#gatekeeping -

and im tired of seeing non-binary erasure. i’m tired of seeing people claim pronouns are gendered. they are not. do certain sets get correlated to one gender or the other in a massive way? yeah. but let’s work to undo that. everyone should get to be comfortable with their identities. let men use she/her and women use he/him. let nonbinary people use both. let people use none. let’s let everyone pick what makes them feel best and honor that? why wouldn’t we want that...

i also think that it is inaccurate to say that people in lgbt groups are incapable of enacting oppression on others, even on aros and aces, because the point i was making is that pretty much Everyone is capable of oppressing Some other groups, because theres not gonna be someone who is the Most Oppressed in every capacity possible. and even if there were, you would still have the issue of internalized prejudice to grapple with. its not as simple as ‘people in x group Cant be oppressive, the word is discriminatory‘

i didnt think anyone was denying that,, but in the same vein as how the community accepts people of varied races or ability or class or anything else, that doesnt. preclude someone from being able to have a lived experience thats different from what society deems acceptable??

it means, like in any community whatsoever, that you have to be careful and watch for how those experiences could inform how you behave, how you treat people. but those intersections of privilege and oppression arent new to us, even coming from within our groups. its the same as how a cis person is still able to say shitty things to a trans person, regardless of the various orientations involved. being not straight doesnt exempt you from saying transphobic things, and being aro or ace doesnt exempt you from saying homophobic things, but i dont see a point in excluding either group :(