#gisellexyou

✰She didn’t even confess to you, she just…never left

✰After hanging out a few times, suddenly she’s on your couch, hogging the blanket, stealing your snacks like she pays rent, calling you “babe” like you’ve been married for years

✰When you try to clarify, she shoves a chicken nugget in your mouth and says, “shh, my partner wouldn’t ask silly questions.”

✰You will never stop laughing. From sarcasm, witty comments, or anything under the sun, Giselle has a unique talent of making you break down with laughter

✰She’s a walking contradiction. One minute she quotes Nietzsche, the next she’s singing SpongeBob songs in whatever accent tickles her fancy

✰“I’m actually really deep,” She says, while wearing mismatched socks and a hoodie that says “I cry during tax season.”

✰Her texts are either novels or a single emoji

✰Does not know how to send a normal selfie. You ask for a selfie, you get 12 angles of her chin + a voice memo of her screaming as she gets chased by Ning for pranking her again

✰Well, it’s that or a picture of her face too close to the camera with the caption, “mlem”

✰Sends you voice note that starts with “I miss you.” Ends with her choking on her drink, kicking the table that she tripped over, then complaining that her foot hurts

✰Will FaceTime you from the floor, under a blanket, whispering, “I am the sadness burrito. Validate me.”

✰Constantly tries to convince you that she’s the normal one

✰“Babe you’re being weird.” (She’s wearing sunglasses indoors and talking to the toaster)

✰Drops random philosophy in the middle of watching SpongeBob

“Do you ever think Squidward represents late-stage capitalism?” “Babe it’s 1AM.” “Exactly. Squidward’s probably still working.”

✰As a girlfriend, she’s actually very thoughtful, remembering the smallest stuff about you. Like you mention a favourite snack as a kid, and boom, she tracks it down on some random site

✰She loves physical touch but refuses to admit it.

✰She’ll come sit next to you and be like, “Move, it’s cold.” When she’s doing that literally just so she can hold your hand

✰Loves lying on top of you like a human blanket. Claims it’s for “warmth regulation.” Lies. It’s because she’s clingy

✰Will never admit that she’s clingy, but then try to throw hands if you leave the bed without warning.

“Where are you going?” “The bathroom.” “Wow, okay, just abandon your wife, I see how it is.”

✰Her petnames start ironically.

“Come on snuggle muffin” “Don’t you sass me, toasty nugget.”

✰She eventually forgets that it was ironic. You’re now her toasty nugget, permenantly.

✰She likes to roast you but if anyone else tries to do it? 

“Haha, you’re kinda dumb-HEY WHAT DID YOU SAY DO YOU WANT TO DIE?”

✰Challenges you to dance battles in empty parking lots

✰Will drag you into them, and doesn’t care if you’re good

“It’s just for the vibes babe.”

✰She insists on pushing the cart at the grocery store and then rides it like a knight riding a horse into battle. You pretend not to know her.

✰When at the grocery store, she gets into frequent arguments with you about which pasta has the most “sexy energy”. 

✰She shows love in a way only Giselle could. She sends you memes, bullies you, engulfs your life in physical chaos, then once in awhile, while she’s lying on your chest or like resting on your shoulder, she whispers, “Hey…just so you know, I really love you. You’re my favourite person so like, don’t blow up.”

✰Then she immediately follows it up with a fart noise then runs away. While laughing at her fart noise.