There’s a fly in my house that’s getting way too fucking comfortable around me and it’s starting to piss me off!

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There’s a fly in my house that’s getting way too fucking comfortable around me and it’s starting to piss me off!

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This poor cow was trying hard to get rid of all the annoying flies.
I’m trying to write a book and this fly is buzzing around the room. GO AWAY YOU INSENSITIVE CREATURE NOBODY LIKES YOU
And marionettes....
My greatest fear in life is a race of huge, black, insectoid creatures able to infiltrate our world, our homes, flawlessly and easily incapacitate or kill us through an array of diseases and toxins. Houseflies for the layman.
There is a giant fly in my house right now and when it comes near me it actually sounds like a 747 is about to land in my ear.

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So I was lecturing this fly (don't ask) on how to get through a window when it kept head butting the glass above the open area. This fly then continues to stop and sit on the ledge looking straight at me 'doing my homework' eating chocolate watching YouTube not doing homework and I swear it looked disappointed.
Chrissie needs fly equipment.
Okay horse owners, I need some help.
My mare is 21 years old and she's spoiled. She's a short, stocky, pudgy Quarter Horse mare that I love desperately even though she's old and bitchy. I'm sure all those horse owners with older horses and ponies know what I'm talking about.
Well, my poor old girl is a fly magnet. And I've just recently got to the point where I can finally go ahead and buy her some flyboots and a flymask (flysheet she'd eat so I can't go do that one) instead of just relying on flyspray various times throughout the day. Her little itty bitty tail just isn't cutting it (it was chewed on by colts at her previous owner's place).
What I'm wondering is if I could get some help with brands. Personally, I've been leaning toward trying the SmartPack's flyboots because they're supposed to mold to the horse's legs and keep the legs themselves cool through the mesh that they're made with. The only thing is they're pretty spendy, but they're supposed to be really good. What I want to know is if any other horse mommies and daddies have a good idea on other brands that keep their legs cool (Chrissie hates it when her legs get hot), and at the same time keeps those flies off her legs? It'd be much appreciated!
Thank you to every one who reads this,
Moose!
flys or flies whatever the hell you want to call yourselves out of all things you can land on in this world you choose the spout of my water bottle are you kidding me