#fatperson

My hooman bites. #tbt canino #goiabarichard #goldenretriever #fatbelly #fatperson #dogperson #dogson #dog #bites #dog (at Bairro Copacabana Pampulha) https://www.instagram.com/p/B5Jf0L_ndDe/?igshid=1nsrb0pt64y3r

My weakness is cream puffs with vanilla custard/pudding. #fatperson

Sometimes life is really hard. Ok. Life isn't that hard, we make it hard. But for fat people, its harder. Yes I'm fat. I'm not that kind of person that needs help to get up of the bed or have height enough to get in the show "The Biggest Loser". But I am that kind of fat person that have the sexiest sister in town. I'm not writing here just because I want you to know how I'm jealous of my little sister for not having the same body, up because is my fault. The truth is that I love to eat. And its ironic when I think that I hate when people stare at me when I'm eating. I just love it. Its really true love, cuz I can even explain it. Although, this post its about my motivation. It may be a little confuse, but this is the story how I get motivated: Since February I've been doing this diet and I was so exited because my friends were always saying that I looked thinner, even my family, which is strange because they never said it before, and believe me, half of the last four years was all about diets. I think I even I'm aloud to get the master in nutrition. In May I was seek of salads and not get what I wanna eat and make me eat that stuff. So I start eating again. At the begging I was so happy that I thought that that happiness would be bigger than the happiness of getting the body I've always wanted. But yesterday when I get home to get ready to a dinner with my girls, I started crying. I was in front of the mirror crying, and it never ever happened before. I was angry. I was sad. I am really disappoint with myself. I wasn't enable to choose a cloth to put on. I changed it like million times. I felt ugly and fat. And then another million thoughts came out. Why I'm always complaining that I don't have a boyfriend and Why when I go out guys always wanna meet my friends and not me, and I realize that if even I hated myself how I can get other people to like me ? In that moment I let myself down and I wasn't capable of getting me up. I was thinking in all the strength that I had when I was in diet and how I ruined everything. So I went to my friends dinner. And it was pizza. Can you tell me a person who doesn't love pizza ? And I was sad and I saw the food as my best friend, but as soon as I started eating I start realizing that that wasn't the way to get over it. So I slowly stop eating. This morning, when I was taking my breakfast, the bread tasted like fatness and sadness. So wrong choose of mine, I ate it the fast I could. After I started thinking in my life. In the person I wanna be. That I have to have goals and don't give up as I always do. The truth is I never in my life was a thin person, and that is a thing I can change and makes me unhappy and I don't give all I can in such an important thing as this is for me. So my motivation was my sadness. It was the good thing in the storm. -M