A: You should really do your Playwriting homework.

B: No, I don't want to. I'm tired.

A: But you need to actually do your assignments early in the semester, so that later in the semester, when everything comes crashing down on you because you've signed up for too many things, you have some leeway. This is how it starts. You don't do one assignment and then you think you can skip them all. And then you fail.

B: But.... but... I've been running around all day. Surely I've earned some time to just vedge and awkwardly dance around my room to my Anyone Can Whistle cast recording. Maybe some chocolate? And there's a pile of books next to my bed. Just give me fifteen minutes.

A: NO. DO YOUR HOMEWORK.

B: I DON'T HAVE ANY CREATIVE IDEAS.

A: Well then maybe you should just write something to get it over with.

B: Shut up.

A: No.

B: No, but really. Shut up. I hate you. If you didn't care so much about your stupid grades, you'd be a lot happier. In my next life I just want to be something simple. Like a buttercup. I just want to be a buttercup. None of this whole "I want to be an actor" thing. Yeah. Let's choose a career that's impossibly difficult. That's a great idea!

A: Stop whining. Karmically you'd be lucky to get buttercup. With your penchant for being an asshole, surely you're going to be something worse. Probably something involving slime.

B: Argh.

A: You're going to fail everything this term. Everything.

B: No, I'm not. I haven't failed anything in like, three years. I can actually pass for a responsible adult now.

A: Who are you fooling? I don't see a responsible anything. Just write something. You had an entire week to do this assignment. You don't get to use the excuse of "Oh, I've just been so busy with rehearsal." Surely you could have found the time.

B: But I hate writing.


A: No you don't. You hate feeling stressed out that you need to come up with something quality. When you don't put so much pressure on yourself to be brilliant, you're fine. And oh look, you've gone and just churned out something. You've got two pages here. But surely you aren't actually going to hand this in. Like, you could have actually come up with fictional characters and a fictional situation. This is kinda cheating.