this is relevant to far gone and out i just don’t know how
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this is relevant to far gone and out i just don’t know how

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Wide eyed
Back at it again with more Everest art & her poem book!! Again based off of Far Gone and Out by @carnalhaus
Song I think fits the fic
Transcript below
I think often of seducing someone, just to see if I could.
I like the look of their eyes going soft and stupid.
I like tricking them. I like winning.
Then I see myself crying through the whole thing. Gagging on the air. The innards of my cheek would go bloody.
because I can’t want anything without imagining the ugliest way of having it.
†
I have been collecting. lining them up in little jars of spoiled jam, their skins wrinkled, their sweetness brined in glass.
Some are the size of my heaving lungs, others sag heavy as wet wool, dripping into the floorboards.
When people speak to me I hear the sound of teeth in fruit. soft breaking, tender lapping at its nectar, sucré stolen from its skin.
depuration.
I would like to believe I am unripe that my hardness is choice, not defect but I have greenness to my flesh beneath that skin, I spoil.
In the evenings I wash my hands until the water goes cool, until I can’t tell the red from shadow, until they smell like nothing.
I keep thinking there must be a way to be touched without leaving fingerprints.
You are a Saptheif.
Far Gone and Out—Chapter 5
Sledge must do something on the weekends. He must have b-plots, and c-plots, and d-plots. Anyone with that face has to. I don't picture him as a party type of person, I think he’s a little too old and a little too jaded for that sort of college-aged stuff. He fits much more in bars, I decide. Small ones with football games and veterans cracking wise ones in the corner. His head would probably just skim the light fixtures they put over some of the nicer tables, dark shadows making him look more like a phantom than a man.
(aka, an 8.5k chapter to make up for my absence)
Far Gone and Out—Chapter 4
I didn’t look down while it happened. I let the darkness be my cover, blinding me from my own doing. I was bottomless where I laid, everything that tried to fill me only dripping through the hole. Sopping.
i’ve mentioned this somewhere else, but the actual location far gone and out is set in is washington, pennsylvania (about 30 minutes outside pittsburgh proper). i actually stayed in pittsburgh for a little while recently, and of course i was thinking of this the whole time. everclear, pixies, and pj harvey was the soundtrack the whole time.

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in the actual document of far gone and out, the cover page has lyrics from you make me feel like a whore by everclear. interpret this how you will.
Far Gone and Out—Chapter 3
I think he’s smiling, or he’s trying to. More than that, he pulls the expression of a dog caught digging through the trash, his mouth pulled taut in what could be a frown of submission. Submission—that makes me sick.
chapter 5 draft