Bedtime thought #1
Going to sleep now with the idea that Martin's bulge is so insurmountable he can't do up the bottom button of his shirt to fit over his jeans 🍆🍆🍆
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Bedtime thought #1
Going to sleep now with the idea that Martin's bulge is so insurmountable he can't do up the bottom button of his shirt to fit over his jeans 🍆🍆🍆

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Phil contemplates the meaning of life…and I will never be able to unsee this now (thanks to @yellowmiche for the reference!)
Seeing some old interviews of Martin, it's funny that in describing the stocking type thing actors use to cover their cocks in nude scenes, most other actors I've heard use the term "sock" 🧦
Meanwhile, Martin calls it a "purse" 👜👛 like idek 👀👀👀
When you basically live your life with freecrotch goggles (this blog ain't called freemanswood for nothing lol), and just that one time you're happily and innocently watching him fixing his hair in that last reblog, but then you check the comments
Bedtime thought #3
The Oxford dictionary should define "cocky" with a gif of Martin's big dick walk 👍

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Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
*david attenborough voice* And here, within the first few shots of this multimillion dollar blockbuster film teaser trailer, we bear witness to The Freecrotch in its natural habitat, nonchalant yet roused in the midst of tense interrogation.
Phil Rask and his Swagger/Big Dick Walk™ in Startup Ep 7 Valuation (540px*3mb)
All I Googled was “Martin Freeman penis” and I’m just dying rn I xD (source)
(*figures apparently calculated based on name lmao)