#finally uploaded

The first thing that shocked you upon leaving the boat was the almost overbearing heat. You were used to harsh coldness and biting winds, not humid heat and sizzling airs. Sumeru was very different from Snezhnaya, that was for sure. The doctor chuckled into your ear, he had been watching your survey of the port with keen but interested eyes. 

Trees were what caught your attention first, there weren’t many trees in your homeland because the cold was rather good at killing any fertile farming land. And the rain turned to snow before it even hit the ground, and snow rarely melted fast enough to keep a tree watered. The trees here were lush and filled with different shades of greens and browns. Birds cooed, chirped, and flew in a dance of beauty and grace in the air. It was mesmerizing.

“How do you like it, my dearest collector?” His haughty and deep voice cooed next to you, his eyes, if you were able to see them, were looking at you with a softness unheard of by the mad doctor.  

“It’s beautiful…and so alive.” You sighed dreamily. True there was fauna and wildlife in Snezhnaya but it was nothing like this. It wasn’t warm with the sun beating down, just cold and dark. “Gorgeous. Simply gorgeous.”

“It is.” Dottore agreed, a slight nod of his head “But all this pales in comparison to you.” He smiled slyly as the color red dusted your cheeks and your eyes widened in surprise.

“I-” You paused, unsure of how to proceed. Dottore, archons, all your coworkers said things like that to you. Pantalone would call you his treasure anytime you saw him, Tartaglia was basically your puppy, Columbina called you her fair dove, Arlecchino was nice to you, the captain called you his darling, Sandrone called you her muse and said you were a masterpiece anytime she saw you. All of it was very weird, now that you think about it. Even Pierro treated you differently, calling you his love and babying you.

Then there was Scaramouche. He was difficult, one minute calling you his lovely doll and saying that Celestia itself was jealous of your beauty. Then going and insulting you to your face and even to other people as well. It was a rollercoaster of emotions with him, but you did miss it. You missed him.

Footsteps echoed on hollow wood, and a scowling face made it’s way into view. “There you are.” Scara’s voice rang out, eyes narrowing in anger. You still looked a bit dead on your feet, but it was nowhere near as bad as it was when you first started your journey. You can’t recall how long the journey was exactly… you slept for most of it. And when you weren’t sleeping, you were eating. That has made you a bit bloated, which Dottore said would go down the more your body got used to regular meals again.

“You look like trash.” Scara stated simply, hands on his hips as if he was a scolding mother. “But better than what I heard you looked like.” He added, still looking rather angry at you. “How on Teyvat could you let yourself get that bad? Are you so weak that just a little more paperwork was enough to throw you for a loop? Absolutely pathetic, you are completely worthless.”

You sighed, this is what you didn’t miss “Scaramouche. Not now.” It wasn’t just a bit of paperwork. It was everything Rosaylne was doing before she died, before her murder and even before her departure to Inazuma.

He hissed and took your hand with uncharacteristic softness, eyeing you with mean but worried eyes “Were you worried about me, Scara?” You asked softly, but you suppose it came off as teasing because the instant you stopped speaking he let go of your hand with pink cheeks and turned away. 

“Me? Worried for you?” He scoffed out the words like you had insulted him, which to him you probably did. “Never, I would never worry for someone as lowly as you.” His words held venom, yes, but lacked sincerity as they always do. You wish you could see the soft side of him, you can probably guarantee that it’s better than whatever side of him this is.

“No, of course not.” You agreed after a moment of thought, tilting your head. You decided to change the subject lest he get too annoyed and give you a headache like normal. “How are you liking sumeru, Balladeer?”

He didn’t miss how you used his code name instead of the nickname you always call him, and for some reason that just made him even angrier “it’s Scara to you, you lowly idiot.” he hissed, turning back to you with narrowed eyes. “And i’m liking it just fine. Here, let me show you around.”

You turned your head to look at Dottore, who simply smiled and waved you away with one hand. “Go on now, my dearest. You’ve earned a bit of fun before the work begins.” For some reason that just sent butterflies throughout your entire stomach. But you killed those fluttery bastards and turned away. Never again will someone hold your heart, you will never let anyone hurt you ever again. 

“Ok ok, show me.” you relented and let him drag you all around Sumeru to show you his favorite spots, his least favorite spots, and someone named Haypasia. You’re still a bit confused about her, in all honesty. She seems weird, and she makes you feel a dark ugly thing within your heart despite her showing you the utmost kindness. 

Sooner than you would have liked, sun was setting, bathing the city in a lovely orange hue as you and Scara walked down one of the many paths side by side. He was talking about something to you, but you stopped paying attention when a rather familiar looking blonde entered your vision two minutes ago. The traveler and their companion Paimon. Her murderer was walking the streets casually, as if the murder of your dearest friend wasn’t hanging off their shoulder like a noose. The familiar and never ending burning of the blood being pumped through your veins sprang to life with an intensity unknown to you.

Scaramouche seemed to notice, his mouth open to presumably tell you off in his aggressive manner before he stopped, eyes finding the same target as you had, and suddenly a vice grip locked around your wrist. He uttered your name, looking more serious than you have seen him be today “We should get back to the boat.” He didn’t state it like a suggestion, and the undertones of his voice made it seem like he was ordering you. “We’ve seen enough today.” He was being truthful, you definitely did see enough today. He had forced you to eat at three different food stalls, and bought you flowers at another 3 street vendors. All of which he was carrying for you in a bag with his other hand. 

The want to enact vengeance before the lowly scum even knew what was happening and who you were was strong, oh so strong as the burning only grew steadily in its intensity the more your eyes remained on them. They were laughing and happy, while you had been miserable for weeks. WEEKS. 

For some reason tears pricked at your eyes, memories of centuries with Rosalyne flashed by in only seconds, and your bottom lip trembled at the effort to keep in the building sobs. You don’t know why you were acting like this, you promised yourself and her that you wouldn’t do this exact thing. But it was so hard, and seeing the catalyst for all this grief finally broke you.

“Yeah…” You agreed in a broken whisper, shaky eyes trying to look away but stuck. “We have.”

He didn’t need to say anything else, or perhaps he couldn’t think of anything that would make you feel better. He knows that there isn’t enough words in the world, or enough gifts to stop grief weighing down your every step.

All of the warmth you accumulated throughout the day seemed to seep out of you and into the ground, and you felt cold. Cold and empty, like a corpse walking the earth again. You felt worse, if it were even possible. All you could see was Rosalyne, your dearest Rosalyne. And her smile that she saved for you, the feeling of her hands in your hair as she fixed it for you, the sound of her- wait.

Your breath, that once was calm, started coming out in short puffs and breathed in through gasps. Her voice! What did her voice sound like? You were too busy to remember it, how could you forget her voice! The songs she hummed, or the words of encouragement. You knew them all by heart but instead of hearing her voice you heard your own. 

Scara looked panicked, purple hues widened as he took in your panicked form. He tried to pick you up, but you locked up and started breathing worse. 

Looking around he decided to get Dottore, running off as quickly as he could. Leaving you alone in the shaded ground behind a tree.

You don’t remember the tears, sobs, or wails. All you remembered was that you forgot her voice, her sweet sweet voice. 

Cold gloved hands came into contact with your shoulder, and you flinched so violently people would think you were expecting a punch to follow the touch. But the hands didn’t stray, not once as they gently rubbed your shoulders. You think you could faintly hear the sound of a voice, muffled and quiet against the walls of your despair. It sounded almost soothing, but you could barely hear it at all. 

You think you heard your name, far away in the distance and not from the voice that seemed to be talking your ear off religiously. Your unfocused eyes shook as you tried to focus on them towards the horizon, the orange turning to a dark black the closer night was upon the land. 

Squinting you realized that it was Dottore who seemed to be comforting you, kneeling down in front of your hunched form and seemingly comforting you. You sniffled loudly, hands blindly going to tug at his shirt. You don't know why you were tugging so insistently, but the Doctor shook his head and picked up up. You felt a small pressure against your head at the same you felt a pinch in your arm. Your watery eyes looked up again, darkness enshrouding your vision. The last thing you did before you blacked out was glare and hopefully curse his family lineage.

"So Timothee, you're young, and as young people do, they get crushes, any crushes as of late?" Ellen turns towards Timothee who was on the couch next to Armie, "And remember, I'm married so…"

Timothee laughs, slapping his knee, he makes a strange face, "Well…" He and Armie look over at each other, inciting cat calls from the crowd.

"And don't say Armie!" Ellen wags a finger at them, "That's a cop out." The audience laughs.

"I mean… there's that one that you liked waaaay before." Armie points out, "But you told me that it's been years so…"

Timothee shook his head, "Oh, no, no. Totally, totally completely still in play."

Armie looks at Timothee in shock, "I thought you said???" He points at Timothee and makes an X mark with his arms.

Timothee waves his hand in the air, dismissing Armie, "Well she had a boyfriend then, what was I supposed to say?!" He does this weird frantic movements with his arms.

Ellen chimes in, "Is this the same one you told me about a year ago?"

Timothee looks at her, blinking as he bit his lip, wondering if he should answer, "I mean, yeah. Pretty much, there's really only been her." He shrugged while wringing his hands.

Ellen pats his knee, "You seem a little tense there, Timmy. Are you good to go?"

Timothee flinches, "What are you planning?" He squints at Ellen as the audience laughs, "I know you! I swear, knowing you, you have something planned! She's like behind that curtain right?! Oh my god I'm just gonna run off the stage-" His face was all red as he stood up, fidgeting around.

Armie pulls at his hand to get him to sit down, "We're just gonna play a couple of games!" He chuckles, "Calm down, Timmy."

"Alright." She claps her hands, "For the first game, we'll be playing Who'd You Rather." The audience cheers.

"We can't play that!" Timothee looks from Ellen to Armie, "There's two of us!"

Armie snorts in laughter, "I thought you were gonna say we can't play that because you're in a committed imaginary relationship with your crush." He slaps his knee acting like what he said was the most hilarious thing he's ever come up with.

Ellen shrugs, "We're not playing it for the both of you, YOU'RE playing it. Armie's just here to tell us if you're lying. The man is MARRIED, Timothee!" The audience busys out in laughter.

"Alright, here we go!" She nods to the technical crew at the side, and the screen flashes to a picture of you and a picture of Betty White and he busts out laughing.

He wipes his eyes from the tears that formed, and squints at Ellen as the audience teases Timothee, "Well Betty White is pretty hot for a grandma, but I'm gonna have to go with Y/N." His ears go red as the audience's cheers get louder.

"Alright, how about now? And remember, you can't lie. Armie is gonna bust you." Betty's picture is replaced by Camila Mendes and Timothee just smiles.

"Still Y/N." He says it instantly like he didn't even NEED to think about it. More people start cheering when they started to realize what this meant as Ellen looks to Armie who's given her a thumbs up.

Ellen nods, Camila's picture replaced by Emma Watson, "I have to go with Y/N here." Timothee shrugs while Armie's giggling in the corner.

"Really? It's Emma Watson, it's Hermoine Granger." Ellen looks at him strangely, "We have mentioned in passing that she finds you cute."

Timothee shrugs awkwardly, "I mean, it's Y/N. Just look at her!"

Ellen snaps her fingers, like her plan was foiled, "Okay! Next!"

Emma Watson gets replaced by Ellen's picture as everyone laughs.

"Well we're on your show, so I pick Ellen!"

"This is why I wanted you to pick Emma Watson!" She laughs.

The picutre changes to some photoshoot you did a couple of months ago.

He shakes his head while Armie's giggles turned into full blown out laughter, "I knew it!" The crowd laughs, "Are there more pictures?" He looks from the tech crew to Ellen, "I pick Ellen again."

Ellen nods at the crew, your face disappearing only to be replaced by a different picture of you.

He looks like he's pondering for a second, "Ellen."

Your picture changes to another photo of you, this time a photoshoot you did with GQ, you were barely wearing any makeup and were in a swimsuit.

"Oh, wow. Look at her, yeah. That's the one, she's really pretty in it. Let's keep that one. No point in giving me more choices, you already know who I'm picking." He grins at the screen.

"Alright, well that's all the time we have today." Ellen looks at Armie who's still laughing on the floor, "He's too giddy to say anything. Young Timothee, do you have anything you want to say?"

He points into the camera, "We start filming on the Call Me By Your Name sequel in a few months from now so be sure to watch the first movie!"

Armie shoots him a look, "I think there's MORE you want to add, Timmy."

Timothee smiles while closing his eyes and slowly shaking his head at the floor, he opens his eyes, looks sheepish with his hand placed behind his neck, "Y/N, if you're watching this… I'VE HAD A HUGE CRUSH ON YOU FOR YEARS NOW!" He scurries to hide his face before popping it out again, "And don't forget to also watch The Greatest Showman… she's in it!"

---------

You click your phone on lock and stand up to help Tina, but your mind is already miles away. That was shot a few months ago, probably 3 or 4 months ago, and just released yesterday. It's gonna be huge when your interview gets released, you literally won the game by choosing Timothee anyway, and over your ex boyfriend nonetheless, the same ex boyfriend who's been calling you for a while now. You click your phpne on lock when his name pops up again on caller id.

"How am I supposed to move on from you when you try to talk to me all the time?" You mumble tp yourself before walking over to Tina, still folding your clothes.

You shoo her away, "I'll continue here. You go rest."

Three knocks are heard at the door right when Tina gets up so she shuffles her feet to the door, opening it wide.

It was Timothee. You feel your face heat up, as he waited by the doorway, his arm pressed against the door frame, his body leaning toward it, "Armie told me to pick you guys up."

Tina shoots you a knowing grin, "Timmy! Right on time!" She pats his chest, walking past him, "I was going to book a taxi to bring some of these over to Armie's, why don't you keep Y/N here company?" She gives you a sly wink, "Don't forget to ask for your credit card at reception."

You already expect him to reject the offer, to instead say he'll bring the baggage himself so Tina can stay here, but to your surprise, he shrugs noncholantly, "Sure thing. We'll see you later." He raises a hand to say goodbye before slamming the door shut behind him.

You watch him for a bit as he stood awkwardly in the middle of the room, you notice the nervous gulp he makes that has you shaking your head, "Th-there's water by tje fridge." You eyes are on him but you point at the water bottles above the fridge, his neck turning red. You know you weren't looking too good either. Your face felt all hot while you both avoided eye contact.

He clears his throat, "Do you, uh, do you have anything planned for tomorrow?" He tries to cooly place his hand on the table only for it to flip on a brochure you left on top of it earlier, his whole body falling to the floor and his chin taking the fall a little harder than the rest of his body.

"Oh my god!" You jump up and run over to him.

He's covered his face face with both his hands, you expect blood, tears and some screaming, but instead he's laughing. You move to grab his wrists and pull them away from his face that's turned all red as he tried to reel in from the embarrassment he just experienced and soon enough, you're laughing with him.

"I tried to be cool." He wheezes in laughter, just stitches on the floor, "But I'm not cool. Not in the slightest." He laughs harder.

You stare at him, your giggles already dying down and you shrug, "You're pretty cool I guess… as long as you don't talk." You laugh again.

"How about we prove that little theory of yours?" He lifts his upper body, his elbows already lifting him up as he laid on the carpet, his eyes shifting to yours.

You feel your face get hot when he licks his lips, and from there it's as if that's all you could focus on until a yodelling sound comes from your phone, you already knew it was Tom from the ringtone alone.

You break eye contact, hearing Timothee sigh before falling back on the floor, did he want something to happen between the two of you? Well that was a stupid question, now that you've watched his Ellen appearance. You scramble to get up and run over to your phone, sliding the screen to answer the call without a second thought.

"Hello?"

"Hi Y/N." Your beating heart instantly calms down upon hearing his voice.

"Hi, what time is it there? Is everything okay?"

"It's about noon here. Sorry for bothering you, I know it's a bit late there, but would you happen to know where my bloody shirt is? The button down one, just the plain royal blue. I remember you packed it for me the last time I went to LA and I can't seem to find it anywhere." He sounds nervous, and you smile to yourself.

You feel yourself relax, falling to sit on your bed, there was no way Tom didn't know where that shirt was because he wore it yesterday, you knew because Harrison sent you a selfie of him and Tom together and he was wearing it.

"Yeah." You clear your throat, "You you see your suitcase?"

"Yeah." He speaks slowly, "It's right here."

You take a breath, speaking slowly too, just to make this last, "If you open it, you'll need to take out all your clothes."

He takes a few seconds, you don't hear him shuffling his clothes around but he answers, "Yup, okay, everything is out."

You feel tears prick your eyes, "And you should feel around the compartment and you'll feel a zipper on the side."

"Okay." You missed his voice.

You sigh, "If you open it up, it should be there."

He laughs nervously, "Yeah, it's right here." The line is quiet for a while, "Thanks, Y/N."

"I miss you too, Tom." You smile into the phone when he chuckles.

"I can never get anything past you, can I?"

"Not a damn thing, Holland."

Your eyes flitter over to the beautiful curly haired boy sitting on the floor of you room and you finally realize, you weren't alone and it wasn't the place to be talking to Tom intimately like this, you clear your throat, "I-I uh, I have to go. I have to finish packing."

There's intrigue in his voice, "Oh? You're moving?"

You shrug, keeping your eyes on Timothee who had his head turned towards the bathroom, even though you both knew he was listening in, "Yeah, we found a place to stay indefinitely and Tina had things to do earlier so we couldn't pack and move until I got home."

There's worry in his voice now, "Until you got home? Y/N, it's late there. Have you really just gotten home? Where have you been the whole day? Where are you two even staying?"

You sighed, irritated at his concerned tone, like he was prying into your life when he technically had no say in it anymore, "I was out with Armie and Timothee. We went looking around, it got a little late but I'm fine. It's literally a small town in Italy, Tom.  I'm not going to get stabbed out of nowhere or something. We're staying at a villa Armie owns since most of the crew is already staying with Luca."

He sounds tense on the other end, "I was just concerned about you, Y/N-"

You hated it when you and Tom were like this, fighting, butting heads at the smallest things, one of you would get a little two oversensitive and the other would be unrelenting but a part of you kind of understood that this happened because you two cared too much, felt too much, doesn't make it healthy though.

"You don't exactly have the right to feel that way anymore, do you?" You snap, "Not after what you did." Your voice is all venom that it shocks you but you do notice the slight upturn in the corner of Timothee's lips

Tom sighs, "Yeah, I guess I don't. But I apologized."

You start to get angry, "And suddenly that makes it better?! Suddenly that completely erases the fact that you-you-" You hear your voice crack and felt tears fill your eyes, you weren't sure if it was because you felt sad or because you were frustrated with him, by now you notice that Timothee who was discretely listening just seconds ago was now directly looking over at you, a worried expression and furrowed eyebrows planted on his face, "Nevermind." You sigh, "We always do this to each other. And I can't get into it with you tonight." You hang up on him.

You fall back on the cushioned chair, a tense and awkward silence lingering in the room and Timothee takes it upon himself to break it.

He lets out a long whistle, "Intense." He nods slowly, "If that were me on the other end, I think I'd cry."

You snort in laughter, "I know you'd cry." The anger in your chest dissipates at the shit eating grin on Timothee's face.

He shrugs, "I don't think I ever expected to see you like that ever." He laughs, "If I'm being honest? Pretty hot." He give you the okay signal with his hand.

You roll your eyes, Timothee was definitely a flirt when he got comfortable.

"I can't believe I actually thought you hated me before." You laugh, "OR that you were too cool for me to hang out with you."

He crosses his arms, "Hey! I'm cool enough!" He starts walking over to you, his arms still crossed, "I hang out with the sexiest risk taker, I'm cool to the bone-oof!"

You laugh out loud when he trips over your luggage and that heaviness in your chest completely disappears, and you make a mental note to thank Timothee because you knew exactly what he was doing.

He's still on the floor, "This carpet it really nice."

You smile at him, you and Tom were always emotions first, passionate, first loves, intense, and all consuming. Timothee brought a new kind of relationship, he was lighthearted, the boy next door type, the type of boy who could and would make you laugh for hours on hours, the kind of person you KNEW wouldn't break your heart, it was refreshing to experience a different aura, a more innocent feeling. But the question here is why were you comparing your relationship with Tom with the one you were building with Timothee? Did you expect it to become romantic? Did you want it to? Was it platonic? You shook your head, if Timothee's Ellen interview was anything to go by, there was no way Timothee thought of you in a platonic way.

"Timothee?"

"Hmm?"

He'd been quiet while you were thinking, "What are you thinking about?"

He blinks at you, once  twice, "Oh, I was just replaying that fight you had with your ex on the phone."

You scoff, noticing the way he said it and the way he looked when he did.

Timothee Trivia #7: He was honest, brutally so.

"Then wipe that shit eating grin off your face."

Timothee Trivia #8: He might possibly actually like you.

His grin turns into a smirk then he winks and you feel something in you awaken.

Ammendment: