#examinos

The shadow of him still haunted her. It didn’t happen as often now than it used to but she often thought she saw him, only to realize it was someone else completely who stood in front of her. Usually, she’d realize she was just seeing things after she did a double take. But he remained this time. Her chest tightened at the sight of him. Her Ming Yi, in the flesh. And he seemed to be walking over to where she was.

She couldn’t fathom how this could be possible. The memory of his death was still so fresh. The pain of his loss never did go away. The guilt still festered, even more so when she had to face his family after the fact. By the time he’d made it to where she was, anger was what settled. Li Jiao usually had a hold on her emotions. But usually that was when she could rationalize situations. She couldn’t help herself as her fist made contact with his chest, surely knocking out the air out of the man’s lungs. “How dare you lie to me like that,” she breathed out, noticing her breath had begun to hitch and her eyes were welling with tears.

“Oui.”

It started on her fingertips-- the odd feeling. She narrowed her eyes at the other woman, as if she were suspicious-- but really, she was just staring. She felt her cheeks heat up just at the sight of her. Was she losing her mind? The dark fairy felt light as a feather and yet she was so terrified of the feeling. Apparently the emotion that was building inside of her was far overpowered the fear as she approached the most beautiful creature she might have ever laid eyes on. “I do not think I’ve seen you around here before-- what is your name?”

“Impulsive! Nothing fun happens when you just plan out your every move… It’s much better when you act on your first instinct.”

“I’ve ran this over in my head more times than I can possibly count,” she blinked, trying not to let her tears leak. She had just begun speaking and she hated feeling like this. “If I tried to save Meng Yi, I would have died alongside him. And that would’ve been such an easy choice to make. Unfortunately, in my life, there are many more than relied on me that I could not leave behind. I’m not the only one affected by my decisions. I still had a troop that I had to lead to safety, and my family whose hearts I could not bear to break. He would’ve hated me if I stayed behind. Just like I hated him for the longest time. I hate that I completely understand why he did what he did.”