I still can’t believe my eyes and ears that force marriage is still exist. What I’m implying is the force marriage in modern family. I’m not against the force marriage in old tradition family because I know that they consider it as a part of their culture and their children must have been aware of it. However, in this society from a modern family which has a father works as a Professor/Lecturer, a mother works as a wholesaler tricked and force their daughter to marry with a guy that she doesn’t love or not even closed to before. In just one month, the parents and the elder agree to marry their children in the next six month. What’s more, they stop her education while she is already in sophomore year majored in architecture. She has always been a bright student, top student among the class and even the school during her high school, but now look at her, being pulled out from school and forced into an arrange marriage from her parents that can destroy almost her entire life which in some point of her life, she can become a successful or even a genius architect.
How do you expect a healthy relationship from that?
I have no idea how a healthy relationship can be built from that. I’m not assuming anything, but look and think about it. Two people that barely know each other are going to live with each other for half of their entire life? Think about it, all they just know is their name, work, basic little things of their favorite, and that’s it. It is true that you can develop your romance along the way of your marriage life, it’s lucky if the two of you are getting along well, but what if the two of you are completely opposite? We all heard a lot about domestic violent, bullying, cheating, or even murder his or her own partner. You never know what could happen, what is he/she like deep down inside? Is he/she a devil or is he/she an angle? Are you, the parents are the one who are responsible for their future? NO! YOU ARE NOT. The couple, themselves needed to find their way through it.
Parent stereotype toward Force Marriage.
Parent usually say “Because I wanted the best for my children”, “I have so many experience in life”, “I know people, and I know who is good and who is bad.” Or “Because I am his/her parents.” All these talked, don’t make any sense to me. Why? Because you have so many experience in life doesn’t mean what your children is going to meet next used to be your experience too. Your experience was in the 90s and things changes, not little things but lots and lots of things have changed, and now it is in the 20s. It doesn’t remain the same anymore. Or even if it is the same, your choices, your experiences don’t always turn out good all the time then why not let your children have the freedom to choose what they want and independently responsible for their own mess, perhaps, their choice of life is even better than yours. Also, the best for your children is not from what you have decide for them, but it is from what have their life teaches them and what they want their life to be. Some people they don’t want to get married because they wanted to stay independently alone all by him/herself.
The force marriage that are happened from a modern family usually involve with business or the daughter/son walked the wrong path then got into trouble or because he/she can’t find one by her/himself. For these reasons, I’m not against at all, but the business thing? How do you think it is possible to put your own children future/happiness at risk just because to have a successful life by yourself? Isn’t it too selfish for you as a parent?
In this era, we all have the rights to fight for what we believe, what we think is right. We all have the voice, and we suppose to make it heard not keep it down. You have idea? You raise it up, you make your voice to be heard. We all have the freedom of speech and act, so use the best out of it.
