#family issues...

at least i make an attempt to appease mom when i must talk to her.

He has another family. 

My mom was recently diagnosed with diabetes and my grandma has arterial hypertension. 

And he had to choose today to argue with my mom and not only that, but call her and my grandma a pair of bitches. I'm pretty sure he called me that too. The argument got really bad because I heard glasses or maybe plates being broken and stuff being thrown around the kitchen.

In a way I can't wait to move out of here, but I don't want to leave my mom and my grandma alone with him, for some reason he's not as agressive with me as he is with them, so when it looks like he's about to start a fight with them and I'm there I just tell both of them, be it my mom and my grandpa or my grandma and grandpa to shut it and just eat in silence, or for my grandma to go upstairs and rest. 

I fucking hate myself for not being there tonight and I don't know what I'll do if my mom gets ill because of him :(. I know it's bad to hate people, especially him because overall he hasn't been a terrible grandfather, but his job as a husband and a father are a fucking failure. 

And I don't want the best women I've ever me to be subjected to him anymore. I just want him to move the fuck out with his other family. Yes, his other fucking wife and his other fucking children and grandchildren.

Please help me, I don't like feeling like this. I feel like I'm going to go downstairs and punch him in the chest. I don't even care about his surgery anymore if he's using it as a fucking lame excuse to do whatever the fuck he wants to my family. 

you sleep,eat,shit,shave,shower,leave your fucking ugly, smelly, stupid dog, create tension in someone elses house, and you have a very expensive house of your own that is furnished on the back of your mother's own savings to move out of this shit hole in the Bronx......

what? you want to leave your fucking brick box in mint condition and fuck up someone elses shit?

ugh...

I don't care but I will never do that to my parent..if she even gets to see me become a professional....

I hope I can at least have her to spend my first check on a vacation to Puerto Rico or something... 

because thats something he never did either..

he traveled the world with women he ended up cheating on...ended up hating...

...some role model..

well, at least hes showing me what not to do...