#gegetsuburi

Height differences, Zanpakuto Rebellion Arc

I am going to try to make this one shorter. We are past the Rukia and Renji fights, so maybe I can find it within myself to not analyze everything that happens to death. Ha ha, ganbatte, Polynya!

Following Renji and Ichigo’s successes at winning back their zanpakutou, everyone decides to go out and just get their zanpakutou back. At one point, my husband was like, “everyone’s using kidou, huh?” and I replied, “Yes, well, when Renji has managed to subdue his zanpakutou with kidou, it seems like a pretty good strategy.”

Speaking of people who like to copy Renji, Byakuya mysteriously breaks into the archives and knocks out every single guard he finds. I feel strongly that he was incredibly jealous of the time Renji beat up every single person in Squad 6 while busting out of prison, and has been looking for an opportunity to do the same.

Omaeda, consummate professional, wanders by and his men are like “Hey, there’s some unconscious people here?” There’s no time to do any actual investigating, though, because Gegetsuburi and Houzukimaru are here!

What deep character things will we learn as Omaeda confronts his zanpakutou? 

Omaeda loves Gegetsuburi’s style.

Gegetsuburi tells Omaeda he is hideous and terrible.

Gegetsuburi transforms his bag of rice crackers into his weapon

Ichigo and Ikkaku crash through a wall and accidentally knock Omaeda out

Thank you, Zankautou Rebellion Filler Arc, this was tremendous. Perfect character study. ::chef’s kiss.::

Ichigo defeats Gegetsuburi in about ten seconds and they… send him off to Squad 12 to be experimented on?? Soi Fon is 100% on board with this?? Uhhhhh okay? 

Meanwhile, Ikkaku is extremely excited to fight Houzukimaru. They do the lucky dance together. I don’t think they even have a beef with each other. Why isn’t this entire arc just Ikkaku fighting Houzukimaru? They are so happy. I love this journey for them. Anyway, their fight gets interrupted and Houzukimaru gets away with the help of… Byakuya? GASP!

(Programming note: Ikkaku didn’t make it onto the chart this week because there were too many other characters. Clearly, this fight is gonna pick up again later, so I’ll add him then.)

The other subplot going on at this time is that Tobiume and Haineko are a) both way horny for Hyourinmaru and b) hate each other and call each other by a bunch of gross insults rooted in misogyny. I suppose this is meant to be funny, but it’s terrible and I hate it. 

In the next episode, they attack Ichigo in the woods (where are these woods anyway?? In the middle of the Seireitei? Is there, like, a Central Park?) and… sexually harass him? Ichigo is like, “I am 16 years and I cannot tell you enough how much I would like to be removed from this narrative.”

Fortunately Hinamori and Matsumoto show up and are like, “Buzz off, kid, we take care of our own messes.” The next half an episode is extremely painful. Haineko calls Matsumoto an old hag. Female characters in Bleach are constantly calling Matsumoto an old hag and… it’s stupid? First of all, she doesn’t actually age??? Wouldn’t this have entirely different connotations in Soul Society? Second, Matsumoto looks great and she pulls. If she is old… it doesn’t seem to be slowing her down much? Fortunately, Matsumoto seems utterly immune to this, both here and the time the Tres Bestia tried to pull this on her.

Meanwhile, Tobiume tells Hinamori that she is pathetic and makes poor life decisions and that it was painful to have to be with her through her depression and I AM SO MAD ABOUT THIS. Earlier in this arc, Hinamori talked a lot about how important Tobiume’s emotional support had been to her recovery. This is like if you showed up to therapy and your therapist was like, “Yeah, I’ve been thinking it over and I think you deserve your trauma and are not worthy of basic human love.” They couldn’t even be bothered to show Tobiume with some cognitive dissonance over this, this is TERRIBLE and YOU DESERVE BETTER, HINAMORI. Tobiume is cancelled. 

Anyway, both Matsumoto and Hinamori appear to be getting pissed off, and they start to cast some kidou, full chant and everything, which their zanpakutou dodge easily and laugh at them… because they were each aiming at each other’s zanpakutou. 

That’s right. My two queens rolled in with a plan, ignored their dumb zanpakutou’s psychological games, and tag-teamed them, no muss, no fuss. They high-fived. Hinamori gives a speech about how being old is lit, actually, because you know what you’re about and you’re better for the heartache you’ve been through. It ruled. Go get some margaritas and mani-pedis, girlfriends. You deserve it for dealing with this horseshit. This is the most feminist Bleach has ever been, and I am 100% sure it was an accident.

Ichigo leaves the forest of Toxic Performative Femininity and runs into Hyourinmaru who promptly goes “Are… you my master?” 

OH NOOOOOOOOES Hyourinmaru has forgotten the face of his master!!! I cannot emphasize enough how sad and ridiculous this is. Did Muramasa not vette his brainwashed zanpakutou at all before sending them out into the world? There is no explanation whatsoever for why Hyourinmaru has lost his memories and no one else has. Even worse, he is talking to a young man with face blindness and a bad memory and Ichigo is like “I… don’t know?” We made fun of Ichigo a bunch for not knowing what any of his friends’ powers are, because Hyourinmaru, like, so obviously belongs to Hitsugaya, but maybe Ichigo’s never seen Hitsugaya’s powers? I’ve talked before about how the filler gives us the impression that everyone hangs out and knows each other really well, but I don’t think Ichigo has ever canonically seen Hitsugaya’s powers, so that’s kinda fun.

Anyway, Hyourinmaru is very Extra. Got some rotating ice dragons, very Actual Cannibal Shia LaBeouf. Hitsugaya shows up, all “I… am your master,” except that Hyourinmaru is like, “no, you are a child.” Amazingly, this is not played for laughs. Hitsugaya asks him, very dramatically “What does your soul want?” and Hyourinmaru answers, “a…home” aaaaaaand it’s a one-way trip to flashback town, baby! We’re back in good ol’ Junrinan with Babby Toushirou, and I swear to God this happened:

There some bean-buying and meeting Matsumoto and freezing Granny and… then Hitsugaya… leaves home? Momo is nowhere in this? What does this have to do with home? Is it… because they repurposed a canon flashback that doesn’t belong here? Could be! 

It doesn’t matter. Empowered by nostalgia, Hitsugaya is able to unseal his sword (so, that’s him and Renji now who have been able to look their zanpakutou dead in the eyes and do this, good jorb, guys) they fight, Hitsugaya yells “REMEMBER YOUR HOOOOOOOOME” and Hyourinmaru remembers, they hug it out, end scene.

Oh, in other news, Muramasa has been in Hueco Mundo, killing Menos?? I’m sure absolutely nothing bad will come of this.

CHART UPDATE!

Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!

For a moment there I thought the chain was around Renji... But let's be honest, he wouldn't mind if it was.

Guess they ran out of episodes for all the silhouettes.