#for mel

He hasn't moved; you're not sure he's even breathing until he offers a few micro nods. It took a herculean amount of strength not to blurt out that he loved you, but that would be absurd. Normally he’d put on the ‘ol Harrington charm of pretending he didn’t care, but he was too far gone at that point.

"You didn't say where you are taking me," you shifted your weight from foot to foot. "So hopefully it's not to go rock climbing or something."

His wallet chain jingled as he stood to step over and kiss you softly on the corner of your mouth, hovering close as he spoke. "That's right, it's a surprise, but what you're wearing is fine. More than fine. It's beautiful, I mean, you're beautiful." He moved back to gather his thoughts. "You'll need a coat or something though. Something warm you can put on once we get there."

"Consider my interest piqued," you scratched your fingers through the side of his hair, tucking a piece behind his ear with the hoop piercing, and he leaned into the touch like a cat. He wore a black Corroded Coffin tee under his blue and green flannel, and that spicy cologne you liked.

It's the first week in December, but it's rare for the temperature to ever fall below freezing in Hawkeye, so you no longer own a heavy winter coat. Your trusty leather jacket is hanging on the door handle behind you, and you hoped that would suffice for the evening.

"You're so far away," Steve said once you were in the truck, patting the space on the bench seat next to him, begging with those puppy dog eyes for you to scoot over to be closer to him. Once you were there, his hand went to your knee, and that is where it stayed for the rest of the trip unless he was fiddling with the radio.

"I missed you while you were gone," you said over the grumble of the engine and his trusty yacht rock sifting from the speakers. Steve just got back from being out of town on a run with his motorcycle club for a few days.

"Really?" He turned to stare at your profile as if he needed confirmation that it wasn't a joke. "I missed you too. Thought about you the whole time. There was a payphone at the place we ate at on the way home. I was gonna call, but then I thought nah that's stupid."

"I would've liked that,” you replied, but it was too quiet for him to hear.

He drove for a while, to the outskirts of town where the highest point in the sprawling desert was telephone poles lined against a darkening sky, snuggled in a sea of sagebrush. He cut left down a road that didn’t even look like a road at first and then crests a ledge that drops down into a valley.

Finding a station on the radio playing Christmas music, he twists the knob to turn up the volume a notch. It's Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas by Judy Garland.

"I love this song," you said, cracking a smile. 

"I know."

It was your turn to check his profile to see if he was pulling your leg. Steve only shrugged and squeezed your knee.

"How would you know that?"

He sniffed, secretly proud of himself. "You, um, you told me. One time at school you were sitting alone on the roundabout humming a song, so I asked to know what it was. You seemed like you didn't really want to tell me, but I don't know, I'm pretty persuasive, I guess." He flicked a shy smirk. "It was in a movie you used to watch with your grandmother."

You weren't sure if it was the memory itself or the idea that a ten-year-old Steve managed to retain that detail, but emotions tightened in your throat and tickled there until you coughed.

"I wish it would snow," you admitted, lowering your temple to his shoulder. You imagined the landscape ahead covered in white with fluffy candy flakes blanketing the windshield before the wipers brushed them away, but it never snowed in Hawkeye.

"We're almost there," he replied with an answer that was seemingly unrelated, tilting his head so that it was touching yours.  .

It's then that you see it: Hellfire Hollow. 

Against the deep purple sunset, the trees looked like long, crooked, menacing fingers coming up out of the ground.

"Have you ever been here before?"

"Never," you said. "I've only heard the stories."

The bark of the trees that comprised Hellfire Hollow were said to be black with char and void of any foliage or other signs of life. Some say they were the product of a horrible fire that swept the town generations ago; others believe they came out of the earth like that.

"Didn't a kid disappear out here a while back?" You adjusted in your seat, leaning forward to get a better look. “He was in high school.  There was a search party and everything.”

"Yeah they never found him," he parked and turned the engine off but left the lights on.  “He showed up like months later as if no time had passed.  Said he went through a tree, ended up in a place called Hawkins, and couldn’t find his way back. No one believed him.”

“Weird.” That was the only thing you could think of to say, peering in through the sinister shapes. 

“That’s Hawkeye for you,” he unfastened his seatbelt and paused.  “You know you don’t have to worry, right? I won’t let anything happen to you.”

“I know,” your gaze fixed out the windshield to the motes of dust swarming in the beam of the headlights. “I like this place, it’s creepy.”

“I thought you might,” he stretched across the cab with a grunt to flick open the glovebox and grab a flashlight with a yellow handle.  “We’ll go get some dinner after this, but there’s something really cool I want to show you. Not many people know about it. Grab your coat.”

“How far are we going?” You wondered this as he helped you step down from the cab; you couldn’t imagine traveling far enough for that much of a temperature drop.  

“Hundred yards or so,” he stole a kiss, and then another and another, lips salty and cinnamon sweet, taking your face in his hand for one final long one, huffing a soft exhale of pleasure. “I promise, it’ll be worth it.”

A sharp wind bit through the air, whipping his hair in his eyes, and your whole body rippled from the chill, hissing as you shrugged into your jacket.

He held your hand once it was through your sleeve and pointed the flashlight beam ahead. Each step felt like walking on popcorn, and a huge bird, possibly an owl, flapped its wings to ascend from the branches with the fanfare of some mystical beast.

The weight and smell of the air changed, as if that specific area belonged to another space in time and you’d crossed an invisible barrier.  Faint whispers crackled at your ears like they would in a hypnagogic state, making your skin ripple with gooseflesh.

“It’s right over here,” you were pinned to his side while he guided you to the left, carving a path of light through the inky night. One massive, charred tree had a thick trunk with an opening in it the size of a hobbit door.  

You shivered so hard in reaction to the icy pocket of space that your back teeth clacked together.  Steve hooked an arm around you and pulled you into his side while he used the other to point at the opening in the tree.

“Get closer,” he hushed, giving a soft nudge. “Look inside.”

After a sharp intake of breath, you held it in, staring at the arched opening in the seemingly ancient tree that was something out of a fable; it had roots erupting from the ground like the bent knuckles of some earth dwelling beast..  

The opening was big enough for you to crawl through, but just.  Without a glance at your companion, you bent down and shuffled forward, bending a knee to stick your head in.

“Wait no!” He was quick to snatch you back, his eyes wide and feral. “I didn’t say go in. That would be bad.”

You wet your bottom lip, your warm breath making smoke in the air. “Why would it be bad?”

He took a firm grip on your arm instead of answering. “Let’s look together.  Stay back here with me.”

You were happy to go along with that suggestion, another chill cramping the muscles in your thighs. 

Lowered to mirroring crouches, you peered inside.  At first you saw nothing but the dark insides of a hollowed out trunk.  After a few blinks, the space filled with what resembled static from a television. 

But it wasn’t static; it was snow.

Snow?

A gentle stream of fluffy, white flakes inside the tree? Never had Hawkeye ever seen a snow fall.

Steve turned to catch your reaction, pleased to watch your jaw go slack.

“How is it possible?” Your mesmerized eyes glistened with wonder, tilting your head back to see if it was falling from above.  

“Hell if I know,” he nuzzled his nose against your cheek. “It’s a doorway to another place, that’s what they say.”

“Another place?” You squinted, peering closer to see the outline of a building, lined with pine trees. There was a whole scene of a tiny town in there, as if someone shook a gigantic snow globe.

He rested his temple against yours to watch the scene.  “I remember you said you wanted to see some snow.”

“Yeah.” Your throat tightened when you swallowed, a dam of tears building behind your eyes. Steve had proven to be such a thoughtful boyfriend, you felt melancholy about all of those years you’d spent without him.  

“It’s a doorway to another world that is kinda like ours,” he continued. “Some people go through and come back, but some people don’t. There’s no rhyme or reason to it, as far as I can tell.  A guy from our club went through there once when he was running from the law.  He showed up the next day, but he was ten years older. Said he’d made a whole other life for himself with a wife and all in that other town, but he robbed a bank and thought he’d hide out here for a bit.”

“Did he go back?” Your hands crept under Steve’s lined Carhart jacket to leech his warmth and his armpits welcomed you in.

“That’s the sad bit,” he squeezed you, exhaling.  “The tree wouldn’t let him go back.  Every time he tried, he’d just end up in the belly of a regular old tree.  He tried for months, it drove him mad I think. Ended up crashing his motorcycle in a high speed chase. Died instantly.”

You were silent, watching a few stray snowflakes escape the doorway only to melt instantly on the matte black bark.  

“Maybe that means he finally made it back,” Steve mumbled.  

“I hope so.” You didn’t realize at first, but you were taking steps backward, creating distance from the entrance.  The idea occurred to you that maybe some cowboy lasso would fly out and snag you to drag you into that other place.  

“C’mere,” Steve pulled you around so that your chest was against his, leaning in for another kiss.

“The tip of your nose is like ice,” you chuckled, dragging your lips along his before wiping your own nose with the back of your sleeve.  

“Yeah, it’s fucking freezing out here. You hungry?”