Chapter 4 of Fur and Flesh
The fourth chapter! Get attached to my characters >:3
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“Dandi. What’s up? Talk to me.”
Beni was treading water, fighting against the river’s current. The early afternoon sun beat down on them, making the cool relief of the water very welcome.
“About what?” Dandi dived under the water, dodging the question. He resurfaced, and Beni was waiting with her arms ploughing through the water, creating a wave that sent Dandi spluttering.
He recovered to see Beni raising her eyebrows at him, her hooded dark brown eyes narrowed at him. “Seriously?” The nerve of this guy. Her eyes softened. “Look, I know something’s bothering you. And trying to hide it doesn’t work, Dandi, so don’t try.”
Dandi looked away, breaking her eye contact with him. “Thanks for caring and all, but I’m fine. It really doesn’t matter.” Beni groaned and dived under the water, swimming downstream.
She had seen this before. Heck, she’d been there. Beni knew what Dandi was thinking: that he didn’t matter.
Under the water, Beni grabbed Dandi by the ankles and started swimming away with him.
“BENI! Stop!” He spluttered as he bobbed in and out of the water, laughing. She rolled her eyes playfully and let him go.
Cold and wrinkly, Beni spread out on the shore, soaking in the sun. Dandi sat next to her, drawing in the sand.
“Do you wanna talk about it? I’m not the best at comforting, but it’s something, and you look like you need it.” Beni turned to him, his eyebags as big as the lies he told about his sleep.
“Maybe. But it’s not that bad.” He looked down at his flowers he had been drawing. “It doesn’t matter.”
“God you're an idiot.”
“HEY! Why?!”
“You think it doesn’t matter? What the fuck? No matter how small, it matters.” Beni sat up, and stared right into Dandi’s eyes. “You matter, stupid. Don’t think I don’t care, you’re one of my best friends. I like you, you’re a good friend, the least I can do is be here for you.”
Dandi blushed and looked away. “I- not-” He said shyly.
“Jesus, learn to take a compliment.”
“Hmph.” He huffed, folding his arms. He looked back at Beni, “Would it be okay?”
She nodded.
“Um… I don’t really know how to start.”
“Well, what have you been thinking about when you space out?”
“The outside I guess. I miss it.” Dandi sighed wistfully, putting his head in his hands.
“Me too.” Beni followed suit, staring out at the sparkling water.
“But… I guess that’s not it. I miss the sun, trees, oceans, and animals, but I don’t miss my old life.” His eyes darkened, troubled by memories brought up by thinking about life before the cave. “I don’t remember much, whether that’s because of the amnesia… or because my brain tried to block it out.”
“Same boat. The amnesia is weird around trauma.”
“Mm. Like it’s fighting your brain, it wants you to forget, but your brain thinks you need it for survival.”
Beni laughs. “It’s wrong though, stupid brain, I don’t need these memories!”
Dandi grinned awkwardly. “I suppose so, but part of me wants to fight it and keep them. They almost feel like part of me.”
“Baaad idea friend. Don’t hold onto the past if you don’t have to.”
“Maybe. I don’t know. They’re what I’ve got left of the outside. Of my mum.”
Beni cocks her head. “Was she nice?”
“My mum? Yes! She was always so nice to me and my… my sister June, letting us play outside at night, protecting us from dad, sometimes cooking dinner for me so I could look after June… letting me stay after what happened to June…” Dandi trailed off, lost in thought.
She held her hand up and pinched her nose bridge with the other.
“What the actual fuck.”
Dandi laughs nervously, looking at Beni’s horrified face.
“God… Your mum actually fucking sucked.”
He rubbed his eyes, laughing. “Yeah. She really did.” He flops back onto the sand.
Beni follows him, staring up at the sky, her view half covered by the overhang.
“I didn’t know mine,” she looked back at Dandi, “Not saying that that makes your problems less. I mean, I don’t want to remember mine. And you don’t need to want to remember her just because she’s your mum. Don’t hold onto the things that hurt.”
Dandi sighed. “I guess so, but I’m not sure I can forget her. What she said stayed with me, like I’m hearing her say it again every day. Or really what she didn’t.”
“Stuff your brain made up?” Beni asked.
“Yeah. She never said it straight to my face, but I think she hated me. Especially after June…”
“Later.” Beni finished before Dandi could get lost in thought.
He nodded and breathed in. “Right… The only vivid memories I have are of losing her and how Mum and Dad treated me afterwards. He left after a month. She… I think in the end she left too. And the fact that I fucked up so badly that they all left me… That’ll never leave me. No matter how hard I try to forget. I’ll always be reminded that I failed and I’ll never be enough to stay for.”
Beni was quiet for a moment as they sat, watching the river flow past.
“It’s okay, Dandi. It’s not your fault.”
He looks away, but Beni could tell he wasn’t completely reassured. “But-”
“No buts. You were just a kid.”
“I know. Logically I know that,” he groaned and put his head in his hands, “but there's a difference between logically knowing and emotionally knowing.”
“Heh, yeah, I get that. Just remember-” Beni looked calmly at Dandi. “You’re enough for me. For everyone here. You underestimate what you mean to us, you know. ”
“Yeah… okay. Thanks Beni.” He sighed, dragging his fingers through the sand.
“Anytime.” She smiles.
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It was late afternoon, the sun dancing on the river, the shadows lengthening, and Eden came down the slope to the river, carrying two apples. They were shorter than Beni, but held themself with genuine confidence. A blue bandana was tucked into their belt loops for when Eden needed to tie their soft ginger hair that currently fell around their freckled face and brushed their bare broad shoulders and the straps for their hand-made singlet. Beni wanted to soak in every detail of them every time she saw them.
“Alright Dandi, time up. My turn with Beni.”
Dandi rolled his eyes and got up. “Hello to you too.”
“Yeah, yeah. We’ll see you at dinner. You might want afternoon tea though, August and Callie are there right now.” They said, smiling.
He left quickly, walking towards the cafeteria.
Eden smirked and sat down next to Beni, kissing her cheek. “How’d it go?” They asked.
“Not bad, he didn’t tell me everything, but I got him to open up. He’s dealing with a lot - mostly baggage from his family. He didn’t mention Riven though.”
Eden nodded. “I expected that. He definitely has mummy issues.”
Beni laughed quietly, “Yeah, but I’m worried about him “
“I am too. He tries to hide it, but he’s not happy. And he thinks making other people happy will make him happy.” Eden sighed, “Not to mention that out of all people he’s trying to help Riven.”
“I think he knows that.” She exhaled, “But just because he knows it won’t work, doesn’t mean that he won’t try. And I know as well as anyone that it’s hard to break patterns.” Beni finished sadly, and looked out across the river.
“But you also know as well as anyone that you can.” Eden said gently, and reached over to Beni’s face, pulling her into a kiss. She melted into it, hoping they didn’t mind her cracked lips.
Eden laid back onto the sand. Beni laid back too, curling up against them, nestling her face in their copper hair, breathing deeply. Their smell made her giddy.
The sky was darkening as they laid there entwined, the stars slowly appearing in the twilight sky.
Eden turned to Beni, “Hey Bee, you see that one really bright star?”
Waking up from her sleepy comfort, Beni lifted her hand to the sky pointing, “That one?”
They smiled, “Not quite.” Eden took her hand and moved it so it pointed at the brightest star. “That’s Venus. The hottest planet in the solar system, and named after the Roman goddess of love.”
“She must really love me to bless me this much.” Beni looked straight into Eden eyes as she spoke, smiling when she saw their cheeks blush.
They laughed softly, “Not as much as I love you.” They took Beni’s still outstretched hand in theirs, bringing it closer to them. She kissed their face again and again.
“I'm glad that it’s you that I’m stuck here with.”
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Feels pointless saying this, but please don't steal or feed in to ai
This is a first draft and will not be perfect! This version is more of a trial of the story, to see if I can finish a project and if people are interested!
Constructive criticism appreciated
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Notes
First time writing sappy scenes. I was really excited for it though.
