When I was a child, when Mother and Mama Adelie had a fight, Mama Adelie came home with flowers. Whatever she could get within the confines of her pay, I'm sure. More frequently than not, they were oldroses. Yellow, Mother's favorite color. She sniffed them once when she got them, and put them in a pretty blue vase in the window. "They're dying, you know," she told me. "It's actually sort of cruel to give them. They're picked because they're beautiful, and then we display them as they die."
The moment they were brown on the edges she said, "They’re wilting. How depressing. Throw them out.”
I used to whisper an apology to them as I dumped them in the bin. "You are still beautiful," I said. I did not see why something was less beautiful as it died. We are all dying, after all - flowers just more quickly.
But she never asked Mama Adelie to stop giving her flowers. Mama Adelie stopped after many turns. The fights got so poisonous no flower to could hope to cleanse them. And then she left.
The irony never missed my mind, really.
She used to sit in windows and call out to men. I did too, before the cold came and we shuttered them.
A few times men sent me flowers. I always kept them in their vase until their petals fell off. They were beautiful as they slowly choked to death, just like me - I fancied. I laid the petals to dry in a bowl, and when they were ready, I used them in the bath.
Multi-purpose beauty. Like mine.
When I left that life behind and got married, I saved the bouquet. Red, pink and white oldroses for Valentione's. Some part of me wished to keep every arrangement, to fill our apartment with it, but that seemed a bit too much. I kept my bouquet. I hung it upside-down in a closet until it dried out.
I wonder if it's strange, to let things wither and die on purpose. Sometimes I think that's what my husband did to me. Locked me up, expecting that I would still be waiting, still, some light, fragile semblance of what I once was. Beautiful, gentle and fragrant. His to preserve.
We didn't really fight that much. At least, I couldn't call it fighting. He made me miserable, and so I acted badly. But he did not want me to leave, no, he was the one to leave. He must've wanted that duty. He never bought me flowers.
For a little while, I wished he would have turned up with a bouquet and a smile and an apology. But he never did.
I gave a man I liked a flower after he said he loved me. He gave it to someone else.
Abelaire bought me a flower to put in my hair the third time we met.
I pressed it in a heavy book, I did not let it dry and wither. It is dead, still, but frozen in that colorful moment. This time, it is alright, I think, to not sit and stare as I watch it die, or hide it somewhere out of sight as it dries up.
He brings me flowers all the time - hairpins, bouquets, and he tends a beautiful garden in the house we share.
As for my dried wedding bouquet, I put it in the bin.
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8. Nicknames? & if so, how did they originate? (your choice on pairing :0)
OTP Question Meme!
Etienne frequently uses diminutives on everyone, both sincerely and sarcastically, so really, it’s about tone and context for Abelaire. Occasionally they layer them on all at once, usually if they want him to do something, “Won’t you please… darling, dearest, beautiful?’ etc. Very, very, rarely, when they’re alone, Etienne will call him ‘beloved.’ While they’ve never ICly commented on it, I think they wanted something to denote that special relationship and love between them.
Abelaire calls Etienne ‘my dove’. He called them that as they were jokingly roleplaying an angel and a devil at a costume party, but he found out it absolutely turns Etienne to jelly so he likes to call on them that way. In a similar vein he’ll call Etienne ‘my queen.’
Kadin started teasing Avos and calling him ‘old man’ in private after he said something self-deprecating about their age and energy differences (Avos is 4 or 5 years older than Kadin).
Pelhi calls Screaming Inferno her ‘goddess’, which I feel like is more of a source of amusement than an ego boost to her, but it’s still quite cute.
Thanks for the ask, @rolanberrycheesecake ! Sorry for leaving at this at the bottom of my inbox, I genuinely thought I’d replied to it already.
