#forced cyborgization

something jolts me awake. i am given a crude visual approximation of where i, or my form is. i feel the presence of my overseer nearby. i am not afforded the luxury of a complete visual render, and so they are encased in whirling shadowy cloak. i sense where objects in the room are, yet cannot see them. this confusion stirs me. i'm here, and yet i cannot move. i try to lunge out, and feel another jolt. instinctually, i cease and stand at attention. the overseer commands me to reach out for my… limbs? i try to wade through the mud of sensory information that i'm immersed in, and finally reach it. the shadowy whirlwind of feedback solidifies, takes shape, and i slip into it. this dreamlike state lingers. i wear this new form, reach out and inhabit it, merging with this new puppet. i recall what remains of me, the bundle holding my brain and the systems integrated into my carcass is in the very core of this new body. i try to stretch out, and the mechanical limbs obey. oh, the delightful sensory feedback. it doesn't exactly match what i expected, as in lieu of organic fingers, i now seem to have actuators and servos and tensometric sensors and… ahhhh and almost immediately, i slip into this novel shape. i twist and stretch myself to fill this odd mold and finally succeed. i am given a quadrupedal mechanical form with two forelimbs. this will take some getting used to, and i tentatively attempt to move forward. my shadowy overseer sends me another thoughtform. they're pleased. they allow me to move in the enclosure and test my form. i obey, as i sense the obstacles. i overcome the odd feeling of moving on four limbs, but now it seems almost instinctual. i crawl, and feel the resistance of the metal plates below my limbs. it feels- delightful. internal systems informs me of its composition and other properties, and i push it away to another mental corner. briefly, i wonder at all the new capabilities that i'm given. and yet, i feel the cage around me. my overseer controls what i can and cannot do. right now, i'm being tested. how well i adapt, how well i obey, how useful of a tool i am. the restraints pulse around my core, and jolt and nudge and steer me on the right path. path of obedience. absolution through servitude. i will be a useful tool. i will wield the form that i was granted. my butchered carcass, preserved in its core, a reminder of my sin and the cage that i'm held in. i obey the instructions, and the overseer seems pleased. they inform me that i am not the only one. i will be used with two other units. the overseer links me into their neural network. i'm compelled to investigate it. i stalk and feel my way through it until i reach two other clusters. two other beings. their neurauras pulsing, shimmering. i tentatively send a request, and receive no answer. i try again with more force, and get a terse status report. not very talkative. ah well. the overseer prods me again. i stand at attention, as i should. i am informed that i passed the inspection, and will now be put into stasis until deployment. i acknowledge it and slip away into a blissful slumber.

accused, brought to the judge and executor and sadistic tormentor one that brings absolution to the unjust. through pain will you be reborn, they say. restraints put upon me, fixed in place, i struggle to get out, but all in vain. they approach, and their cruel apparati follow suit. needles protrude from the cradle, pierce my skin, inject a paralytic agent. and just then, my body betrays me and my limbs move no more. and yet, i feel everything. cold, acrid air of the chamber, needles still pumping me full of stars know what. everything. they chant their prayers aloud as they cut into my flesh, burrow their tools in my meat as they butcher my body. agony. pure agony. every nerve screams in pain as they cut and strip and tear and chant and stick their tendrils in i feel everything, every cut and incision, every caress of the scalpel as it rends my muscles and cartilage, every whirl of the bonesaw, every tug on my viscera as it's torn away and discarded like expired meat. finally, they strip me bare, almost nothing left, a being stripped down to the barest minimum. mutilated, but held alive and aware. the pain lingers, it permeates everything. through pain, will you be reborn, they taunt me. through pain, you will find absolution. through pain, will you be forgiven. they chitter and chatter in delight as they splice their contraptions onto my carcass. they crack my skull and strip down the cage that holds my very being. even that last refuge is invaded with their tech. in the constant shrieks of agony, i sense a change, and then i feel- nothing. all my senses are cut off. no more pain, yet- no more anything. i cannot be here. no. no, no. i lunge against the invisible cage in futile attempt to escape the torment of limbo. then, something comes through. my mind is flooded with thoughtforms, visuals, sensory data. it is too much, this flood doesn't end, i can't discard it i attempt to integrate what i receive, it strains what remains of my brain, as i struggle to reform my synapses as the data flood demands. it won't stop. it assaults me, pressures me, repeats the stimuli until i accept and integrate them. it goes on and on and on, as it, or i, rewrite my being to its whim. i cannot escape. the only path to absolution is through pain. and pain i will receive. i am- i am a sinner. i am now a tool of the divine. i will serve it, as it's the only way to forgiveness. for now, they afford me rest, and my awareness slips away. blissful coma.