#fat bride

I have a lot of cute outfits lined up for my various bridal showers and bachelorette parties coming up. I have this white and purple floral dress with a lacy over-piece that just screams BRIDAL and I'm so excited to rock it.

I have settled into a cozy acceptance for the time being of being a fat bride. I'm excited to be able to enjoy food and the festivities surrounding my wedding with full gusto, rather than guilt or restriction. I'm evening feeling okay thinking about wedding photos - being ok mentally with my body image is one thing, but being captured by someone else is another thing. I'm going to try to and just enjoy the day and see if my radiance and joy can be captured in addition to my weight.

Speaking of weight, I don't actually know my weight. I'm pretty sure I've made it over a year without weighing myself. For a long while I was slowly re-gaining sizes, but I've been hanging between a US Size 20-24 for quite a few months now. When I am having anxiety over my body / weight, I try to remind myself that even just staying at a consistent size is ok, compared to perpetually gaining. I don't have to be working towards being small - I'm allowed to just exist.