#foster licensing

“No”, laughed the manager of the window screen warehouse, “you can’t install them from the inside.”

One month, hundreds of dollars for an enormous ladder and untold dread later, J is resolved. We will start on window screens today.

While I’m gnashing my teeth and clawing at the walls, he checks one of the screens from inside, to make sure it’s the right one for the window. It pops right in. From the inside.

Whuuut?

We start opening windows and grabbing screens, running through the house, waiting for our luck to fail. It almost did on the VERY LAST SCREEN.

They’re all in. Less than an hour. No ladder.

The ladder was still packed up and we start to try to move it to the basement. “I’m not good at spacial relations or anything” I say, “but this is not going to work.” We spent almost as much time trying to get the ladder into the basement as we did putting in the screens.

Finally we called it and are returning the ladder, probably minus $120 of delivery fees.

BEST FRIEND, E: BFE

HER OLDEST CHILD: N1 (for Nephew 1)

HER (SLIGHTLY YOUNGER) CHILD: N2

When we bought this house, we bought it with my best friend, BFE. She and I grew up here in hometown, although we were not friends until I was living elsewhere.

Now that N1 is graduating high school at the end of this week, and the movers are at their house this morning packing their truck, I feel like they’re officially on their way home as of now!!!

I have lived with these three previously. While J is close to them, I had not yet met him when we all last lived together.

Our foster licensing process has to include BFE and N1 passing background checks when they get here. N2 has aways yet until he’s of age to require a background check.

BFE is a Childrens Librarian. She is my external spine, and I love her like, not like chosen family even. More like Demanded Family. Her children are both scientists and artists and the best conversationalists I know. I adore them as my own.

Chapter - what? FIVE?

In order to install window screens in our three story house, we had to buy a 28 goddamn foot tall extension ladder. I’m not particularly good with spacial relations, so I went to the hardware store. No. The ladder is 14 feet long at its shortest, which somehow does not fit into the bed of J’s normal person pickup truck. Lesson learned.

I bought the ladder online. A month ago. And it cost almost as much as all of our window screens cost! They delivered it yesterday, from like an appliance delivery truck. Two guys had to carry it in the house. It’s lying (half sized, mind you) across the whole foyer and dining room, looking very ominous.

I fall off ladders. A few years ago, hanging Christmas lights, I fell just a few feet and seriously injured myself. About ten years ago, also hanging Christmas lights, I fell one and a half stories, but landed in some bushes and only had minor injuries.

We got a call for a placement yesterday. It was a message we didn't see for eight hours because nobody told us our more and older request was approved.

We are committed to keeping Smol J an only child while he is with us. Baby twin girls headed to TPR would be our only exception. So, I think our odds of keeping him an only are good.

If he goes to Relative, we'll say yes to a young sibship of two, but we will keep a bed open for Smol J as long as we live in this county.

Our home is settling into home shape. It’s time to start moving licensing along.

I asked E (readers’ note: BFE is a ridiculous pseudonym, my best friend and housemate is henceforth blog-named E) what an ideal foster placement would look like to her. We had that talk. Basically she is the most supportive person in the world and I’m lucky to have her. She reminded me that things are not ideal right now - a new little thrown into the still settling household would be a damn mess.

No placement is imminent anyway, because of my grief-addled heart. I have several very easy paperwork steps to take to keep things moving forward and I have. not. done. them.

I realize that the process of getting licensed does not equal a placement. And OBVIOUSLY I realize that having a placement does not mean any less room in my heart for Smol J. But how do I feel? I feel like it would be the worst betrayal. I know that is so not true in any world, especially in foster care and especially especially in situation we are in, where he is safe with his loving family. But that sweet boy has my heart in a chokehold. Reason has no room to wiggle in just now.

If Reason were present, I know that I would be very excited about moving forward with licensing. I would have placement fever like crazy. I can see it over the top of the hill ahead, like the sun rising. And I want to slam the windows shut and crawl under the covers and snuggle Smol J’s toys and cry for days when I see a ray of that sunshine.

We also have the option of being put on a wait list for the inspection, and we could get scheduled if they have a cancellation.  However, that means we would like have a 30 minute “heads up” before the inspection happens.  Not that we are planning on wrecking the house or undoing any of the major things they’ll be checking, but less than a hour heads up?  Our caseworker gives the inspection folks a list every Friday for the following weeks wait list so we’ll probably only go that route if we feel antsy.  

We also have to take an additional 3 hour class, although that will be easy to schedule.  Apparently there’s been some state-wide policy updates, so all current licensed foster parents have to complete the class by June and all new foster families have to complete it within 3 months of being licensed.  Fortunately, since it’s new and everyone has to do it, there are options for evening or weekend classes.