#future poop

Ohio State fans are pissed that their coach did some shady ass bullshit, but lets be honest, we're really not all that upset.  If this kills their entry into one of the stronger Michigan programs, whatever...for whatever reason, Michigan is a shit state when it comes to high school football talent.  Buckeye fans are pissed because it makes our golden god coach look less awesome.  That's literally the only reason.

But I'm really, really, really trying hard to understand why Michigan fans would be miffed at all.

Let's look at the angles here...

1.  Weber committed to Ohio State.  Therefore, he is not involved with the Michigan program in any fashion.

2.  I get the jilted lover angle...but what logical reason would an RB who's "scared of competition" choose go to Ohio State, as the common sentiment amongst mgoblog commenters seems to be?  The answer certainly isn't some anonymous 3* kid who wasn't even on the radar a week earlier scaring him off.

3.  This provides tremendous ammunition against Ohio State in recruiting moving forward.  If anything, this is a positive for your program as something like this will no doubt scare the shit out of a bunch of kids and give Meyer's pitches a shakier foundation.  

4.  Weber's school, Cass Tech, was always a Michigan pipeline that Michigan's two chief rivals started tapping into, and now one of those programs' access is likely cut off.

Meanwhile, there are rumors about of an attorney offering his services pro bono to file a wrongful solicitation lawsuit in order to get Weber out of his LOI and allow him to re-open his recruitment.  His options aren't great...and it's highly unlikely that Ohio State would just let him out of his committment like that*.

*The hypocrisy is rife and this year we're seeing a few things that could signal a larger movement, in that the top recruits, instead of signing a LOI, will instead sign up for financial aid.  As it stands now, the LOI scheme is basically a player signing away his rights to that school, and we've seen shadiness already this offseason both at Ohio State as well as at UCLA, where their defensive coordinator's flirtation with the Atlanta Falcons might cost them one of the best linebacking prospects in the country.  

By signing up for financial aid, the player is essentially skilling the LOI as "middle man" and going right to the point.  However, say a coach that recruit's built up a relationship with bolts...then he's not bound to that program as he would be if he signed an LOI.  Back to Michigan...

The reaction to file a lawsuit on a kid's behalf because of a coach leaving is fucking silly.  There's no better way to put it.  As much of a shady ass tactic as this was (there's no way in hell Drayton didn't know he was gone), the fact remains that Weber had AMPLE opportunities to commit back to Michigan if that's where his heart really was before National Signing Day, and even then, he was under no pressure to sign that day...he could've delayed his commitment until April.

There's really no defending Drayton and Urban Meyer's bullshit here.  It's nothing that'll take the shine off a championship or have the NCAA start snooping around, but it's bullshit nonetheless.  

But this in no way involves the Michigan football program in any way.  A relationship with a position coach was not the reason to make a commitment like this, and, you know what...

...it's been a long-ass time since I hated Michigan, but god fucking damnit they've been back all of two months and I remember just why they're so loathsome. 

I remember when all the Ohio State and Urban Meyer shit started to go down and it wasn't exactly our finest hour as a fanbase, but it was arrogance that bordered on being a joke.  It was assumed that this was going to happen and, well, it was easy as shit to get cocky considering just how fucking lucky this program got in the wake of an NCAA scandal...

But this whole Harbaugh IT'S HAPPENING thing was pure desperation.  It was never a sure thing.  It was a last ditch effort.  If it didn't happen, the program would almost assuredly resemble a volcano about to erupt.  And when Harbaugh came strolling into town, to an outsider it looked like a pity fuck.  Like a "hey remember how hot we were back in college?  Howabout one last fling for good ol' times?" cockworn three-time divorcee at her 20th reunion...ya just aint as hot as you used to be.

It was just so desperate.  Pathetic.  Grovelling, sycophantic, drones exhibiting NOT the exact same type of leader worship as the fanbases they purport to lord over ethically and morally, because they took it to such an extreme, in such a short amount of time it makes Ohio State fans' relationship with Urban Meyer seem healthy and in-perspective.

Is part of my emotional reaction due to fear?  ABSOLUTELY.

Harbaugh's a damn good coach.  Damn good.  There are three other coaches I'd take over Jim Harbaugh...Nick Saban, Urban Meyer and Steve Spurrier.  And I'd only take Steve Spurrier so we could play at Augusta and I could listen to him talk shit all day, click clack...

And Harbaugh's absolutely in that same category of coach that makes you hate him with every fiber of your being, but you can't do anything but begrudgingly respect the guy's abilities.  I'm not going to sit here and say the fact he's never won a national championship or Super Bowl detracts for a second from his acumen as a football coach.  In fact, if you asked me three separate times to draw the archetypal college football coach, I would draw Nick Saban, Urban Meyer and Jim Harbaugh.

But I'd draw Harbaugh as a caricature because that's what he is.  This whole IM GOING TO ATTACK TODAY WITH ENTHUSIASM UNKNOWN TO MANKIND is such a flaming turdpile of a quote, it makes me hate his dumb dumb face and his dumb dumb khakis ever more.  

In fact, I'd argue we should've nominated that tweet as our Derpity of the Week Hall of Fame next to Cliff (@bigreddreck btw fwiw /winkwink)...

You want "ENTHUSIASM UNKNOWN TO MANKIND?"  Howabout a fucking psychopath so driven to win instead of headbutting a tackling drill or whatever Rudy-esque bullshit Harbaugh's likely to do, you step over a convulsing player because he can't help you win?  Or cutting a kid who just played big minutes in your national championship win (Ohio State CB Armani Reeves) over "concussions" because two new blue-chip recruits signed that you didn't expect to and you need the roster space?  

Is that shit dirty as fuck?  HELL YEA.  Is that enthusiasm unknown to mankind?

Because most of mankind wouldn't be cold, ruthless assholes.  

But this isn't Ohio State or Alabama we're talking about.  These two fanbases have a reputation for a reason...we do not give a fuck about cheating or claiming national championships awarded by the Farmers Credit Union Quarterly Newsletter from 1933 or cutting a kid because he sucks.  Yea, we're douchebags, BUT THEY DON'T GIVE OUT NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIPS FOR NOT CHEATIN' PAWWWLLL.

Michigan, however, prides itself on doing things the right way.  They pride themselves on being above the board and morally superior and this hilarious image of being THE BEST and the WINNINGEST OF ALL TIME.

But kings don't bend that knee son.  Kings don't grovel and desperately pray and put all their eggs in one basket...and that's what's bothered me so much about this Michigan renaissance.  Because, yea, it's a legit renaissance...if you don't think that program's back in the conversation within three years, I'm sorry, you're wrong...but because it's upped the decibel level again.

I'm sick of hearing "you're just scared of Harbaugh" because that's bullshit.  Yea, he's a great coach, but I still got one of those nutjobs I mentioned above and you always take a Machiavelli over a meathead zealot.  I'm sick of hearing Michigan fans crow and poke their nose in the affairs of a player that turned them down on multiple occasions because they're lovesick.

It's fucking obnoxious.  It'd be obnoxious if they were a successful program, but they're not and, even though Harbaugh's a great coach and the roster has a sneaky amount of talent on it, they haven't actually done shit yet.  They're, under no definition of the term, the cock of the walk and there's nothing more obnoxious than seeing someone strut around that hasn't gotten their face punched in a few times.  

Makes you wanna punch their face in a few times, you know?