#fivesigns

12/25

I got her help after that. She went to a rehab facility and got a therapist. I visited her on Christmas where I was thanked. The weird ting is, I never saw that coming.

Author Note: 

12/16

My phone rang... it was her. “ Hey there sweetie. How’s that Christmas Shopping going?” I answered. “ My parents are getting divorced, for real this time. I’m supposed to live with my mom but she just kicked me out because she found out I smoke. I have no money, no where to go. It is almost Christmas and I have no friends or family to share it with.” there was a few seconds of silence and I didn’t know what to say. “ You know this would of never happened if I would of just kept my head out of everyones business and if I didn’t see the world as this big happy ball of enegry. Everything is my fault.” She started to cry. She has done that a lot lately. She blamed stuff on her self then cried the just spaced out. “ Im so sorry honey. You can stay with me! How about that? I’ll meet you at the mall in five minutes okay?” I offered. “Sure” she mumbled right before hanging up. As I was driving I saw a girl standing at a bridge. I was a little confused at first as to why there was a girl there but the I saw her put her foot on the railing. I slammed on the breaks and sprinted out of my car. “ WAIT!!!” I yelled. She turned her face to look at me for a second. It was her. She saw me and started moving faster. Right as she stood up at the top and looked down at the rushing cars below her I grabbed her waist and picked her off of the railing. 

1.personality change 

2.Agitation

3.withdrawl

4.Poor Self-Care

6/23

I went over to her house today. Her hair wasn’t brushed, nor did she brush it when I asked if she wanted to go on a walk. She walked with her hair all knotted up and her face makeupless, with sweat pants a baggy shirt in the middle of July. I took her to the park around the corner in hopes that it would remind her of how much she used to love the world. Instead,she whipped a cigarette out of her pocket. “ WHAT IS THAT?” I yelled. She casually lit it as if it was something that was normal. “ It’s a cigarette. You have eyes use them.” she was obviously annoyed by my reaction. “ Those..Those will k-kill you” I managed to say. She merely rolled her eyes. “ Where is your judgment? Don’t you know better? Do you want to be dead or like those people in those commercials?” I raised my voice. “ Does it look like I care? Look at me, really look at me? Do you think I care, does it look like I care about my future. Hell, I haven’t been to school for months. I am not catching up now! What do you expect from me?” She yelled. “ What do I expect? I expect you to have enough decency and good judgement to not do this to yourself! You walk around a mess and now you smoke. Thats just great.” I said. I couldn’t stay around I knew she was about to either yell or cry. Without waiting to find out I turned and left.

1.Personality Change

2.Agitation

3. Withdrawl

5/1

I was at school, 7 in the morning as usual. I saved her a seat, as usual. The bell rang.... she wasn't there. Half way through home room... she wasn’t there. Homeroom ends... she still isn’t there. I pul my phone out under the desk and text her, “ Hey. Where are you? You have missed twice every week for the past three weeks. Whats going on? Are you Okay?” two hours later she answers, “ I’m going to be completely honest. There is no point, I have no friends, besides you but that’s probably because you are my boyfriend. Honestly it’s been really hard for me not to push you away like everyone else. I keep waiting for you to leave but you don’t. And also I am already failing all my classes to the point of no return, so there is just no point. I just don’t care anymore” I couldn’t even respond. I don’t even know if there was anything to say. I had to fight the urge to ask where the old her went, I miss her.

1.Personality Change

2.Agitation