#fire.doc.bts

there’s no reason for namjoon to have any guests.

it’s 2:46 AM on a sunday night and for one–there’s not a single soul in seoul he knows that would come visit him at this hour. namjoon’s apartment is in one of the shittiest neighbourhoods of seoul, and walking around at this hour is asking to get mobbed. yet there’s only one person he knows who would even think of showing up at this time.

y/n l/n.

but it’s impossible…and way too many months have passed since you’d both seen each other. he’d moved to seoul whilst you’d stayed in ilsan after your fallout—an irrational trip to the waterfalls. namjoon had always wanted to go and once upon a time, you’d have gone anywhere with him.

three nights in after one too many fights, you disappeared the morning after.

namjoon acted like he didn’t care and blocked your number. went back home and started packing. he tried to contact you a week later—no response. namjoon didn’t try again.

yet he opens the door and there you are.

concern quickly takes over the surprise on his face as he analyses your features. your lip’s busted, eye heavily bruised with dark circles painted underneath. he watches you wince as you crack an empty smile.

time seems to freeze over as he pulls you in and lets you sink into his arms.

“you’re an idiot. i hope you know that.” namjoon murmurs.

“yeah. sorry.”

he pulls away and frowns, eyes slightly red but you don’t comment on it. instead you grin at him.

“no welcome back?”

“shut up, y/n.”

He could get used to this.

Somehow, it takes him back to his childhood. Hoseok’s always loved the adventures they went on together back then...their special escapes together. A time to finally have away from the anxiety of being at home.

Memories of the two of them wandering along deserted forest roads and derelict paths all for the goal of finding a place to be alone. Together. Often they’d compose elaborate stories and formulate a plot for their ‘purpose’ in their newly discovered world. Imagination took them far. Anything was possible with the two of them.

The thought subsides as he gets a reality check for the third time today. Things aren’t the way they’re supposed to be. Hoseok has work tomorrow, which is followed by two hour long lectures in the afternoon that he can’t miss. Yet he knows he won’t ever get this again. This opportunity won’t arise again. The consideration of going back seems too irrational by this point.

Hoseok takes another dreary look at the intrepid moon, his new source of comfort since his phone glared at 12% battery after his attempt to check social media. Again.

Unsurprisingly, there’d been absolutely no news on a Kim Namjoon and Jung Hoseok—nothing at all. Namjoon had laughed at him for even thinking so, voicing his thoughts of, “two ungovernable eighteen year old boys” not being their town’s biggest priority. To them, Kim Namjoon was the irksome star child who over achieved and seemingly cruised through his early school life with little to no hardship. Jung Hoseok was the burdensome national champion to multiple dance competitions, now enrolled to university with an exceptionable scholarship and decent grades. To them, they were merely two teenagers that got ‘lucky’.

The criticism Namjoon lashed out onto their society had never really reached him till today. Not like before. Because here they were, in the middle of an unknown town located in a distance city, now missing for three days. Hoseok had expected news after 24 hours, but nobody came looking for them. No texts, no messages, no notifications.

He really could get used to this.

Namjoon lays besides him completely dead to the world; uncovered because of his stubborn choice to give to blanket to Hoseok and covered by his flimsy denim jacket instead. The scene reminds him of one of their many sleepovers from their childhood and as the memories play out, his eyes gloss over. Sure sleeping outside isn’t ideal, but next to Namjoon, really anything’s possible. Hoseok breaks into a fond smile before joining him in the world of sleep.

5:27AM

There’s a small sigh of defeat as light from the grey sky seeps through the small cracks of his navy blue curtains. It’s sunset. He’s so, so tired. But sleep still won’t take him away. The only thing to do is stare at the ceiling.

It’s been the same day for so long.

His household is quiet, which is a first. Sometimes, there will be the sound of cutlery and dishes being put away in the kitchen or the creaks of Seokjin’s mattress when he rolls over one too many times. His house is old. It’s nothing new. But he doesn’t hear anything.

Namjoon hates that.

With a groan, he throws the covers off, slides out of bed and trudges towards his set up. He’s abruptly reminded at how small his chair is when he makes an attempt to sit but falls down into the seat. Fatigue doesn’t enable him to care, but his back aches a little. Namjoon hunches forward and opens his laptop, pressing the power button quite impatient as he taps the keys to pass time.

Producing tracks this early in the morning is nothing new - after 2AM all of his emotions are raw but not very comprehensible. Namjoon writes about his inability to stop moving, his frustration over the mismatched paint in the living room, his friends...he writes a lot about his friends. They all hold such individuality and are an overwhelming misfit of people. None of them match one another. They fight a lot. But things work.

He questions their friendship a lot. Seokjin has reprimanded him for it, told him that overthinking won’t solve the mystery. Why he and Taehyung, a boy who lives in such a delusional yet honest fantasy versus himself who views the world in such a cynical viewpoint get along. Why Jimin who fights himself for perfection but understand his limits and Hoseok who won’t accept anything but the best from himself no matter what, found something in each other. Why Yoongi who overworks himself but is to disorientated to do anything anymore and Jungkook who emits energy and excellence tolerate one another.

And why Seokjin, even deals with any of it.

Namjoon makes the assumption that that’s just how teenagers and young adults work. He can’t bring himself to think any further. He gets confused.

Subsequent to logging on, he opens Cubase, looking for the piece he had started yesterday. It had been something simple and calming, using a piano sample from Yoongi as well as some incoherent vocals from Hoseok and Seokjin. The theme had been the moon. Namjoon can remember enjoying what he had made.

He finds himself in the mood to make some improvements and maybe mix in the file that Jungkook begged him to use...which at first he didn’t plan on using just yet, but he feels like making Jungkook happy a little earlier. With the events of this week, Namjoon isn’t too sure if the youngest will hold up to well. But then again, it’s Jeon Jungkook.

Having occupied himself with the work in front of him, he finds himself jolting when the door slams open. The person at the door stares at Namjoon with such tension, that he really, really wants to look away but will probably feel ten times more uncomfortable than he does currently. Namjoon did not prepare himself to see him today. He also, was not away they had a key… no one is awake and he didn’t hear a knock, doorbell aside because it’s broken.

Nevertheless, Kim Taehyung doesn’t say anything. He just stares.

“Um…you need something?” Namjoon definitely won’t comment on the fact that Taehyung is wearing the same clothes as he was yesterday and looks more sleep deprived than his own self -- which is a big problem. Tae likes sleeping. A lot. Although he’s learnt not to ask too many questions, his presence at the door is unnerving. He doesn’t like it.

But Taehyung walks towards him and puts his hands on his shoulders. His hands are shaking. It’s killing him not to ask what happened. But it’s never the right move. Namjoon goes for small talk.

“Tae, do you want to talk today?”

There’s a pause.

“M’fine.” His voice is deeper than usual, groggy, unused. “Tired.”

Something he notices, that worried him a little more, is the state of his headphones. They’re noise cancelling, ones that Yoongi and Jin bought him for his birthday. Taehyung wore them everywhere and although it did get him into questionable situations, he always took care of them. Tae never let anyone touch it And the arch of his beloved headphones are completely smashed, in one of his hands. There are small cuts running along said hands, some fresh, others old. The fresh ones are jagged and dried blood is splotched his scars.

Namjoon still can’t ask any questions.

“If you’d like to, you can take a shower and sleep in my room. I’d be okay with it.”

Tae’s face contorts into a confused frown, “You’d be okay with it?”

“Definitely.”

Hesitation is evident in his eyes, but he nods and walks off into the bathroom. Namjoon hopes that Taehyung still trusts him as much as before and that they’ll talk about it when he wants to. But for now, he’ll just wait.

9:42PM

Hoseok finds Jimin in front of the dance studio, soaked. There’s a small red bag by his side, but it’s all that he noticeably possesses. It’s autumn and the weather’s been lashing out at their town for a few days now. He at least thinks. It’s been a while since he’s looked out to check, let alone felt the cold clammy air against his skin.

What shocks him is his own self-being absurdly calm about the situation. Jimin looks up through his newly orange hair and there’s a smile on his face - his stomach twists at the expression. Hoseok doesn’t smile back. He’s sure Jimin knows why...he definitely does.

Shrugging off his coat, Hoseok pulls Jimin up so that he stands before him and pulls the coat onto his smaller frame, zipping it and wrapping his scarf around his neck. It’s too big for him. Hoseok’s clothing has never fit Jimin. It’s a known fact. He’s been told that he likes it that way.

All the strength in his body is mustered to ignore the elephant in the room: How long were you out here? Aren’t you cold? Do you know that this won’t change anything? Do you know I don’t like you doing this to yourself?

Jimin, however, is preoccupied with looking at the image of them in the reflective mirrors. The smile on his face has wavered slightly. Hoseok thinks he won’t say anything, till he finally meets his eyes.

There’s worry.

“Hoseok,” he calls, biting into his cheeks. He hadn’t noticed how pale Jimin looked,l his cheek tinted red. “Why didn’t you open the door? I’ve been here--”

A car streaks past them and Jimin flinches, eye contact breaking for just a second. Hoseok feels the guilt building up.

“I was looking for you. You didn’t pick up. Did your phone die…? You have to remember to bring a charger you know? Didn’t know what happened...I was scared...”

There’s nothing to say. They both know what happened, Hoseok thinks. Jimin’s just in denial.

“I was in the studio. I left a note, said that I’d be practising.”

“You never leave notes and you didn’t change and leave at this time. But it’s okay, I found you in the end. Namjoon said you’d be here, of course. And of course, Namjoon was right. Right? Namjoon.”

Of course he would. It surprises him, that he hadn’t been found sooner. That Namjoon hadn’t found him. However, his thoughts are again put to the side.

“Okay.”

Jimin forces a grin at his reply. It nearly makes him feel bad.

“Yeah.” The grin, again, wavers. “Okay.”

The walk back is quiet. Jimin walks with his eyes on his shoes, and Hoseok takes the time to absorb their situation.

It’s Friday and there’s still no word from his family after the events of last week whilst Jimin still obviously hasn’t gone home. He’d been staying with Hoseok, though sometimes shifted to one of the others’ houses. Despite his efforts to force Jimin to go back - the younger had stuck firmly by his side despite all the shit he’d thrown at him. Jimin’s stubborn. It’s annoying, but he can’t help but find it endearing that he's going to such lengths...for him. It’s always been that way for Jimin. But they’re not eleven anymore.

“It’s unhealthy, Hobi. Don’t be childish.” Yoongi’s voice is as clear as day at the back of his head. Hoseok remembers that it’s nearly been two weeks since he’s seen Min Yoongi.

They shortly arrive in front of Namjoon’s house in maybe 10 minutes. He hadn’t been far and the look on Jimin’s face reflecting how incredulous he finds the occurrence. They’re greeted by the last face Hoseok expected to see this week.

Kim Seokjin greets them both with his signature smile. The dark bags under his eyes, untamed hair and mismatched clothing speak more words than he ever could. Hoseok finally smiles for the first time in a long time.

Jimin notices. But he can’t say anything.

“Welcome back Jin.”