#exo ficiton

It has been a month since the last time you saw Chanyeol. And the last time you saw him was before he bolted out from your house with his car, with tears in his eyes. Every step you go, you couldn’t help but to hear Chanyeol’s name getting mentioned. Whether he’s already found another girl or he’s in bad condition. None, you can believe, you don’t know if any of it is true or not, so it was slowly killing your inside. You don’t really see him in campus ground as well, so you don’t know how he is on his end, you can only hear his condition from mouth to mouth.

“Did you hear? Chanyeol has finally broken up with (Y/N).”

“She never treats him right! She was so… quiet, and Chanyeol was the life of the party.”

“Chanyeol’s grades have drop, that’s, unusual.”

“I heard that he’s going out with Yuna now.”

“I mean seriously, what did Chanyeol see in her?”

It was a torture or you. To walk in campus ground and people are seeing you as the villain. You didn’t bother to correct any of them because you felt like you are the villainand that you’ve hurt Chanyeol’s feelings. You never really care or even bothered by people thoughts’s and what they have to say about you, but this time it does. You started to avoid the crowds more and you’d leave campus ground the second you’ve finished all your classes and volleyball practice. Most of your teammates asked about you and Chanyeol, but you brushed it off, and they seemed pretty annoyed how you respond to it. But you didn’t know what to do. It feels like, ever since you’ve lost Chanyeol, you’ve lost your own common sense in an ordinary conversation with people around you.

           You haven’t been eating well, and certainly not enough sleep because you’re overthinking about everything every single night. You decided you’ll be absent from class today, and also volleyball practice, to get yourself some rest. You’ve spent the day reading the novels you haven’t been touching in a short while. You didn’t have the energy to cook, so you just ordered some food in. During the afternoon, as you were enjoying your fried noodles on the couch, all snuggle comfortable between the pillows and under the blanket, as you were watching a movie, you felt your phone vibrated just under your butt. You pulled it out to read the text, and you felt your social anxiety kicked in.

Nayeon

Hey, are you okay? you weren’t in class.

Are you able to make it to practice?

Hey, can you get down here? coach wants us all here, he has an important announcement.

Be quick!

You texted her back, what is it about, but she didn’t reply, thinking that Nayeon went back on with practice. You let out a heavy, and annoying groan as you got off the couch and turned the TV off. Not even bothered to get changed, you were wearing your shorts and hoodie and to complete the look, you put the hood on over your head, before tightening it around yoru face. You slipped in a pair of slippers before you grabbed your car keys and walked out the house to drive to campus.

           The place you planned to avoid for the day.

You reached campus just before dark out and right on time after practice finished. As you were walking yourself towards the gym, many eyes were darted on you by the students but it didn’t bother you as much.

           “Ah, (Y/N)! I’m glad you can make it! I’m sorry I had to make you drove all the way here while you’re feeling unwell.” Your coach told you, causing eyes to turn to you. You just gave him a small smile before you walked closer to your team.

           “So, I wanted to gather all of you here because I have an important announcement.” He said, putting his board that’s filled with lines and circles aside.

           “(Y/N), I want you to get better as fast as possible, because we’re going to have a tournament starting next week!” He announced excitedly, as your teammates cheered happily getting excited as well while you were just stood there with your hands in your hoodie pocket and your eyes widen. “So, I want you guys to keep your condition healthy, and practice would be twice a week.” He added. Your coach went on and on about practice, and who’s joining the tournament. It was almost like a little briefing before the tournament starts, and you listened to everything he was saying carefully.

           “Alright!” He clapped his hands together as his bright smile appeared on his lips. “I think that’s all I need to tell you guys, get home safely, next practice will on next Tuesday, and I won’t be going easy on any of you guys!” He joked and the girls laughed.

           All of you went into a huddle and did a cheer together before the crown breaks. As you were about to leave the gym, Yuna caught up with you.

           “Hey, have you been feeling okay?” She asked you, and you turned your heels to face her as you nodded your head.

           “Yeah, feeling okay… just needed that time to rest up I think.” You told her, “Is everything okay?”

           “Yeah… everything is okay!” She smiled, but you noticed there was something she was hiding. “Actually, I know you’ve heard about me and Chanyeol right?” She asked you, and you felt your heart sank.

           “Yeah…” You answered.

           “I just want to tell you that… there’s nothing going on with us, we’re just friends and he actually told me a lot and he told me that he didn’t want to be in a relationship at all for the moment, that’s all.” She explained.

           “Why do I need to know this?” You asked, but it came to Yuna as if you’ve snapped.

           “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you… I just thought that maybe you should know…” She said, feeling guilty all of the sudden. You felt guilty yourself because you didn’t mean to snap at her.

           “Yuna—”

           “Oh, shoot, I should go pack! My boyfriend’s going to be mad if I’m not ready! We’ll talk later okay?” She smiled brightly before she lets go of your hand, taking steps back before turning around to get her bag. You turned your heels to walk out of the gym, feeling guilty of how the way you talked to Yuna.

           You walked towards your car, and you noticed the car that was parked right next to yours.

Chanyeol’s.

The last time you saw his car was a month ago. Bolting out from your drive way real fast, screeching the corner. You looked around and you saw there was nobody. You unlocked your car and as you opened the door, about to go in, you heard a familiar voice.

           “(Y/N)?”

           You looked up to see Chanyeol with books in his hands. He was wearing a black t-shirt and jeans with his reading glasses on. He pushed his hair back, showing the muscles in his arm.

           “I heard you didn’t come in to class today, were you okay?” He asked.

           You felt your heart flutters, but yet breaks at the same time. Knowing that you’re not together but he still cares about you.

           “Yeah, I just need a time off from things… I want to rest.” You told him, as he walked closer to you.

           “Well, what’s wrong with Saturday and Sunday? Don’t you rest on those days?” He asked picking a joke, and you chuckled.

           “Well, two days isn’t enough for me, so I had to take the extra day.” You said, giving him a small smile.

           There was a bit of a silence between you two and you didn’t know what else to say.

           “So, what are you doing here?” Cahnyeol asked.

           “Sorry?” You apologized, for not hearing him.

           “What were you doing here?” He repeated.

           “Oh, coach wanted me to come… he just announced that, we’re going to have a tournament in a week.”

           “Oh, that’s fun, be sure you’re healthy for the tournament!” He smiled, before there was another moment of silent.

           “Will you be there to watch?” You asked him, feeling your cheeks flushed in embarrassment as you asked.

           “Of course… I’ll be there.” He smiled.

           You smiled back at him before you noticed there were troubledness in his face.

            “You should get going, Sehun is probably waiting for you.” You told him.

           “Yeah, right… Oh, and uh, (Y/N)?” He stopped on his tracks as you stopped yourself from getting into the car.

           “Can we… I don’t know, talk sometimes?” He asked.

           You felt your heart flutters, and your eyes welling up. But, managed to hold back your tears and gave him a small smile.

           “I would love to chat.” You told him. You saw his troubledness fade and he smiled.

           “Great! I’ll see you around.” He then walked towards his car as you got into yours and turning the engine on.

           You pulled your car out from the parking lot, as Chanyeol gave you a wave of a hand before you waved back at him and drove away from campus ground.

-

Between classes, volleyball practice and your own mental thoughts, it was hard to keep up. You would come home completely exhausted from everything. People were still talking about you, even though the break-up was already old news. They would still get those judging looks, from top to bottom and then you’d still hear those whispers—even when you’re at home you could still hear those words ghosting around your house. You never stayed in campus, even though your teammates wanted you to join a meal together after practice. You turned it down because you told them you were too tired to even do anything else, when your real reason was you didn’t want to be in that social group. You’ve crossed path with Chanyeol a few times, and he’s starting to talk to you more each day.

Today, practice was done before the sun could go down, due tomorrow is rest day and the tournament starts the next day. There was a long briefing after practice before your coach could break the circle so that everyone could go home. You packed your stuffs before you walked out of the gym as you were pulling your hairband. You didn’t bring your car today because you didn’t feel like driving. You just want to sit back and rest.

           As you were turning the corner, you bumped into someone and fell back onto the ground.

           “Oh shit, (Y/N), I’m so sorry!” You heard Chanyeol’s voice.

           You looked up and he was already extending his hand to you. You took his hand before he helped you to get back on your feet. You bend down to grab your bag and patted your butt and the back part of your thigh.

           “You okay?” He asked concern in his voice. You quickly nodded your head, giving him a weak, small smile before pushing your hair back.

           “Yeah, I’m fine… just tired.” You told him, as you felt your legs jiggle from jumping half a day. You noticed the crowd far behind Chanyeol started to whisper to each other as you tighten your grip onto your gym bag strap.

           “Well, I guess I’ll be heading off then.” You said nervo usly, walking past Chanyeol and past the crowd.

           Chanyeol’s eyes followed you, and he overheard what the crowds were saying.

           “I bet she’s finally getting that medicine on treating Chanyeol like a crap!” One girl giggled before the others followed.

           And you stopped on you tracks.

           “She’s such a weirdo! Why did she even agree on going out with Chanyeol in the first place anyway? Clearly she doesn’t love him.”

           “What does Chanyeol even see in her? I don’t—"

           You continued to walk, but this time faster. Chanyeol turned his heels and jogged himself to catch you. As you were walking, with your eyes well up with tears, you legs suddenly felt numb and you stumbled forward.

           “(Y/N)!” Chanyeol rushed to you and you were surprise when you turned around he was already close to you before he kneeled down beside you.

           “Are you okay?” He asked.

           You shook your head, forcing a smile. “Yeah, my legs suddenly just felt numb.” You told him, but he knew that you were in pain.

           “Come here.” He then moved himself in front of you. you were confused at first but you raised your eyebrow.

           “Just get on my back (Y/N), please.” Chanyeol said. You couldn’t see his espression, but his tone was stern. It came out more like a command than asking.

           You slowly got on his back, wrapping your arms around his neck, as he placed his hands around your thigh. He counted, one, two, three to himself before he could get up from the ground. He jumped once as you helped him to shift your position, before he could start walking towards, go knows where.

           “Did you bring your car?” Chanyeol asked, and you shook you head.

           “No, I took the bus today.” You told him in a small voice.

           “Well you’re lucky that I’m still here, I’ll take you home.” He said, and you made a face.

           “No, it’s fine, just drop me of by the gates!”

           “(Y/N), I’m not going to let you get home by yourself, standing in the bus with you jelly legs.” He pointed out, and you stayed silent.

           Chanyeol walked towards the parking lot and you saw his car parked nicely. But somehow, Chanyeol walked past his car.

           “Um… where are we going?” You asked him.

           “I need to pick up a few stuff from the library.” He answered you.

           “But, do you really need to carry me everywhere you go? You could’ve just drop me in your car while I wait for you.” You told him

           He stopped on his tracks and turned around. “Oh yeah, you’re right.” He walked towards his car, before he could gently place your feet back onto the ground. He still had his hand placed around your waist, and you still holding yourself to him. He fished his car keys from his pocket before you quickly struggle to walk towards the passenger front seat.

           “Promise me you won’t take off?” Chanyeol asked, opening the door to the driver’s seat.

           “Yes… I promise.” You told him, and a small smile appeared on his face before she could turn his car engine on. He placed his sling bag and also your gym bag in the back of the car.

           “Stay here, I won’t be long.” He said, shutting the door before rushing away towards the library.

           You were now alone in Chanyeol’s car, with only the sound of the air conditioner and distant voices from out of the car. You turned on the radio so that you don’t feel like you’re going crazy. As you were scrolling through your phone, you heard a knock on the car window and you jumped before you see one of your classmate looking through. You pushed the button, rolling the window down and she was in shock.          

           “It really is you! what are you doing here?” She asked.

           “Um… Chanyeol wanted to take me home, but he needed to pick up a few stuff from the library.” you explained.

           “Really? Right after everything you’ve put him through?” She asked and your heart sank.

“After you made him feel like shit? After you’re not appreciating him? After having himself getting hurt because of you? he’s is still putting up with you?” She asked again but you stayed silent.

           “Wow, he really does have a heart of gold…” She commented making a face.

           “And you’re saying yes because… what? You regret it? You’re going to beg to him to take you back?” She asked, scoffing hard.

           “I’m not, I-I-I’m just—”

           “Be smart (Y/N)… you’re just not worth his time! You’re just going to waste him and dump him again like you did! Youj just don’t appreciate him—”

           “Knock it off Ye-Eun.” You heard Chanyeol suddenly. You turned your head to see only part of Chanyeol’s torso from the diver side window. Before you quickly look back down.

           “Chanyeol, you’re seriously not putting up with her again, are you?” She asked, pulling her head up, guessing that she’s looking towards Chanyeol.

           “Just leave her alone, Ye-Eun… You don’t know her.”

           You heard her scoff again, followed by a mocking laugh. “Come on! The whole campus knows what she put you through! You skipped classes, you’re failing your grades, you were caught drinking, and ALMOST—mind my language—you almost got into a car accident because you were drunk driving!” As you heard it, your eyes widen, eyes started to sting as your eyes welled up with tears.

           “We’re leaving, if you’re going to stay and still say crap about things, be my guest, but we’re leaving.” Chanyeol said, as you herd the driver seat door being open and Chanyeol’s presence were by your side.

           Chanyeol pressed a button that rolled your window up before he could pull his car out from the parking lot and sped away from campus grounds.

The drive was quiet, either you nor Chanyeol said a word. When Chanyeol got into a red light, he came into a stop and the suspense between you two were starting to murder your insides.

           “Is it okay if stop and get something to eat first?” Chanyeol asked finally breaking the ice, turning his attention to you.

           You turn to him and he could clearly see your bloodshot eyes, your eyebags started to get puffy. You pressed your lips together into a line before turning your attention back to the road and you shrugged.

           “Okay.” You answered him in a small voice.

           “If you don’t want to it’s fine I could just—”

           GRUMBLE GRUMBLE GRUMBLE. You felt you face burned turning red, letting your face drop as Chanyeol chuckled.

           “I think a meal sound great now.” You recovered, with a small smile before you both ended up chuckling.

Chanyeol ended up taking you to this small sushi place, and as an addition, it was the first time you’re back here since your first date with Chanyeol.

           “Wow… not much has change in this place.” You said, looking around the place as you both seated onto the booth.

           “Yeah, I haven’t been here since the last time we were both here.” Chanyeol told you, and you just smiled, knowing that it’s his first time back here since your first date with him.

           The waitress took your order and Chanyeol’s before she could take your drinks out beforehand.

           You enjoyed your unsweetened tea while you’re on your phone as Chanyeol watched you.

           He knew how private you are, he knew that you’re not the type of person that can talk easily about your personal feelings. Even when he was still in a relationship with you, some people would talk crap about and you know it. It bothers you, but you never told him. You would always keep those feelings to yourself because you never want to make ‘a big deal’ out of it.  He knew that yourself and Chanyeol are the big talk in campus right now. It’s clear that you’ve heard all it, and he knows so well that it’s hurting you and yet here you are, sitting in front of him, bottling everything up to yourself.

           “(Y/N)?” Chanyeol finally broke the ice between you two. You looked up from your, with the straw between your lips.

           “Are you okay?” He asked you.

           “Are you asking about my legs or…” You trailed of and Chanyeol chuckled.

           “Both.” He answered between chuckle, before his expression turned serious.

           You placed your phone aside, pulling your drink closer to you.

           “Legs are still feeling like jelly… I’ll just run a warm bath at home, it’ll get better after.” You explained to him, and he smiled.

           “And how are you feeling?” He asked, and you stayed quiet for a brief moment.

           Your lips parted with the plastic straw before you could lean your back against your seat.

           “Doing fine.” You forced a smile and Chanyeol sighed, leaning his arms against the table as he pushed himself forward.

           “(Y/N), I know you… you don’t have to lie about your feelings. Everything you’re feeling is valid, so don’t try to hide it.” Chanyeol said, only to make you feel like an invincible hand had slapped your face.

           You looked Down, playing with your thumbs before you look back up.

           “I don’t know what to feel Yeol…”

           “Talk to me then.” Chanyeol started, reaching his hand out to you, “It seems like you always forgot that you have me to lean on. You have me as someone who listens and understands you.” He said, and you could feel your heart racing, ready to cry again.

           You slowly shook your head, “I’m not good with telling my feelings.” You told him, with a smile and he sighed.

           “I know, but you have to know that I was—and until this day, will always be there for you, to listen to you. Through good and bad.” He pointed out and you nod your head.

           Chanyeol let out a heavy sigh before he could pull himself back, leaning against his seat.

           “I heard what people are saying about us—about you.” Chanyeol pressed and you pressed you lips tight together.

           “Aren’t you… hurt by that?” He asked again.

           “I am.”

           “Then say something.” Chanyeol quickly said, moving forward. “I’m worried about you, you know.” He added, but you just stayed quiet.

           Chanyeol shook his head as he leaned back against his seat. He knew that he was only getting frustrated with himself. Pushing you further won’t even get him anywhere near you to talk.

           Throughout the meal, Chanyel didn’t say anything else. He actually talked about classes and other things that doesn’t involved any campus gossips or social events. Chanyeol paid for the meal, even though you wanted to pay yours, he didn’t let you. And the drive back to your place, Chanyeol didn’t start any conversation, because he didn’t know what else to talk about.

           “Here we are.” He said, as he pulled into a stop in front of yoru house.

           “Thanks for taking me home.” You thanked him, and Chanyeol gave you his signature warm smile.

           “It’s not a problem at all.” He said before you could smile back at him. He grabbed your bag from the backseat before passing it to you and you took it.

           “Well, I’ll see you at the game?” You asked before chanyeol nodded his head.

           “You bet you will!” He said.

           You got out from the car, waved him a goodbye before you could walk straight into your house, without looking over your shoulder.

-

You stripped yourself from your clothes before you could dip yourself into the tub, filled with warm water and bath salt. After a long week (what feels like eternity) you decided that you deserve a nice, relaxing warm bath. With a can of soda on the stool and a speaker playing your favorite song. You leaned your back against the tub as you took a deep breath. With your eyes closed, you could feel those muscles relaxed before you heard your phone vibrated against the stool. You looked over to your phone before you could dry your hand with a towel and picked it up.

           “Hello?” You answered.

           “Hey, mind if I come over later?” You heard Chanyeol’s voice. You could hear the thumping music in the background as well, you’re guessing that he’s at a party.

           “Umm… yeah, what time will you be here?” You asked him.

           “Umm… around 20 minutes?”

           “Can you make it 30?” You asked him and you could feel the confusion in the silence between you and Chanyeol.

           “Umm… Okay, sure, I’ll be there in 30 minutes.” He said, before you hund up the phone.

           You placed your phone back onto the stool, leaning back before exhaling a heavy breath. You closed your eyes, trying to calm yourself down before sinking yourself into the warm water.

You put on a pair of shorts and an oversized grey t-shirt before you could dry your hair with a towel. You walked down the stairs to pour yourself a glass of orange juice before you heard Chanyeol’s roaring engine outside. You looked out through your window to see Chanyeol, coming out from his car before walking up to your door. You opened the door for Chanyeol and you were caught off guard as his arms were suddenly wrapped around you. Your hands were up in the air for a few seconds before you could place your palms on his back.

           “Yeol, what happened?” You asked him, getting worried. You tried to pull yourself away, but he just hugged you tighter, only to hide his face from you.

           “Yeol…” You whimpered, and you felt him shaking his head.

           “Yeol, at least let’s get inside first.” You told him, before he finally pulled himself away from you.

           “Okay.” You saw his red puffy eyes hiding behind his falling hair. He stepped inside before you could close the door behind you. You watched him as he kicked his shoes off and sat himself on the steps of the stairs, burying his face on his hands. You walked closer to him, kneeling yourself in front of him before you could slowly hold his hands.

           “Yeol, did something happen?” You asked him.

           “They keep talking crap.” He sniffed, but you didn’t seem to get where and what he was talking about. So you stayed quiet, to let him talk.

           “I was at Jongdae’s party, and people were just talking shit about us…” He started, as he looked up to you, and you quickly knew that it was mostly about you they were talking about. “I mean, most of them know you… they know you’re a closed book kind of person, but they still agree on what the other girls are saying.” He added. “The more I stayed, the more I want to punch someone in the face and just tell them that they don’t know anything—they don’t know you like I do!” He stated, only to tear up a bit more.

           You frowned as you watched him cry some more. You felt your eyes burning, you never thought that it bothers him that much. He’s the most precious person you’ve ever met in your life. You knew he would do anything to keep you away from getting hurt, from making you cry—he just wants you to be okay. But you didn’t realize it until now that he’s hurting. And you’re hurting him. You couldn’t contain your own tears from falling before you wrapped your around his neck. You buried your face on his shoulder before he could wrapped his arms around yours tightly. He shifted your weight so that you were sitting on his lap as you cried your heart out.

           “(Y/N)—”

           “Chanyeol I’m sorry…” You managed to say, “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize that I’m being selfish—I thought that… Maybe you would be happier with someone else, and what people saying are true... you deserve someone better than me!” You finally burst. “I know I should’ve been more open with you—I know I should have tell you everything, but I just didn’t want to burden you. I want you to enjoy your time with your friends, get into that study group, laugh and hang out with your friends all you want, I just didn’t want to disturb all of those moments with my problems.” You explained. “It’s not that I don’t care about you—I do care.I care about you—I love you, so much, but It seems like it came across to everybody like… like I don’t, but I actually do, but I just can’t really express those feelings for you… I’m sorry…” You cried as Chanyeol pulled you closer against his body as he hushed.

           “No, no, you don’t have to apologize…” Chanyeol whispered, as you felt his lips pressed against your temple. “I feel like I have to…” You whimpered, pulling you face away from his shoulder before you wipe the tears away with the palms of your hand. Chanyeol gently removed your hands from your face before he could wipe away your tears with his thumb.

           “I’m sorry some of the times I can’t express my feelings to you… I just didn’t want you to feel burden.” You told him, and Chanyeol shook his head.

           “It’s okay… I too, have to apologize, because I was being a bit clingy, and when I asked for the relationship to be over, I didn’t know what I was thinking—”

           “I should’ve stopped you.” You argued.

           “Did you want me to stay?” He asked.

           “I never wanted you to leave in the first place.” You confessed as a small smile appeared on his face. He planted a kiss on your forehead before he could embrace you in his arms and you let out a sigh.

           “I love you…” You whispered and you felt him nodding his head.

           “I know you do… I love you.” He said in a low voice, but clear enough to loosen your body, leaning into his arms even more.

           As you both were all cuddled in each other’s arms, you heard Chanyeol’s phone ringing before he groaned and pulled away from you to fish his phone from his pocket.

           “Yeah… No, no I’m back at my place… No, I don’t think I’ll be coming back there…” Then he chuckled, shaking his head, “Well, have fun without me, I’m staying in for the night… yeah, keep talking crap about her and I’m not coming back to that party forever!” Cahnyeol joked, and you knew that he was talking about you. “Alright… bye, see you tomorrow.” Chanyeol then hung up his phone. You looked at him as if asking who it was and what was he talking about.

           “It was Jongdae, he asked if I’m coming back to his place and that most of the people are taking part in truth or dare… and apparently some of the girls were looking for me as well.” He explained. When he didn’t saw your expression changed, he placed his hands on your face with a smile. “I told him I’m not coming back… I was hoping I could stay in with you tonight, you know, maybe just talk?”

           You nodded your head, leaning yoru head back against his shoulder.

           “Yes, you can stay here.” You told him as he hugged you tight.

           “Alright…” He kissed the top of your head as he slipped his arms under you before he could lift your whole weight. You yelped out an excitement as you wrapped your arms around his neck.

           “Let’s move to the couch, where we can cuddle comfortably.” He smiled.

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