#fandom moms

I am aware of that. Thanks for pointing it out to me though, so helpful...

So this woman comes in today, and she's older--by which I mean older than me--like late 50s early 60s. We start talking, and she cannot keep her mind off of her favorite TV show. It's some show called Yellowstone, which I've barely heard of and I'm not invested in (anyone who follows my Tumblr knows that I am completely hyperfixated on The Untamed.)

But she can't stop talking about it, and she is absolutely rhapsodic. The acting, the scenery, the theme song, the drama! She is obsesssssssssed.

So I'm like, Sis I hear you, I'm like that with my show too. And she's like... "Probably not. It's becoming a problem for me. People think I'm weird. My own mother thinks I'm crazy." She has grandchildren!

Turns out, she is taking a pilgrimage out to the Midwest so she can go see the set where the show is done. She goes on to tell me that this is not the first thing that has made her feel like this. She was obsessed with Garth Brooks about a decade ago, and she had to go and meet him.

I explained to her that I'm the same way with my fixations, and I asked her if she could possibly be on the spectrum. (Because I am, and so is my son. We are both diagnosed autistic.) She had no idea how this related to her, but we talked about it and she said it was like somebody had just opened the window to her mind. Her life made sense.

We continued to talk at length about that wonderful feeling you get when you hyperfixate on something like this. She said it's like love, or like a drug, that nothing soothes her like sitting down to just be and exist with her new favorite thing. She understands that people think she is weird, and that she's acting like a little kid, but she can't stop and she doesn't want to, because it's a thing that makes her happy and makes her feel fulfilled.

She talked about how she always desires to share her love of the show with other people. She needs to talk to her friends about it all the time, so that they can "scream about it together." 😆 Only, none of her friends seem as obsessed as she is, and she feels like either they are missing out, or she is some kind of freak. Or both.

Then, my friends, I introduced her to the concept of fandom. 🙌🙌🙌 I told her about fan art, and fanfiction, and communities. After our session, I helped her set up her iPhone so that she could have the theme as her ringtone, this way she could connect with her obsession for short intervals during the day.

Next week, maybe I will even tell her about AO3, and how to follow hashtags.

And I spent a lot of time assuring her that her hyper focus was harmless. It's not hurting anyone, and all it's doing is bringing her joy. She is a productive member of society, she fulfills all of her roles and responsibilities, so where is the harm in loving something like this? It can't hurt you, and it can't hurt anyone else. I can't imagine not loving things this deeply. I really can't understand how other people get through life without being this passionate over things. It is such a joy.

1) Molly Weasley, Harry Potter series

2) Maria Von Trapp, The Sound of Music

3) Anne Shirley Blythe, Anne of Green Gables series

4) Iduna, Frozen

5, 6, 7)  Kiki, Amy, Carla, Bad Moms (three for one!)

8) Dr. Vishwakumar, Never Have I Ever

9) Mrs, Bennet, Pride and Predjudice

10) Rainbow Johnson, Black-ish