#from jasper

bad enough to justify all this hurt.

threats instead of insults.

fists instead of words.

abuse instead of neglect.

i wish they were worse.

i wish i could be angrier.

i wish i could tell these stories and hear

"oh my god"

"that's horrible"

"i can't believe that happened to you"

instead of

"you know, they do it because they love you"

"but they do so much for you. you should be grateful"

"that's not really trauma, is it?"

i think about bad things happening to me.

horrible things.

i can't tell if i'm afraid or if i'm

enjoying it

there's something wrong with me.

i deserved it. i deserved worse.