by Toxic, chip away with Hydro Pumps, eventually go down to Toxic. To my irritation, Agatha then used a Super Potion. I brought in Charmed and Fire Blast things, but run out of Fire Blast and have to resort to Embers. Then Agatha uses a Super Potion AGAIN. I start to grow aggravated as Charmed goes down to Nightshade.
Thankfully, Fractal comes in and saves us from this annoying battle. A well-aimed Fly ends the fight.
Agatha admits defeat rather begrudingly, but tells me to keep going.
At long last, I reached the final Elite chamber. It belonged to Lance, the dragon tamer. He took some time to wax poetic about how rare and difficult dragons are to find and train, claiming them to be the superior pokemon typing that will dominate all others. I smirked at him.
"Best not rest on your laurels. A new and even more powerful pokemon type could always come along, you know."
The guy chuckled. He told me,
"Yes, I've heard people talking about your so-called 'glitch' pokemon. Personally, I'm not sure if I believe your story."
I reached for my pokeball and told him it was time to see for himself.
Thankfully, Lance's opening pokemon was a pushover. As intimidating as Gyarados was, it collapsed like a wet paper towel to Wobbles' Thunderbolt. Dragonair was made of sterner stuff, though. I decided to play it safe and start by Thunder Waving with Gia. Then I switched to Jasper. A Screech and a couple Earthquakes are all that's needed, although it helped a great deal that Dragonair missed its Hyper Beam. I don't know if even Jasper could have dealt with that kind of hit.
I met the second Dragonair with the same Thunder Wave treatment. Then I sent Dusty in, hoping to chip away with Ice Beams. Unfortunately, Dusty never gets her chance. She goes down immediately. However, Wobbles can clear the dragon away with Aurora Beam.
The fourth pokemon is an Aerodactyl. Like the others, I Thunder Wave, and then I tell Jasper to chip away with Hydro Pumps. Of course, Jasper is more of a physical attacker, but it did some damage. When Jasper fainted, I sent Charmed in to try out some Fire Blasts. It helped wear the Aerodactyl down some more, but it wasn’t not enough. However, at this point, Fractal could finish things off, smashing through the rocky beast at high speeds.
Lance sent out his ace, Dragonite.
Same old story-- I open with Thunder Wave. Then I use some Strengths. It's a bit slow going, but Giago, like Jasper, is more about the long game and survivability. Eventually Gia wears that dragon down to about 1/4 of its health. Then Gia falls. I think I can bring Fractal in to finish things.
But then, Lance uses a Super Potion. It's a slap to the face, honestly. I'm still not sure why using potions during a battle is officially allowed in the rulebook.
My Missingno falls to the Dragonite, and I'm down to just Wobbles.
I tell Wobbles to use Aurora Beam. Wobbles turns and starts glowing bright.
But then, something horrifying: Dragonite moves first. It launches itself bodily towards Wobbles.
I watch helplessly. I know Wobbles' defense is paper-thin. I had been counting on Wobbles outspeeding the paralyzed dragon. But the problem was, it had used so many Agilities that it was faster now.
The dragon careens toward us, a massive brute compared to the tiny body of Wobbles. I think it's over.
But then, in the last moments, Wobbles somehow manages to slip past. The dragon crashes loudly onto the ground.
Then Wobbles aims, and he fires.
When the dust settles, Lance is forced to eat his words. He accepts his loss, and he's forced to admit that my glitch pokemon are actual, real things, and not some fanciful delusions.
I think it's finally done. I'm mentally preparing my victory speech. But Lance doesn't concede that I am the new Champion. Instead, he smiles sort of smugly, and tells me there's one more person I must face.
And it's Professor Oak's freaking grandson.
I had to take a five-minute breather first. I healed up my team and tried to psyche myself up. All things considered, these Elites hadn't been too terrible to face. But I was starting to grow a little weary, and that last dragon battle had been pretty close.
On the other hand, this was Oak's grandson. I mean, how hard could he be? I had spanked him just before heading up Victory Road, so it was doubtful he'd gotten much stronger since then.
So we headed back out there, onto the Champion's stage. Blue gave me some grand speech about his journey, about all the things he'd learned as he helped out Oak, and how he'd assembled a team that would beat any Pokemon type.
I just laughed and asked him, "Are you sure about that?"
He seemed annoyed and told me they could beat even "my pack of freaks."
Done wasting time, I sent my ace out first. He deployed his Pidgeot. It honestly was pathetic; Wobbles blasted the thing clean out of the sky.
He sent his Alakazam out next, though, and I was a little more cautious about that. Like before, I used Giago to paralyze it, and then tried chipping away at it. Gia never had stellar Special, so she goes down. However, just like before, Fractal's devastating attack strikes the powerful Psychic pokemon down. Fractal might be a glass cannon and easy to underestimate, but when you get in his line of fire, you'd best look out.
Next was Rhydon, and I sent Dusty out. To my wonder and joy, Dustdevil solos the Rhydon with Hydro Pumps. I cheered, happy that Dusty was contributing too.
Arcanine comes out next, and although Dusty does her best with Hydro Pump, she quickly folds to the fire dog's strength. I sent Jasper out, and try again with Hydro Pump. Jasper's Special may not be better than Dusty's, but as a sturdy fellow, he could stand up to the dog's strikes until he blasted it with enough water.
Next out is Exeggcute. Charmed has her time to shine, and engulfs the tree in a ball of flame.
Finally, it's Blue's ace, Blastoise. Giago had fainted at that point, so there was no help from paralysis here. I sent out Fractal to do some damage, but he goes down quickly. Dusty as well. Jasper is weakened from his fight with Arcanine and also falls. It's down to a weakened Charmed and Wobbles.
I don't bother sending Charmed out. I knew that her Slashes and fire moves weren’t going to be enough. A fire lizard against a water turtle just isn't a wise move. So really, it's up to Wobbles, my starter.
Thankfully, thankfully-- Wobbles outspeeds. Even more thankfully, Wobbles is able to OHKO the Blastoise with one Thunderbolt.
And then, we'd done it.
There was so much shouting and jubilation from the crowds after that, that it's a bit of a blur. I know Oak rushed down to the arena to talk to us. I remember Oak saying he was proud of how much I'd grown since I'd left with his little Charmander. I can't believe I'm saying this, but I'm pretty sure Oak still had no idea there was something off about my pokemon. Like, was he sitting in the far back or something? Does this guy have vision problems? I don't know, but I didn't have the heart to tell him that the little Charmander he'd given me was quite a bit different now. As in, I'd raised it and then hybridized it with a Charizard'M. I figured it was fine, though-- he didn't really need to know.
You know what happened after that-- the talk we gave together to the public about glitch pokemon. But when it was time to officially register myself and my team in the Hall of Fame, I went to the room alone with Oak. So I'll tell you what happened.
It was short and simple. Oak gave a brief speech, ceremonial stuff. Then we put my pokeballs into a machine.
The machine displayed the records on a screen. It looked like this:
The machine didn't seem to really process the glitch pokemon correctly, so it displayed the same confusing jumble of pixels for each of them. Unfortunately, Charmed's natural cloaking abilities were so strong, the machine failed to even recognize her and generate a record for her. That's really unfortunate, since she did contribute to the team! Maybe in the future, though, we can adjust the equipment to understand glitch pokemon.
By the end of it, the machine was emitting a strange sort of noise-- I think Dusty messed with its audio settings. It seemed to unnerve Professor Oak, but he carried on with the ceremony anyway.
And that was it. I'd become Champion of Kanto.
It’s all so strange to think about. This summer hasn’t turned out at all like I had expected it to. I’m visting mom at home today, in Pallet Town. When I woke up this morning and laid there, thinking about the events of yesterday, I had to wonder for a moment if it was all a dream.
I’m just a Bug Catcher from Pallet Town. I spent my days catching Weedles and Caterpie and just wandering Viridian Forest. This whole world of glitch pokemon and all the bizarre things to come out of it . . . this strange reality I stumbled into, it’s well beyond anything I would have even imagined. And it carried me further than I ever would have thought.
I know, I’m just rambling now. I’ll stop. I know we still have a lot of work to do-- now more then ever. Now that we’ve revealed to the world the truth about glitch pokemon, they need us to help explain and understand them. It will be a massive change for everyone.
And this all started because I couldn’t stop wondering what hid in the grass beyond the fence in Pallet Town. It’s funny, really. Now that I know the answers, I just feel . . . more excited then ever.
All-Glitch Pokemon Blue Run Pt10: Creating Hybrids
June,
To answer your first question, yes, the headaches are likely related to Superglitch, but you need not worry about them. It’s a side effect, but because you followed my steps closely, we’ve done our best to mitigate those effects. If you notice your name no longer shows up on your Glitchdex, er, don’t worry about it.
To answer your second question, you are almost ready to meet your new glitchmon. First, however, I suggest you pay a visit to the Daycare Center. A few of your party pokemon might be slightly mutated from the effects of Superglitch. Don’t worry, though-- the Daycare Center man is an old friend of mine and fellow glitchmon researcher. If you leave them in his care he can nurse them back to health, for a small fee.
Finally, I strongly recommend healing at the Pokecenter before doing anything else. This step is very important if you want to save data on your Glitchdex. Ah, it’s a long explanation as to why that is, but trust me, it helps reboot the system so things function normally again.
After all of that, you now will be ready to meet your new glitchmon friends!
---
Professor,
All right, I completed your directions and then Teleported back to Lavander Town. When I withdrew the new glitchmon, though, I uhhhh . . . ran into a bit of a problem. I immediately lost the pokeball.
I searched in a panic for like ten minutes before finding it. I’m not sure how I was so careless. Then I let the glitchmon out of the ball.
It . . . looks like it’s just a Charizard? I don’t get it. I mean, don’t get me wrong, Charizard is really cool, but I thought this was supposed to be a glitchmon. At any rate, I named it Charmed.
She seems awfully shy, actually. I turned around for just a second and looked back and she was just GONE. It took me several minutes to find her again. You’d think it would be pretty difficult to lose a giant fire-breathing dragon, but apparently I’m talented.
-June
---
June,
What you have in your possession is no ordinary Charizard. That is Charizard ‘M, or glitchmon FF.
This species needs careful handling when in your party. It has a ‘cloaking’ ability somewhat similar to a Kecleon’s camouflage, although more extreme. Indeed, this cloak is so powerful it can hide even the Pokeball it resides in, as well as other pokemon in its immediate vicinity!
You’re also correct in noting it can be quite shy. It takes a long time to establish trust with this species, and they rarely trust the nurses at the Pokecenter. You may need to potion them by hand if they see any sort of battle.
I must give a word of caution, though; Charizard ‘M has also been known to accidentally induce mutations in pokemon nearby. Merely exposing pokemon to its presence is enough. Try to keep its pokeball a bit further away from the others, at the bottom slot in your party. You don’t want an accidental hybrid on your hands, after all.
-Professor Gingko
---
Professor,
I kinda wish you’d said something about that a little bit sooner. I had stopped to capture a Paras I’d found . . . and when I went to deposit things in the PC, uh. It was kind of disturbing. The Paras and my HM slave Kadabra had melted together. I wasn’t sure what to do. I thought maybe if I’d evolved . . . it, then that would force them apart, so I tried a few Rare Candies.
Didn’t really work, though? Now I just have a Parasect with all these strange moves.
-June
---
June,
For goodness’ sake. Well, all you’ve done is ensured they remain fused together as a hybrid, now that it’s gone and evolved. You’ve lost your Kadabra HM slave for good, I’m afraid. It became the recipient for the hybridization process. You can still normalize what’s left of the Paras, however. If you return to the Daycare man and give him the Paras-- which should be currently hybridized with Charizard ‘M-- he should be able to get it back to normal.
You’ll have to keep the Parasect as is, though.
-Professor Gingko
---
Professor,
Honestly? I’m ok with that. My new Parasect is pretty neat, and now is an even better HM slave then I had before. This Charizard ‘M has some cool abilities. I wonder what other bug hybrids I could make?
For now though, I’m keeping her at the bottom of my party, away from the other pokeballs. I’m taking along Wobbles, Fractal, Dustdevil, Giago and the new Charizard ‘M, and leaving Azure and Dirge in the PC for the moment.
Oh, and I spent some time exploring Celadon City at last. It was nice to finally do that. There’s some casino there that all the locals are talking about, so I gave that a visit. The games are actually pretty lame, but I’ve never liked gambling. I came across something weird, though-- there’s a basement to the casino. I went down there and it looks like the casino is just a screen for some underground illegal pokemon trafficking by a shady group of thieves. That's pretty wild.
The badguys weren’t too happy to see me there, but fortunately I could defend myself just fine with my team. It helped that I’d recently taught Ice Beam to Dusty. I also came across the Double Edge TM in that basement, so I taught it to Fractal, who now hits like a freaking meteor.
After a little more exploring, I came across the HM for Fly, but I learned I didn’t have the air clearance to actually use it for travel unless I’d earned Lt. Surge’s badge. For some odd reason? So . . . I had to backtrack all the way to Vermilion and defeat the guy. After that, I could teach Fly to my Missingno. and get around MUCH easier.
This let me fly back to Lavander Town. I made the trip because I’d picked up something interesting in Celadon-- a Silph Scope. I figured I should use it and take a tour of that creepy tower.
The trip taught me a lot about my team. The climb up the tower was a slow and difficult one. Starting off, I ran into Oak’s damned grandson again.
His team wasn’t bad to face, although his starter had evolved to Wartortle by now. Still, I had picked up a TM from Lt. Surge, so Wobbles had Thunderbolt now. It was an easy kill.
In general, Wobbles had no problem with any of Pokemon Tower. His Special is just sky-high. My other pokemon had to work a bit harder, though.
Gia is a defensive sort of poke. She’s not huge on offense, especially Special offense. But all her physical attacks were Normal type moves, which are useless against the ghosts. She was stuck chipping away at ghosts with her Surf, while the ghosts para-fused her. Fortunately she at least has so much bulk she sometimes came out on top of those fights. Gia’s fight style is all about long-term survival.
Meanwhile, Dusty struggled a fair bit because her stats are just not great in general. Despite that fact, she was scrappy and determined and could scrape by. Her speed also meant she could get in hits at vital times.
When paired together, Dusty and Gia could manage to take out the ghosts with teamwork. This was great, since Wobbles and my new Charizard ‘M had plenty of levels and didn’t need the XP at the time. My last pokemon on the team, Fractal, is the very definition of a glass cannon. Fractal could take pokemon out with his raw power, but only if he didn’t fall first. He was knocking himself out cold in a single hit if he got confused-- but he also sometimes knocked his foes out cold in a single hit. This is why I gave him Double Edge; his fighting style was hyper-offensive to an extreme.
After touring to the top of the tower, we took care of the local rowdy ghosts and some trainers rambling about something called ‘Team Rocket.’ I dunno, but the way they were dressed looked awfully similar to the creeps at the casino. Maybe they’re the same crew. I wasn’t paying much attention, to be honest.
There was an old man up in the tower who talked to me after my battles, though, and invited me back to his house. Normally I’d nope the heck out of that sort of situation, but he seemed harmless enough. . . and he gave me a flute as a gift. He tells me it can wake up any sleeping pokemon. I have the perfect pokemon in mind to test it on.
-June
---
Glitchdex #: FF/255
Family: Charizard Hybrid
Type(s): Fire/Flying
Species Keyword: CLOAK
This shy POKEMON is so good at disguise it can even fool highly trained POKECENTER nurses. It only trusts its trainer to heal and care for it.
---
End Notes
Glitches used/mentioned in this post:
* Making Superglitch useful
* Creating pokemon hybrids
* Charizard ‘M
* This Charizard ‘M was created by placing a normal Charizard named ‘Charmed’ in my sixth party slot and then using the controlled superglitch corruption mentioned in my last blog post. The Charizard ‘M that appeared in my seventh expanded party slot then inherented the ‘Charmed’ nickname once I deposited the first pokemon in my party into the PC.
Click for the next part of the series!
This is a repost on a new blog. The original post was on Nov 30, 2019.
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Excellent. Pokemon #233 is a fine choice. I hope you two get along nicely.
Your first task will be in Cerulean City. I need you to travel there. Specifically, I need you to investigate some suspicious sightings at Nugget Bridge. I know that Cerulean is a bit far from Pallet Town, but the trek will give you a chance to get to know your new friend.
I would like to advise you to only take your new glitchmon with you, however. In fact, in most cases it is best when traveling with glitchmon to not bring regular pokemon along. The regular pokemon are likely to become . . . distressed. So for the most part, unless absolutely necessary otherwise, please make this a glitchmon only journey.
I also advise you to keep careful notes of your trip and experiences and send me regular updates. The habit of detailed notetaking is largely what seperates a scientist from a layperson, and the sooner you get in the habit, the better.
My final point of advice is to avoid other trainers whenever you can. It's best to keep a low profile.
Good luck, Junebug.
-Professor Gingko
---
Professor Gingko,
All right. I’ll try and record everything that happens.
Actually, things started out a little awkwardly. I had only taken my first step on my new journey when suddenly Professor Oak was shouting at me to stop. He was worried wild pokemon would scratch my eyes out or something. He musn’t have realized I already had a pokemon, because he dragged me back to his research lab and started talking about making me his research assistant. I didn’t exactly have the heart to tell him I was already signed up to do that with someone else, so I just sort of smiled and nodded and played along. I would have gotten out of there pretty fast but unfortunately his annoying grandson had showed up, too, and wanted a pokemon battle. So, uh . . . yeah. We had our first fight! Don’t worry, though. I made sure Oak didn’t see my new glitchmon. We battled behind some bookshelves. Wobbles cleaned out his competition pretty darn fast with Aurora Beams and then we could finally be on our way.
Well, er, after running a quick errand for Oak in Viridian, that is. THEN we were on our way. I know Viridian forest like the back of my hand, so it wasn’t exactly difficult to get through there. Especially when I learned Wobbles has Fire Punch. I know you said to keep a low profile, but I swear it wasn’t on purpose. It just seemed like everyone wanted a battle that day. The good news is the battles were so short, nobody even had a chance to blink!
In Pewter, though, there was a really annoying fanboy of Brock’s who would not shut up about him. He kept badgering me to go visit him at the gym and try to battle him. I think if I tried hard enough, I COULD have pushed by this kid, but I figured it would be easier to just get the badge. Wobbles was obviously super powerful so it’s not like it would be hard for him.
Brock was a little confused when I let Wobbles out of his pokeball, but I told him it was an exotic bug pokemon a friend from some distant region had sent me, like the Galar region or something. He got pretty smug when he heard it was a bug type, and saw it was several levels lower than his team. What he didn’t expect were the Aurora Beams that wiped his pokes out in a single hit.
With Brock’s badge, that silly kid let me by no problem. But once I entered the route leaving Pewter behind, I ran into another problem.
I was fighting trainers in my way and Wobbles Skull Bashed. At first, I thought I’d accidentally told him to do the wrong thing. But next time, he disobeyed me again. He wasn’t always listening to my commands anymore.
This was . . . kind of spooky, considering I was about to enter Mount Moon. I needed to be able to rely on him. I entered the cave anyway and tried my best to avoid the trainers in there.
I was doing pretty good with that for a while, until I ran into some members of Team Rocket. That was kind of rough. We wiped out to one Rocket when his Rattata tail whipped a few times and Quick Attacked, and considering Wobbles already has almost zero defense, uhhh, yeah. Fortunately we got by the Rocket in a re-match. Near the end of the cave was some nerd really obsessed with fossils who wanted to fight us, but we managed to beat him too.
He let us keep one of his fossils as a prize. For some reason the Helix Fossil really called to me.
After that, we finally exited that dank cave and made it out into the sweet sunshine and the fresh air of Cerulean City. As I entered the Pokecenter, I noticed all the locals were chattering about some guy named Bill. They kept saying he loved rare pokemon. Boy, I wonder what he’d think of mine? I won’t show him, because I know you wouldn’t want me to, but I have to admit it’s tempting.
Anyway, I was headed up the Nugget Bridge to start my investigations, but for Pete’s sake, Oak’s obnoxious grandson ran into me again. What’s worse, he challenged me to a battle. I don’t know how I managed to take out his team of four with one, slightly underlevelled, disobedient pokemon, but mercifully Wobbles pulled through. It helped Wobbles has fantastic Special and Gary’s Squirtle was spamming water moves. It also helped that Wobbles actually used Aurora Beam on Pigeotto like I asked him to.
Gary left after I wiped the floor with his team, and I could carry on with exploring Nugget Bridge.
Unfortunately . . . the bridge was absolutely full of trainers. They were all standing out there in a row. I think they were having like a club meeting or something. They told me I had to beat them all to win a prize. I wasn’t exactly keen on fighting yet more trainers, but they were kind of in my way. So I worked my way through the entire lot of them. I had to heal in between each battle and Wobbles spent a lot of the time messing around, but we got through them in the end.
They gave me a gold nugget as a final prize, which was kind of nice since I was a bit strapped for cash. I figure I can pawn that thing. I really hope Wobbles gets his act together and starts obeying me again, though. I don’t exaclty know what’s gotten into him. Maybe he’s just tired?
Anyway, now that I’m here, what exactly should I be looking for?
-June
---
End Notes
The glitch I allude to that allows you to get past Brock’s fanboy and skip Brock’s gym is called Brock Through Walls.
Click for the Next Part of the Series!
This is a repost on a new blog. The original post was on Nov 21, 2019.
All-Glitch Pokemon Blue Run Pt16: Approaching Destiny
The following is a series of texts exchanged between the devices of Professor Gingko and his assistant, June, dated 8/15/97. This document is for the personal information and use of the designated recipiet only (i.e., “for your eyes only”). It is not to be shared.
P Gingko 3:34 pm
June? Are you still out working with D4 in the Mansion? You've been gone quite a long time now. I was hoping for a status report.
Junebug 3:46 pm
ya got sidetracked sorry
P Gingko 3:47 pm
Side-tracked doing what?
Junebug 3:49 pm
um
Junebug 3:49 pm
I'll tell you but promise you won't be mad, ok?
P Gingko 3:50 pm
I won't be mad as long as you don't give me a reason to be mad.
Junebug 3:52 pm
I'm sort of in Viridian City right now
Junebug 3:52 pm
and, uh, I just finished fighting the gym leader. did yoy know the Viridian Gym leader was Giovani?
P Gingko 3:53 pm
What on Earth possessed you to do this, June? Did I not *specifically* instruct you no more gym battles or trainer fights? You know we're trying to keep a low profile!
Junebug 3:53 pm
ok see you're getting mad
Junebug 3:53 pm
look, I had a reason
Junebug 3:54 pm
I heard on the news that the Viridian Gym was accepting challengers again, and somebody was speculating the leader of the gym was actually this giovani guy
Junebug 3:54 pm
and like it was acting as his sort of cover. you know, the dude who is in charge of team rocket? those losers who keep smuggling pokemon and stuff? and they were RIGHT, it totally was giovani
P Gingko 3:56 pm
I fail to see why this is relevent. What does it matter if the Gym leader is Giovani? You still shouldn't have challenged him, especially in front of so many witnesses.
Junebug 3:58 pm
because I stopped him! I stomped him flat with my glitch pokes and he was so confused and humiliated that he swore he couldnt even face team rccket anymore. he said he's disbanding the whole organization! look i knew somebody had to take the guy down a few pegs, and I was right, it worked.
P Gingko 4:00 pm
As commendable as that is, June, this sort of thing still is best left to the authorities to deal with. Let the police and investigators handle Team Rocket. It's not the job of a busy young lady who's assisting a glitch pokemon professor on very delicate research.
Junebug 4:02 pm
Isn't it, though?
P Gingko 4:02 pm
Isn't it what?
Junebug 4:05 pm
Look, Professor. I've been doing a lot of thinking lately. We've been spending months now researching these glitch pokemon. And you've spent YEARS doing it. All in super secrecy. Ever since they were discovered, its been in secret. youve been slaving away in the shadows, and all your colleagues just think youre some qwuak, some lunatic.
P Gingko 4:05 pm
The reminder is, in fact, not necessary. I'm well aware of how the academic community perceives me.
Junebug 4:06 pm
Don't you think it's about time we do something about that? We've learned so much and we have PLENTY of proof by now! We can go public about glitch pokemon and show the world what they've been missing. or misunderstanding.
P Gingko 4:08 pm
June, that's not for you to decide. The nature of our research is very important but also very sensitive. We're working with incredibly powerful forces. In the wrong hands, or if mishandled, glitch pokemon and glitch phenomenon can be devastating
Junebug 4:11 pm
Yeah but isn't that all the more reason to go forward with the truth? Sooner or later, some random person will stumble across glitches, just like I did. And who knows what will happen to them. But if we go forward and educate people, then, laws can be made, and people can learn about them, and we can all know how to deal with glitches properly.
Junebug 4:11 pm
and also people will realize we're not crazy!! you wont have to work in obscurity anymore. you can be a hero! recognized for your genius.
P Gingko 4:12 pm
Appealing to my sense of vanity won't work, you know.
Junebug 4:12 pm
its not really about the glory though, thats just a nice added bonus.
P Gingko 4:15 pm
June . . . it's not as though I have not considered these facts. I've thought about them for years. About when to go public, and how, and with what information. It is of course my ultimate goal to reveal what we've learned to the world. So that everyone can live safely and co-exist with these amazing creatures.
P Gingko 4:15 pm
But it's not as simple as just holding a press conference and proclaiming things to the world. There are so many factors to consider.
Junebug 4:17 pm
Maybe you'r over-complicating it, though. like, I had this great idea yesterday about how we can do it.
P Gingko 4:17 pm
I mean this with no offense, but I very much doubt that you've settled on a solution more sophisticated then my years of consideration has generated.
Junebug 4:19 pm
wait til you hear it before dismissing it, man
Junebug 4:19 pm
you're gonna love it
Junebug 4:19 pm
you ready to hear it?
P Gingko 4:20 pm
June.
Junebug 4:20 pm
ok so . . . .
Junebug 4:20 pm
I take my team of glitch pokemon and I beat the Elite 4 and become Pokemon Champion of the entire region.
Junebug 4:24 pm
Professor?
Junebug 4:26 pm
Professor, u still there?
Junebug 4:27 pm
c'mon man its a brilliant idea
P Gingko 4:30 pm
Get back to the lab. We're not discussing this.
Junebug 4:30 pm
Aw, cmon. What better way to prove to the whole world the power and reality of glitch pokemon? Nobody can call it phony after that, and nobody can deny them. Plus with the prestige of Championship we'll be in a position to put forth our important research and ideas on handling glitch pokes safely.
Junebug 4:40 pm
Professor, are you there?
P Gingko 4:48 pm
Get back to the lab.
P Gingko 4:48 pm
We can discuss it there.
—
(E-mail from one week later)
Professor,
This is the update you wanted about my journey through Victory Road. I know you’re still feeling hestitant even after all our long discussions about the plan. I hope this report can reassure you that this is going to go off without a hitch.
My first hurdle on the journey began before I could even take a single step on Victory Road. Professor Oak’s grandson had once again managed to track me down. It’s like that kid has a sixth sense for honing in on me and being annoying, I swear. He demanded a battle, so I complied.
Things were a cakewalk, but then, uhh. He sent out his Alakazam and it was . . . a lot stronger then before. By like, a lot.
He wiped my entire team. It was almost in an instant.
But that didn’t matter, because I’m no pushover trainer! Maybe I used to be, but these days I’ve learned an awful lot. So I dug into my supplies of TMs and found the perfect one. I taught Giago Thunder Wave.
During our rematch, Gia survived a hit and paralyzed the Alakazam. I knew the Zam had paltry Defense, so I sent out Fractal, who has amazing physical Attack. The Zam crumpled before us!
Things were a little tight with the final foe, a level 53 Blastoise, but my team chipped him down enough that Wobbles could easily finish the job. Not bad for a team sitting at around level 35.
With that annoying kid cleared out of the way, we headed to the caves known as Victory Road.
The journey wasn’t exactly a quick one, I’ll be honest. It took a lot of tromping around, getting lost, pushing rubble out of the way, and battling trainers that had alarmingly high-levelled pokemon. I eventually decided it would probably be best if we did a little extra training. It would make the trip a bit smoother.
So we trained, and we trained hard. Our goal was for everyone to reach level 40. Not too ambitious, just around 5 levels or so. For some, it was pretty easy. Wobbles had no problems, and Gia was packing Surf. Sure, Gia’s Special isn’t great, but it was still enough to take out the local Rock/Ground types in the cave. Jasper took slightly longer to work with, but with Earthquake and Hydro Pump, he still didn’t have much trouble.
Dusty was a bit harder to train. As you know, her stats have never been incredible . . . besides her speed, that is. But she had Bubblebeam, Ice Beam and Hydro Pump, so it actually wasn’t too bad; just a little more time-consuming.
Then there was Fractal. I’ve noted before that Fractal’s defenses (both of them) are the worst of the team’s, and frankly abysmal. So training him was certainly a challenge. I opted to wander the grasses just outside of the cave, beating on Dittos and Fearows and healing a TON. It took a while, but eventually, even Fractal rose through the ranks.
After Fractal, there was just Charmed left to train. It wasn’t too bad, considering how balanced Charm’s stats are. The only extra thing I needed to do was duplicate some Elixirs for Charmed. She still doesn’t trust Pokecenter nurses, so she’ll only accept heals from me. I even bought Charmed a little treat and taught her Fire Blast.
Of course, if I’d wanted to, I could have duplicated a crapton of Rare Candies and just fed them to my pokemon. But I wasn’t going to do that. After all, you told me eating too much candy isn’t healthy for pokemon, and besides, I knew they could prove themselves in battle.
And that they did. We finally cleared Victory Road’s twisted, confusing tunnels and made it outside to face the large, dominating building that housed the Elite Four.
All-Glitch Pokemon Blue Run Pt15: The Complete Glitchdex
June,
I really do wish you wouldn’t run off and fight gyms with your team. We’re supposed to keep a low profile, remember? It’s especially important with Blaine’s gym; we don’t need him realizing that there are glitch researchers living on his island, right under his nose. Still . . . I must admit I am pleased that you seem to be bringing out the full potential of your pokemon. The evolution of your C9 is terribly exciting news. Even I was not aware that the species evolved. It sounds as though the evolution may have occured due to its close friendship with Drowzee. No wonder C9 was so fond of the species. This merits deeper investigation sometime.
Speaking of exciting discoveries . . . that item I had you retrieve, 8F, is at the forefront of some breakthrough research. It is a piece of technology that holds incredible power. Please be sure that you handle it with the greatest of care, June. Although our research on 8F is still ongoing, for the moment it seems that the technology is capable of altering the very fabric of reality itself.
However, that object relies upon the energy of very specific pokemon to function. I cannot explain why; my current theory is that the energy patterns of particular pokemon species harmonize with 8F’s own energy. It’s incredibly precise. I have enclosed directions for you to assemble a very specific team of pokemon for this task. I also have given you a shopping list of items we will also need when using 8F. It will likely take you quite some time to gather all that is needed.
Take your time, and let me know when you’re finished. Then, we can begin our experiments: calling forth glitch pokemon species directly to us with the power of 8F.
-Professor Gingko
---
Professor,
OK. I think I got this right.
Onix is my first pokemon.
Pidgey is my second. There’s 24 PP left on Pidgey’s second move. I used one PP Up on Pidgey’s third move. I also made sure there’s 21 PP left on that third move.
Tentacool is my third pokemon.
Meowth is my fourth pokemon. Meowth has 36 PP left on his first move. He also has 24 PP left on his second move.
Hitmonlee is my fifth pokemon. His first move is Double Team, his second move is Double Kick, and his third move is Strength.
Gyarados is my sixth pokemon. He has exactly 233 Attack.
While I was working on gathering up all these pokemon, I mentioned to your colleague, the Daycare Man, what I was up to. He offered to help me test out 8F once I was finished. He said I should capture some special bird pokemon in the Power Plant and then head over to him to see if we could clone it.
It ended up working out great! So we must be doing good, huh?
-Junebug
---
June,
Excellent work. But don’t allow my colleague to distract you with his cloning experiments. While it can be very useful, we’re onto something much, much bigger at the moment.
Now, I need you to obtain these items, and in this precise order:
1.) A Masterball
2.) The 8F
3.) Two-hundred and fifty-five (255) Repels
4.) Fourteen (14) X Speeds
5.) Sixty-four (64) Ultra Balls
6.) Seventy-two (72) TM05s
7.) Two-hundred and one (201) Lemonades
Let me know when your shopping is complete.
-Professor Gingko
---
Professor,
It worked!! My boxes are now crammed full of glitch pokemon! I spent all afternoon using 8F to summon them. You’re not going to know where to even begin with your research, now!
-Junebug
---
The following is a data archive downloaded from a lab computer on Cinnabar Island.
Please keep this information classified.
Professor Gingko’s Complete Glitchdex
Note: This Pokedex is organized numerically by the glitch pokemon’s family number. It moves from the highest family number to the smallest family number. Thus, there are two numbers to keep in mind for a glitch pokemon: its family number and its individual species number.
Dex Entry: This Pokémon is so dangerous that anyone attempting to capture it has never survived the encounter. The few that have been confined to Pokéballs have been captured entirely remotely.
Dex Entry: Although it is cute and harmless-looking, this little Pokémon actually has a very vicious bite if threatened. It knows few moves in the wild, but if trained well it can learn many special moves.
Dex Entry: It generates wind speeds so great, trainers sometimes are knocked out from the force. When they wake, they often find loose change and items have been blown from their pockets.
Dex Entry: The storm that this pokémon generates can last for hundreds of years. When the storm finally dies down, it is believed this pokémon evolves into Missingno.
Dex Entry: There are reports of old church statues sometimes transforming into strange birds and flying away. These stories describe demons trying to escape into heaven.
Dex Entry: This dark, disfigured creature seems to be made of some kind of living rock. It can blast water from its mouth, possibly because it once was a water fountain statue.
Dex Entry: This tiny pokémon is incredibly tough, able to survive extremely hot and cold temperatures, radiation, drought, and even the vacuum of space.
Dex Entry: This tiny pokémon is smaller than a paramecium. It lays its eggs inside the eggs of larger species, taking advantage of the nutrition for its young.
Dex Entry: A lives in old, dusty places, feeding on microscopic fragments of food and converting dust and dirt into energy. When disturbed, this pokémon is quick to flee.
Dex Entry: At times, a trainer will feel confused or hallucinate after battling with h. It is thought that h secrets toxins when stressed that can cause this.
Dex Entry: One of its greatest foes is Pidgey. Facing one can cause it to panic so greatly that it tramples its trainer. It is unknown why it fears Pidgey so greatly.
Alternative entry:
Its true appearance has never been reported, but it is believed this glitchmon is made of a substance stronger than diamond.
Dex Entry: Although rarely encountered in the wild, it has a habit of stealing items from trainers and carrying them around. It sometimes replaces the items it steals with new ones from its hoard.
Dex Entry: In ancient times, there were Eight Birds of Kanto that the people looked to for guidance and support. This pokémon was the deity of love and friendships.
Dex Entry: This ancient bird now rests deep underground. It once was celebrated by the people of Kanto as the deity of travel. Travelers would often carry small charms in the shape of this creature.
Dex Entry: An ancient pokémon that has burrowed underground to hibernate in modern times. The people of Kanto once worshipped it as a deity of health, praying to it for recovery from illness.
Dex Entry: Once a powerful bird that could blot out the sun with its wingspan, this pokémon has since burrowed into the ground to rest. It was considered a deity of music and art, and sang a tune that was said to inspire all who heard.
Dex Entry: Considered to be one of the Eight Birds of Kanto, this pokémon used to be a patron deity of fertility and abundant crops. People used to leave offerings of their finest berries to this pokémon.
Dex Entry: This pokémon was once treated as a god in ancient times. The guardian of wisdom and knowledge, people would consult this pokémon when they needed advice or help with their studies.
Dex Entry: This pokémon appears to be a distorted, tiny human, although it lacks any sort of face. Despite its size it is immensely strong, able to crush boulders with a single kick.
Dex Entry: It is believed this pokémon can be grown in a small glass jar by fermenting a fine powder of ground evolution stones. The tiny creature moves very slowly but has a punch that can shatter any material.
Dex Entry: Its drilling far exceeds the speeds of an Onix, tearing through the ground at a supernatural rate. When it consumes enough rock, this fearsome beast evolves into the landslide pokémon, PokémonPokémonT.
Dex Entry: It forms close friendships with other ghost pokémon, especially Gengar. It is thought trainers experienced with Gengar can befriend this pokémon much more easily.
Alternate:
It loves to sing and has dozens of different cries, some of them lasting for hours. Experienced trainers can judge its mood depending on the cry it uses.
Dex Entry: Its ancestor was the product of a pokémon trade gone terribly wrong, and now it has established itself as a new species. It moves by dragging itself along with its malformed limbs, and when it attacks it flops back and forth, kicking furiously.
Dex Entry: When two trainers were trading a Dodrio for a Bulbasaur over their PCs, the data was corrupted and something went terribly wrong. The two pokémon fused and this twisted creature was the result.
Dex Entry: When a Magnemite is feeding on electricity, a power surge can disrupt it. It no longer can develop naturally and instead exists in a glitched state.
Dex Entry: After accidentally absorbing a power surge, this Magnemite began to behave very erratically. It is prone to shrieking loudly, using bizarre moves and even exploding.
Dex Entry: A once-docile Slowpoke will sometimes rapidly transform into a malformed, aggressive pokémon. It is thought that the cause is a glitch pokémon that bites Slowpoke's tail.
Dex Entry: It seems to be related to Tentacruel, but it lives in incredibly deep waters. It is believed that the intense environment of the deep sea led this pokémon to adapt in strange ways, resulting in some very unexpected moves.
Dex Entry: It has a strange fascination with Moon Stones and often collects and carries them around. The steady exposure to the stone's radiation seems to sometimes cause L ゥM 4 to evolve into pokémon associated with the moon.
Dex Entry: There is an old story about the great Fertility God, PkMnaPkMnゥ ♂ fPkMnk, who had watched over the crops and wildlife for many hundreds of years. When this Pokémon's work was finally done, it evolved into a creature very similar to a Poliwrath, to spend its days lazily swimming the seas.
Dex Entry: While staring at Poliwhirl's belly can simply make you drowsy, staring at ゥL ゥM 4's belly seems to be more dangerous. It can cause dizziness and confusion, and there have even been reports of trainers fainting.
Dex Entry: $WPKMN normally sings a slow, beautiful song, remembering tunes from the places it has traveled. However, when it's in battle, it gives a loud, rattling cry that some say sounds like a machine gun.
Dex Entry: Although it seems to carry powerful toxins in its body, it has lost the ability to deliver that poison with its horn. No matter how hard it tries to jab, the deadly poisons remain locked inside it.
Dex Entry: It generally prefers to immobilize its prey before attacking. Somehow, it can evolve into either Hypno or Lickitung, and in both cases, it still chooses to paralyze or hypnotize its prey.
Dex Entry: This intimidating pokemon appears to be some type of deformed snake, possibly related to Arbok. When disturbed, this creature seems to expand its chest and then expel air with ferocious intensity. It has even been known to shoot water or objects like coins in a similar manner.
Dex Entry: Although at first it appears to be just a regular Rattata, it is capable of things a normal Rattata is not, such as spraying poison. It is believed if this pokémon's full potential is developed, its strength could rate in the top percentage of Rattata.
Dex Entry: Although its appearance is misshapen, it seems to be some kind of colossal bird. Some people who have spotted it report it has a long, flowing tail that stretches for miles and a sharp horn atop its head.
Dex Entry: This enormous bird has a rare song that has only been heard by a few. The melody is very chaotic and beautiful, but the song may be a warning that this pokémon is about to attack.
Dex Entry: This enraged Beedrill has managed to snap the barbs on its forelegs, but it has adapted by learning many powerful punching techniques. It is still important to stay cautious, as the stinger on its abdomen still works perfectly.
Dex Entry: This shy pokémon is so good at disguise it can even fool highly trained Pokécenter nurses. It only trusts its trainer to heal and care for it.
Alternate entry:
Although harmless to humans, simply being near Charizard'M can cause other pokémon to mutate.
Dex Entry: People say that Missingno. is an omen that brings great wealth to those who spot it. Others believe it is a bad omen that spells disaster for trainers challenging the Elite Four.
Dex Entry: These mysterious creatures are thought to be the spirits of long-dead pokémon. Most of their memories are faded, so they often mimic the form and knowledge of other pokémon.
