#evilishei

“You should have a cute pet name for me by now.” Nami instructed with an emphasizing poke to the nose. Given her position on top of him as they laid in bed together, naked and relaxing in their after glow. At least, he was relaxing until she posed such a ridiculous demand of him.

Scoffing, Zoro closed his eyes in the hopes of blocking out her command that was disguised as a request. “No I shouldn’t.”

He felt her cheeks puff up in defiance against his chest. “You can’t think of calling me something cute after referring to me as ‘woman’ and ‘wench’ for so long?”

“That was years ago!” Zoro barked. Eyes flying open, he made the mistake of facing off against her - literally - and bearing witness to how adorable Nami could be when she wasn’t yelling or domineering or downright infuriating.

Never before had he been so easily swayed by her puppy dog eyes before, but when she was sulking, naked on top of him, just hoping he would change his mind…

“Tch, what the hell even is a pet name? Want me to call you Nami-swan—?”

“No,” she nearly smacked him in the nose when she lifted her hand to physically put an end to that sentence. “Never that.”

That was a relief, at the very least. “I’m not calling you a queen or anything.”

There was an oddly long pause as she slowly removed her hand from his face, tucking it under her chin while she squinted at him thoughtful. Eventually, she muttered a stubborn-sounding, “Alright, then what would you be willing to call me? I’m not gonna list every pet name in existence for you.”

Irked, Zoro grumbled, “But you’re the one making this an issue.”

“Hey, I could just say that you have to call me baby—“

“No,” it was his turn to cut her off. “Never that.”

“Why not?!” Was her shockingly animated reply. Flying up so that her breasts were no longer smooshed against his stomach, Nami leered down at him with utter disappointment and tempered rage.

“B-Because it’s weird! You’re a grown woman!” He didn’t mean to, but his eyes drifted to her chest as he made his point…

Nami definitely noticed, and was obviously not amused. Whipping herself off of the bed, she collected the nightgown she’d been wearing before the slept together and threw it on her shapely body to shield it from his gaze. Then, she snapped, “You’re going to regret this, Roronoa Zoro.”

“Really? My full name?” Groaned the disgruntled naked man left alone in her bed.

Nami reached the door and looked back at him over her shoulder, defiance etched into the lines around her big brown eyes. “Yeah, and don’t say my name until you figure out what pet name you’re going to call me first!”

He couldn’t help himself from saying it when she commanded him like that! Especially when Luffy was slingshotting her out of the Crow’s Nest the way he was. Zoro jumped into his feet in the hopes that he could race to the spot she’d land in. Of course he was sleeping under her tangerine grove when she was being sent flying towards the lawn deck!

Leaping over two railings and rolling out of the impact, Zoro threw out his arms and had only a second to inhale as deeply as possible before Nami crashed into the crooks of his arms. He’d hardly braced himself before she collided with his biceps but he managed to steady himself in his legs. He felt her entire body try to take in air as he looked her over before he noticed her arms raise up so she could clear the hair that had flown into her face.

“You alright?!” He hollered with a sliver of fright. “I’ll kick his ass, that idiot!”

“Zoro,” her panting made it hard to hear her.

“Yeah?” Exclaimed Zoro.

He expected to see her winded, or frightened, or perhaps even faint in his arms. But no, after she swiped her bangs off to the side of her face, she exuded a completely different emotion.

Absolute glee.

“…You called me baby.” Nami stated it so softly, it was almost as if she had forced him to do the very thing she was smiling about.

“I… You… It wasn’t—!

“Aw, you’ve got such a big crush on me, don’t you?” Rubbing salt into the wound of her words, she brought her hands to his cheeks and pinched them both.

“HEY! You made me do that!”

“I didn’t realize you needed to call out to me just to catch me. Wooow, is that the secret to all that hunky strength of yours?”

“Naaamiii-!”

She slapped his cheeks in a familiar fit of rage. Only she’d never yelled the following words at him before, “No! If you think you’re going to sleep with me and NOT call me something cute, you’re insane!”

“You should have told me that before then!”

“What, are you saying that you’re gonna stop having sex with me because I’m telling you to call me baby?!”

Ooh, she got him there. Gritting his teeth, it took all of his might to answer her honestly, “No.”

“Then say, ‘Okay, baby~”, just like that.”

“I’d rather die.” He fully admitted.

Nami snickered, “Just say it.”

“Nami,” his tone was filled with the hint of a warning. “No.”

“Say my pet name,” her voice dropped low, into that register she used when she was trying to seduce him. Having her in his arms at a moment like this was dangerous. Very dangerous. “And we can go have some make up sex right now.”

He didn’t even realize they were fighting…but that offer was really tempting.

Really, really, really tempting.

Refusing to be jerked around verbally any longer, Zoro decided to take matters into his own hands. Rising up, Nami squeaked as he spun around and tossed her over his shoulder. “LUFFY! GET THE HELL OUT OF THE CROW’S NEST!”

He heard some kind of cheer from above but Nami’s shrieking drowned it out as he reached the ladder. “What the hell are you doing!?”