#forever feels

It had become a thing that happens every year now, and has expanded to more holidays, even anniversaries and birthdays, but the Valentine’s love letters still are the ones that make him tear up the most. They always seemed to lead to kissing when they had time and were in the same place, and often so much more.

This year, they happened to be on the road, and Harris was with the team. There had been a game the night before and the morning was theirs, as they didn’t need to leave until that afternoon. They’d slept in, stayed tangled in the sheets, and ordered breakfast from a nearby diner that delivered, and then Troy handed Harris this year’s letter. The letter was in an envelope this year and seemed thicker.

“I’m gonna take a shower and give you time to read it. I know you like to process it alone.” Troy kissed Harris thoroughly before he slid out of the bed and crossed the room to the bathroom.

Harris sat for a moment just looking at the envelope before he pulled the folded papers from the envelope and started to read. This was their first Valentine’s since they’d gotten married, and while no letter would ever top the one Troy gave him on their wedding night, he was curious why this one was so thick. He only made it to the bottom of the first page before the tears were pooling in his eyes, Troy had gone through and wrote about all the ways he had loved him over the years.

He talked about those early days of nerves and how he tried every day to be worthy of Harris, of course Harris always thought he didn’t need to work so hard at that. He talked about the way Harris looked in the stands watching him play and how it brought him strength. He detailed the way he looked when he slept, and how when he reached for Troy at night while doing so made him feel ridiculously loved. Harris made it through it somehow, but his eyes were full, and his heart felt that way too.

Harris slid off the bed and pulled his clothes off, leaving a trail behind him as he walked to the bathroom door. Troy was rinsing his hair when he entered the bathroom the open door and tossed his underwear toward the hamper. Troy was smiling at him through the water that cascaded down his face as he slid the door open and beckoned Harris in. He slipped in next to him, the water warm and soothing against his skin, and slid the door shut, and his lips met Troy’s as he pressed him in to the wall. Their lips met slow and steady, not hurried. The way they kissed had evolved over time, it had grown deeper and steadier, feeling like home, but still so amazingly hot.

“I love you,” Harris whispered as he pulled back just enough to speak, and rested his forehead against Troy’s. “Your words always make me melt, but this one … I am so happy to get to be with you forever and have this token of where we started.”

“I love you, too. So damn much, it used to scare the hell outta me. Now it just makes me realize I’m the luckiest man alive that you love me back,” Troy whispered as his hands slid up Harris’s back.

Harris couldn’t help but follow when Troy pulled him in and they kissed, slow and deliberate, as the water cascaded over them. Their lips slid, and Harris grazed Troy’s lips with his teeth as his tongue followed to soothe it. Troy made an almost whimper sound, on his exhale, that made Harris weak. Their hands traveled over skin they had learned what seemed like so long ago, they explored familiar routes with none of the grasping or franticness that used to be there. Harris traced the muscles under Troy’s skin, from his side an up over his shoulder, as if he was mapping the body he knew so well. Troy’s hands traced from Harris’s shoulders down his sides and over his soft stomach, almost reverent, as if he hadn’t been touching those same spots for years.

As the water fell relentless and warm over them, they continued kissing, their lips slid together over and over as if they had all the time in the world. Each kiss felt like a renewed vow. Harris pulled back, and slid his fingers along Troy’s jaw and he looked at him, his husband. The word still felt weird to say, but really, he’d known they were forever for so long that it really shouldn’t.