#fak x reader

the holidays were encroaching, which meant an influx of people showed up at the er with some sort of ailment. and the main cause of your patients’ complaints? stress. the holidays caused stress: indigestion, heightened anxiety, cooking mishaps, light-hanging disasters, children managing to swallow batteries, and heart attacks. it wasn’t anything new; you knew every year it would happen, which was fine, until the holiday turnaround decided to be a swift punch to the gut. your schedule completely flipped, so instead of dealing with these complaints on the day shift you were so comfortable in, you were placed on nights. you had to be a team player just until the new year when they’d flip you back around again.

it sounded good in theory—the whole being-a-team-player-thing—until you also realized that it left no time for your personal life. you were sitting on a stack of overtime checks and no time to use them except to let your bills passively get paid in the background. you were exhausted, but you weren’t the only one; you weren’t just carrying the burden yourself, but also with your boyfriend, neil, and his two cats named, both named ralph.

the new—not improved schedule—went as follows: neil was on the way out of the door by the time you got home. he was always gentle, seeing you lug yourself and bag inside as he was scooping his keys and cap from the kitchen table. the kitties would happily chirp as they saw you making your way through the door, already having eaten breakfast, but hoping for a little more food from their mommy. you’d lean against his chest for a brief moment, his arms wrapping around your torso and soothing your lower back for what seemed like the shortest moment on earth before he would tilt your chin up and kiss you. he would then follow it with some sort of rambling: “i’ll call you later—uh, no—i’ll have to text you in between gigs. got like a ton’a shit to do before the new year.” or “you are fuckin’ fire, babe. you do it all, mhm? yeah, i notice.” or even “i swear to god we’ll do somethin’ later. we gotta get caught up, okay? yeah, okay. we’re gonna figure it out.” all good things ultimately came to an end because his final alarm would start raging from his phone, reminding him of the work he had planned for the day. no matter what he’d kiss you one more time, squeeze your ass for good luck, and then he’d be gone. which left you and both ralphs to contemplate when the next moment you’d actually get to spend with him.

today was no different, neil was on his way out, having to settle for the normal quick snuggle. his mustache and scruffy, overgrown five o’clock shadow nudged against your ear. striped ralph was perched on the countertop, orange ralph was sliding against your leg as you shoved your bag on the kitchen table to return his hug. your hair was lopsided on your head, your eyes were red and tired, and your body was in desperate need of a shower.

“you look like a million bucks, babe—always, i swear to you i’m not lyin’ at all,” neil mumbled, working soft pecks against your cheek until he met your lips. you smiled through the kiss, accepting his compliment that most people would think was sarcastic, but neil was genuine; he didn’t have the ability to lie well—at all. it didn’t mean it couldn’t make you stifle a laugh because you felt like your entire body was hanging on by a thread as he started to squeeze the plumpest part of your ass, ending his groping with a smack.

if there was any good way to ruin a moment, neil’s phone had that down pact. you felt his body weight press further into you with a loud, annoyed sigh as he silenced the alarm ringing.

“fuckkk,” he exaggerated longly with a grunt.

neil shoved his keys in his pocket and patted striped ralph’s head quickly. “get some rest, don’t worry about the laundry or the dishes, and i swear to god ignore the crack in the bathroom tile i forgot my pliers were in my pants and i accidentally slung ‘em when i couldn’t get my pants off my foot when i went to shower last night and—y’know what? just remind me i need to get the stuff this weekend to fix it when i get the other junk to fix the hole behind our bedframe. oh, and i love you,” he yammered as he made his way to the door, lingering in the frame for just a moment while you managed to almost incoherently mumble a quick ‘i love you too,’ before he shut the door.

you hadn’t fully started processing everything he said until you were in the shower. the hot water was resetting your body for the morning. you were idly going through his words. rest, no laundry or dishes, he’ll fix what he broke—sounds good. you had seen the crack in the tile when you stripped your scrubs, no biggie. the hole behind the bedframe, aesthetically not great, but you didn’t mind it either because that was the night he was rocking the bedpost so hard that the thin wall crumbled.

it had been at least a month and a half since then. the suds cascaded off your body as you used the hand-held nozzle to wash them away, thinking about that particular night the headboard began knocking against the wall in front of you, soon after your head was buried in the sheets, your lower half being split by his shaft, and neil had both hands full of his favorite woman. it was a night where you actually had time to be bent over with a meaty cock. unlike now when you both pass by each other before your respective shifts.

you bit your bottom lip as you angled the nozzle a bit lower, propping your leg against the slick tub ledge for leverage. the stream made you buckle upon impact; it had been far too long since you had gotten any real attention. you huffed, hanging the shower head in its place and blinked tiredly as the stream pelted your face.

the want between your legs was still there, your fingertips trailing over your pubic hair and slightly parting your folds. it felt foreign and a little wrong only because you knew it wasn’t what you were truly craving. you felt defeated, even the subtle rub of your thumb against your clit made you buzz, but how could you even continue? neil, who usually opened you wide, was across town probably fiddling with a project you didn’t want to understand.

it didn’t matter much anyway when orange ralph started pawing at the shower curtain and furiously licking his paw when the water touched him.

you sighed, stepping from your sexless shower and opened the cabinet—out of towels. that would be right, you had only been washing them, not folding them. neil was going to fold the absolutely abysmal pile of laundry that had stacked disgustingly high. so you trekked, shivering to the laundry pile on the sofa and started pulling at random sections until you found a towel.

you rubbed your unshaven legs dry, dragging the cotton cloth around your body until you instinctively clutched it as you heard the doorknob jiggling. the ralphs had darted for the open bedroom, too excited to lie with mommy rather than the guest at the door.

neil reappeared, staring for what he considered an appropriate amount of time at your water-flecked skin. “fuck sorry, well not really for lookin’, but because i scared you,” neil apologized, scooting inside to the kitchen table to shuffle around the mail and half-drunk coffee mugs to potentially find his set of fillet welding gauges. he left them next to his keys every day, and suddenly they had disappeared. the moment he got to the job site he haphazardly plucked through all of his pockets, unable to find the worn leather case that contained his gauges.

“just startled me,” you shrugged, although your gaze didn’t leave him. his thick dickies jacket was not yet coated in the grime of the day, although his brow was sweaty, likely from rushing.

“yeah, sorry but, where are my gauges? did you wash ‘em? did you throw ‘em away? i know i gotta a lot a’shit, but i need those.” his shoulders dropped upon fiddling with the overstuffed junk drawer thinking he had found his among the other crap.

“dammit, no. this is my pocket knife though,” he muttered, shoving it in the interior of his jacket.

you pawed through a few more clothes, feeling his clean uniforms for any lumps in the pockets. neil peered over your shoulder after his rendezvous in the kitchen. his hands found a comfortable spot to rest on your waist.

“anythin’?” he asked as his breath bounded off the top of your shoulder and hit the back of your ear. your body paused for a moment, a little weak in the knees as his hands dragged over your hips out of habit.

moments prior you were poorly attempting stimulation thinking of that particular wall-breaking incident which started with the very same placement of his hands. his wide, tattooed fingers caressing your love handles and pinching them right where your scrubs would dig in after a long day.

“babe, did you find anything?” he repeated, a little slower this time, until you focused on his words.

“what?” you felt his hands loosen, making you straighten your posture, not completely bent over while fiddling with the pockets of his uniforms. “oh no. no, i didn't find them,” you cleared your throat. your face was a little warm and your mind was distracted.

neil’s soft eyes shifted down, raising your towel just an extra inch to peek at the curve of your ass. your searching halted and your heartbeat quickened.

“i found somethin’ better.”

“neil, you’re already late.” as much as it pained you to say and go against every feeling resting deep in your core he did have priorities that did not concern being inside of your cunt that was already slick with arousal.

you tugged the bottom of your towel down as you slid past him. his face dropped, looking like a puppy that had just been bopped with a rolled newspaper for chewing shoes.

“no, i know, but like i’m already here and i probably gonna be more late because i have to go to the hardware store and get another set of gauges.”

you looked over your shoulder, neil’s hand was still raised from peaking under your towel. while shifting from one foot to the other you hummed as he pulled you close to his chest. his rounded face nudging your ear, pressing himself even closer.

“c’mon, i barely get to see you anymore, and now you’re basically naked and you look really fuckin’ hot,” neil continued his coercing although you didn’t have to be convinced. you only brought it up so his conscience wasn’t guilty when he was stumbling over his words in front of richie and carmy when his projects at the restaurant were unfinished.

you exhaled, untucking the cotton towel from where it was rolled close to your chest. it was not a difficult decision to make. neil followed the shape of your body, resting his hand on the bottom of your stomach as your rounded bottom became flush against the bulge of his belly.

a simple gesture which meant i want you allowed his hand to roam further down, cupping the front of your pussy. there you were being complacent in his tattooed palm as he spread your cunt apart and maneuvered through your folds.

he circled your clit, feeling that bud perk up happily for him. noticeably swollen and prominent, your clit was so desperate for his touch. he was slow at first, not wanting to overstimulate you immediately, especially with how wiggly you were from his rubbing.

he didn’t stop until he could drag his fingers from your clit to your slit and it be fully sloppy with arousal—that's where the real fun began.

your eyes immediately closed—just like you remembered—the feel of his middle finger dipping right into your hole. you were fully sat on his middle finger as he reassured you, “i gotcha. i’m holdin’ you so relax, baby. i gotcha i promise.”

your stiff legs relaxed against his weight. soft sighs escaped your mouth, whimpering when he pushed his ring finger inside to spread you further. you steadied your hand on the wall beside you, leaning into the side of your forearm. his digits were swimming in your wetness with an easy and steady motion.

neil was continuously kissing the top of your ear, not minding the awkward angle if it meant you were already singing his praises with a couple of fingers. he was such a pleaser, a fixer, a fucking good man. pumping you full of his fingers to stretch your neglected little pussy before he edged his cock inside—that was love—true love.

his erection was fully stiff, nudging you every time your hips wiggled to bear down on his palm to lengthen his swift, yet carefully adjusted fingers. your arousal only grew, dripping directly into his palm, the overwhelming pool of greed growing in your belly as his digits curled upwards.

“all for me, baby? hm? gettin’ all kinds of worked up for me?” neil teased, while rubbing just below your belly button with his free hand.

all you could do was nod, while the sweat built at your temples. this was so needed; he was so needed. you could do it yourself, but why would you when he was so much more capable? neil knew what you needed and knew the right place to fix your problem. he was edging at your g-spot with a wide smirk on his face as he kissed the side of your head again.

you reached back unsteadily guiding his hand on your stomach to your lips to kiss his fingers. your wobbly legs and moans quickening from his fingers between your folds. they were to the very last knuckle, already filling you so pleasantly but it just wasn’t quite scratching the itch you needed.

“neil, bub, c-can you, uh—” you couldn’t even utter the rest of your question as you gasped. your eyes rolled for a brief moment, crumbling in his palm.

“can i what, baby? what do ya want from me?”

your kissed his hand again, grounding yourself in the very moment you rocked against his slick fingers.

“fuck me. please, f-fuck,” you whimpered as his fingers curled again. you balled your hand into a fist against the wall, a little frustrated with how much you had let yourself miss him. unfortunately, you were even more frustrated with work because caring for others meant you were neglecting neil, and yet he was still caring for you.

neil slipped his fingers out. your burning face was hiding in the side of your arm as he fiddled with his belt and pants. the sound of his zipper. his shirt pulled up to sit on his hairy belly shelf as his uniform jacket framed his figure. his pants and briefs pooled at his work boots as he brought you back against him.

he guided his hardened shaft towards your entrance, stabilizing the backs of his legs against the couch to support you more easily. his tip edged slowly inside of you. he could feel your back muscles tensing against his chest. you squeezed his hand uncomfortably, taking his girth as slowly as he was giving it to you.

“i still gotcha, baby,” neil consoled as he exhaled the shakiest breath. you were already gripping him so tight and he was only halfway inside of your cunt. your walls clenched tightly in anticipation of his entire shaft. “you’re okay. alright? you’re good, baby.”

he was right; you were fine. you had to relearn his size after longing for it. some mornings you’d wake up in a cold sweat after the wildest dreams, thinking you could roll over and teasingly drag your hand across his covered cock, but no. he was always at work. neil was the same, at night with his dick throbbing in his boxers waiting for the moment you might accidentally wiggling your perky little ass against him. that would’ve been a luxury that never came.

“oh my god, bub. fuck,” you whined as his cock sent a full shockwave of pleasure through your body. neil’s hands were gripping you as tightly as your pussy was around his shaft. one arm was across your chest, gripping your chest, caressing across your breasts, and the other was holding your hip to keep you upright.

his thrusts were dizzying, having to continuously rub your face into your bicep to focus on the overwhelming pleasure. the sticky, sweet noises that neil thrived off of were pouring through the room. every motion in your pussy was a step closer to unwinding. his balls knocked against you furiously.

your cunt was creaming around his dick, all your slick building around his shaft and pubes. you were so undeniably wet, his heavy weight only adding to the harsh pace of his rhythmic motion. there was a slight squat in his stance to ensure his stiff manhood was completely coated in your sex.

the upper half of your body was limp, your tits jiggling against the arm he had bracketed around you. your sore legs were throbbing in your calves and thighs, but you had to push through. his cock was nailing your cervix and your walls were squeezing his girth while he panted in your ear.

his eyes were shut tight. you could feel his cock hardening by the second. he was trying to focus on literally anything else but your body, but couldn’t. his solid shaft twitching, your legs getting weaker at the unexpected pressure inside of your cunt.

he couldn’t even utter the words that he was going to cum; he just did. white hot seed filling your already creamy pussy more. he was still fucking into your womanhood, not wanting to give in to his erratic orgasm without letting you finish.

your ass was clapping against his meaty thighs, desperately inching closer to your climax. so stuffed with his cum and dick your eyes abruptly opened. your legs trembled more. your nails dug into his wrist. “y-yeah, oh my god,” you yelped.

neil’s balls ached since they were completely drained, but he had such a greedy erection that still didn’t want to subside while he was surrounded by your pussy.

“right there. right there. right there,” you repeated helplessly, feeling the first hit of your orgasm. your mouth hung wide, pulling his arm tighter around you as you shook. “c-cumming, yeah, bub. i’m cumming.” you gasped, as your legs buckled. that was certain. the feeling you could have a thousand times over again and it would never get old.

as he pulled his cock out unsteadily, you gripped the side of the sofa. your thighs were completely soaked and sticky like his manhood. he made quick work of wiping you both with your discarded bath towel. your head was dizzy having to focus on breathing rather than moving.

neil kicked his boots and pants off lazily then hoisted his boxers to their upright position.

“hey, left foot,” neil mumbled, tapping your ankle, pulling a pair of fresh panties out of the laundry and onto your body. “yep, right foot,” he concluded, kissing the most rounded part of your ass once your underwear was fully situated.

neil rose with a groan then he sat back on the couch creating a divot between his legs for you. he gathered you close again, turning your face just slightly to peck your lips. his burly arms protected your nude chest as you found comfort.

you didn’t realize how much your feet truly hurt until you sat down in the middle of his lap. his cap was crooked on his head and he looked like he was holding back the same level of exhaustion as you. the workload was surely catching up to the pair of you.

“let me sit like this for just a fuckin’ second,” neil complained tiredly, drained from the load he released.

“don’t care as long as i can go to sleep within the next five minutes,” you murmured tiredly.

“i’m just not goin’ to work. carmy can call teddy or sammy or literally anyone else,” neil huffed, eyeing his discarded pants on the floor, knowing any second someone would be calling and asking where he had been after he mentioned he only forgot something at home. “you gotta answer it if they call. and you gotta say i threw up or one of the ralphs jumped out the window or—”

“neil, baby,” you said sternly to fully catch his attention. “if i answer that phone they will not be happy that i did because once i manage to crawl into bed i am not going to be a pleasant person until my alarm at 4:30 goes off.”

he rubbed your arms gently feeling the chill bumps start to arise. he leaned over lazily to the pile of laundry and tugged at one of his tattered garage band t-shirts and pulled it over your head. you groaned as you pulled yourself from the sofa, a twinge of pain in your lower back coming back to play. neil squeezed your hip lovingly as you inched forward lazily to the bedroom. the ralphs were batting the side of the door as they heard your steps on the hardwood.

“imma be right behind you, just gotta make up an excuse.” it was clear that he was anxious, tossing his cap on the table and shrugging off his work jacket. his inability to lie was eating at him not even reaching for the phone under the layers of fabric.

you stopped in your tracks on the way to the bedroom, turning on your heel to find his phone in his thrown pants’ pocket, and also managed to locate the elusive welding gauges while you were at it.

“babe, i swear to god i looked in there,” neil claimed, wide mouthed as you set them on the table. sometimes things had a matter of working themselves out.

you stifled a laugh, only glad to know that his hand had so easily slipped past them previously. “just glad you didn’t look well enough.”

and with a simple text to carmen you hope it would be sufficient.

neil: my lady needed help. super sick. see you tomorrow.

Carmen:

Heartbroken, thinks about it all day

Because he didn’t say anything you assume he didn’t notice, but he noticed

You forget and kiss him when he comes home, but he tries to avoid it :( 

He spends all night trying to bring it up, but probably won’t

Please don’t do it to this poor man

Marcus

You give him a complex

Will laugh it off in the moment, but like Carmen he is thinking about it all day. 

Were his lips too dry? 

Buys lip balm and when you don't wipe away his kiss the next time he vows to always have lip balm.

You think the sudden amass of sweet-flavoured lip balms around the apartment is cute and you start sharing them and trying to guess what flavour he’s wearing today

Sydney

She’s always so busy, she didn’t even realise until she was out the door and sat on the L reflecting upon the morning, she was in such a rush.

When she gets home you are in for it.

She saw this prank and was planning on doing it to you first!

 She kisses you head to toe with spit-slicked lips and a glint in your eye until you’re begging for her.

She might not have gotten to do the prank, but she thinks she got the last laugh in the end. 

Luca

I’m sorry, but he will chase you around the boat threatening to spit and lick you in revenge. 

Gets his hands on your hips and pulls you up and into him and falls back onto the sofa (No matter your weight this man is ripped!) 

Sucks the wettest most disgusting hickey into your neck 

Sucks the wettest most disgusting hickey into your neck 

Definitely spits on you later

Still Hungry? Here is our Menu:

Would you love me if I was a worm?

Would you peel my orange?