#falina.

WANTED CONNECTIONS.

➥ her former command sergeant ( age utp / cis man / fc utp ) : his personality is entirely utp, as well as whether he ever actually had feelings for her, or even whether he knows the details about what truly happened to their children, and how he feels about her disappearing.

DIGGING DEEPER.

TW : pregnancy, child death, kidnapping

chapter 1 ( your time is borrowed ) : clay’s entire childhood had been the army. the only home she’d ever known, the only family she’d ever known. the chief warrant officer was like her father, her warrant officers were akin to uncles and aunts, and the kids she grew up with sisters, brothers, cousins. clay grew up fiercely loyal to the east atlantic army, believed with all her might in what they did, in the good they brought about, the measures that had to be taken to preserve peace and life. under no circumstance had she ever considered that they might lie to her; what purpose would they have for doing that? clay took a principled approach to her studies, sucking up every bit of information that was offered to her, finding her particular niche in physical education and biology—she didn’t know what she wanted to do with all this information and all the skills she was being taught, just that she’d want to make the world a better place. maybe she’d become a warrant officer herself, when she got older?

chapter 2 ( the die is thrown ) : ultimately, the decision was made for her, and if she’d said she minded too much, it would’ve been a lie. the chief warrant officer knew what was best, oversaw all the goings-on at the academy, knew the skills and weaknesses of every student that passed through the academy’s halls, so why would she question their judgement? so she went through boot camp with the same fervour as she’d gone through the academy. lithe and small as she was compared to most others, clay knew not just her own body, but the bodies of others; the biology she’d been so enamoured with growing up, spent hours reading up on, proved vital in a hand-to-hand combat situation. there’s no need to be strong and big when you could hit someone at their weakest points and eliminate them before they even realised what had happened. by the time she graduated as a specialist, she’d earned the name ‘claymore’ after claymore mines, the way she knew how to rip anyone apart in a calculated manner, with devastating results.

chapter 3 ( the winter of woe ) : in a fight, clay was deadly, taking down opponents much bigger than herself with seeming ease. on recon missions she was an asset for the way she seemed to be able to contort her body into incredible spaces, able to climb to and balance on things most would see as a death sentence. socially, while quiet, she was warm and easy to talk to, always looking out for those in her unit, including her first sergeant and her command sergeant. it’s how she fell in love—perhaps frowned upon to fraternise with your command sergeant, but at twenty years old, it was the last thing clay would’ve thought about. their escapades eventually lead to a pregnancy, and while the who was unfortunate, in a world where fertility is a very sought-after ability, clay took this as a sign that she was on the right path. while her command sergeant started holding her back from the most dangerous missions, clay insisted to be part of the unit up until the moment she absolutely couldn’t. labour was fraught with its own complications, and it was the first time clay felt she’d kissed the reaper’s cheek before it ultimately passed her by. when they’d stemmed the blood and clay had regained consciousness, the doctor delivering the news of her stillborn tore a wail out of her weak body that could’ve been heard across the world.

chapter 4 ( lock up the rage ) : for years, she struggled with the guilt, as well as regaining the physical strength she’d had before she’d gone through the traumatic labour. she’d dive into books once more, information and learning filling a void newly carved into her heart; her (former) command sergeant would be by as much as he could be, insisting it hadn’t been her fault at all, assuring that he still loved her. it took clay almost four or five years until she got to a place, mentally and physically, that she could pick back up where she’d dropped off years previous. and she threw herself into her work with more energy, more determination, more of a need to prove herself than ever before. when she got pregnant again at twenty-nine, it was with none of the excitement as she had years prior; a dread so intense filled her that it nearly left her unable to function for weeks. but she pushed it away—this time is not last time, and the fact that the stars were aligned to give her this second chance at all meant something. that’s what she believed anyway. this labour wasn’t nearly as complicated as the last had been, and while it surely had exhausted her, she could hear the cries of her baby with her eyes closed, the doctors taking it away to make sure it was healthy. when she woke up from her well-deserved rest, again a doctor stood at the foot of her bed to deliver her the news that her child had been stillborn. this time, no grief filled her. for the longest time, it was a stunned silence that filled the room, as a deep-seated rage filled her up.

chapter 5 ( in the steel and the rags ) : they’d been lying. they’d been lying to her for years and years and years. but clay knew better than to make a scene, as much as she wanted to tear them to shreds. no, she worked to regain her strength, keeping her eyes and ears open about any information shared with and around her, noting it all down. dots connecting, the memory of her childhood tainted from the root; she’d been told her parents had died, and that’s how she came to the academy as just a baby. is that what her children would be told? that she’d died? just like they’d told her they had died. once she felt her body was back to operating strength, she’d broken into the chief warrant officer’s office and taken any and all relevant data she could, bringing it to the one group she felt might be able to take a stand against this monstrosity of moral deficiency: the silver lining militia.

EXTRAS.

( CONNECTIONS. )

dante winters ( friend )

( MEDIA. )

pinterest

soundtrack

( QUICK STATS. )

mbti : infj

enneagram : 9w8

moral alignment : neutral good

temperament : phlegmatic-melancholic

greek god : dicaeosyne

zodiac : aquarius sun ; capricorn moon ; cancer rising

( CHARACTER INSPIRATION. )

faith connors ( mirror’s edge )