Stop trying toĀ āconvinceā them
Logic and dementia donāt mix. What does that mean? It really means that using logic to āexplain yourselfā to someone with dementia wonāt work out well. So, saying to someone with dementia, āBut you canāt eat lunch, because you already ate lunchā wonāt compute. They donāt remember eating, they still feel hungry, and they think youāre making it up!
And then what happens? You fight. No one wins, and everyone is mad.
Donāt convince. Just EMBRACE THEIR REALITY.
āI want my pills,ā Molly said. āCan you bring me my pills?ā she asked a nearby staff member.
āI already brought them to you, you had your pills this morning,ā the staff member replied kindly.
āNo I didnāt, I want my pills now,ā Molly shook her head.
āBut I already gave them to youā¦ā the staff member started.
āHang on,ā I offered, walking over. āI have a solution,ā I said to the staff member.
āHey, Molly, Iām going to bring you your pills in a little bit!ā I smiled.
āOkay, thanks,ā Molly said, and went back to eating her lunch.
Instead of arguing or attempting to use logic with this resident, I embraced her reality. Trying to āconvinceā her that she already took her medicine wasnāt going to work: she didnāt remember doing it, and so it didnāt happen.
I decided to get into her world and tell her the truth of her reality: that sheād be getting her pills soon. Of course, I never brought them to her, but hearing a positive confirmation calmed her down immediately.
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