#entry9

I've got the strangest experience today.

It is the first time I have visited a new place – or rather, a very ancient one, by the looks of it – called the Tower. I thought it was going to be a tall, narrow building I would be able to hide in, and from where I could fire ballista onto passing Monsters. But I was so wrong!

The place itself is huge, entirely made of ruins and cobblestone, it looks like it could be an extinct city. A few Aptonoths and a lot of vegetation have taken over the area. The feel I get from these ruins... is extremely familiar, and still mysterious. As I moved inside the tower itself, I noticed how old it was; and most importantly, that there were writings on the walls. And drawings, half-erased due to the action of time. The fact that parts of the tower were partly destroyed doesn't help the conservation of the treasure left by the civilization that once erected this building.

All I had to do was eliminating a few Remobras that had invaded the place, but I'll definitely come back to study it further.

“YOU BROUGHT YOUR DOG??!!” 

Marcus Rodriguez -

“Magic, Alchemy, Explorers & Pirates.... Shots of a magical nature: wizards, alchemy, herbalists, druids and magic - also, explorers and pirates!”

This is my generation, my time. Yet I feel so defeated and not up to par.

My previous senti posts were all related to this—the fear and anxiety of ending up being jobless. I am really fearful of that idea which has been lurking at the back of my mind since the end of 2019 when I finished my internship. It intensified when I got my transcript of records in February and when I was rejected at my first ever job application.

My first job application was in the municipal government of our town, I took advantage of my Civil Service that was why I applied for it. And to be honest, because I know the salary and the benefits would be really good. But I was not accepted and I moved on quickly, thinking that it was not for me.

Then as I was gearing up to apply in different companies, the novel coronavirus pandemic happened. The whole Luzon was put into a lockdown. I felt like the world was against me that time.

But hey, there is the internet and online application is the trend nowadays. So I took advantage of that.

I sent applications after applications, resumés to cover letters, emails to text messages until some companies called me.

Here comes this one company that accepted me. I WAS ACCEPTED. I AM TO BE EMPLOYED. I WANTED TO TELL EVERYONE THAT.

BUT GOOD THING I DID NOT.

Because now, I will end up turning down the job offer. As much as I want to accept—because you know there is that voice inside this head that keeps whispering negative comments like this offer will be the only and last—the salary will be more or less just equal to what would be my daily expenses. It is just a breakeven. Not even considering my travel time and the company location as it is in Makati.

Data Visualization is a key part of any piece of data being presented to a community. In this case, it was the lack of understandable and clear visualizations that could’ve possibly been the cause of the challenger disaster. In 1986, the challenger, briefly after its launch, exploded, killing everyone aboard. As much of a tragedy that was, new evidence leads some analysts to believe that it was in-efficient data visualizations that lacked the clarity to reason with the high up’s in control of the launch. Some speculate that if those has been more efficient, handled the material better, and were more clear, that the engineers would’ve been able to convince the shuttle not to launch. Now, technology and rhetoric has vastly changed and improved since 1986, yet the question still arises. As you can see in the visualizations themselves, there is no color, and all the information is pushed closely together. Even without any advanced engineering information, the images look confusing and unbalanced. Everything is placed so tightly packed that interpreting it is complicated and not thought out. And for some executive with little knowledge but what he is given explanation, this, in my opinion, makes a good case for explaining why the launch happened.

Akala ko ang aming huling common module ay patungkol sa Drugs dahil sa parte ng kurikulum ng mga NSTP sa buong bansa ay pagkakaroon ng daan para pangatwiran ang kasalukuyang war on drugs. Buti nalang "Citizenship and Nationalism" ang naging pagtatapos ng aming common module rito. Maganda siyang paglalagom at pagtatapos ng lahat na natutunan sa mga nakaraang meeting upang malaman kung paano na nating tutugunan ang bawat isyu na tinalakay. Hindi tayo naiiwan sa kawalan at tinatanong sa sarili "Ano na?" o, mas nakababagabag, malilimutan na lamang.

Sa diskusyon ni Ma'am Presto, tinalakay niya ang pagkakaiba ng batayan ng pagiging parte ng isang nasyon at estado. Kung ang citizenship ay nakapatungkol sa pagiging kabilang natin ng isang bansa at sinusundan ang mga batas at konstitusyon nito, ang nationalism ay mas kultural at panlipunan. Napapabilang tayo sa isang "nasyon" o komunidad dahil sa pagkakakilanlan natin sa pare-parehas na kasaysayan, kultura, at iba pa. Dito nabubuo ang nasyunalismo na siyang, (supposedly), magpapakilos sa mamamayan na sumapi sa citizenship.

Ang problema ko rito, na siyang idiniin naman din ni Ma'am Presto, na ang pag-iisip na ganito ay pinipisat ang kulturang Pilipino na para bang iisa lang umiiral na kultura, wika, relihiyon, pagidirwang, at iba pa. Sa pagkakaroon ng higit 7000 na isla, hindi natin pwede ipilit ang pagkakaroon ng isang identidad na galing sa aspeto ng kultura. Hindi nga lahat ng wika sa Pilipinas ay mayroong 'po' at 'opo'. Nagkakaroon pa nga ng diskriminasyon sa pagitan ng iba't ibang grupo dahil sa sa iba't ibang paniniwala. Ano ngayon ang nakakapagkaisa sa mga Pilipino? Mula sa pag-aaral ko ng kasaysayan, ito ang sama-samang pakikibaka o collective struggle natin laban sa mga kolonisador at iba't ibang tanikala. Ito ang hindi masyadong nadidiinan sa pag-aaral ng kasaysayan ng bansa sa mga history subjects natin sa paaralan. Iniisip ng DepEd at CHED kung paano papayabungin ang damdaming makabayan ng mga mag-aaral upang paglingkuran nila ang sambayanan (kaya naman may NSTP) pero ang daming mga asignatura na tinatanggal gaya ng Filipino sa ilalim ng CHED Memo 20  at kahit ang Philippine history! Paano kaya mabubuo ang nasyunalismo at "citizenship" kung ang mga avenue upang pag-aralan ito ay tatanggalin? Kung sabagay ay hindi nga natin ito maasahan kung parte pa rin ang mga institusyon na ito ang reaksyunaryong estado na, syempre, nais panatilihin ang kanilang kapangyarihan.

Kaya sa naangangambang politikal na sitwasyon ngayon, dapat humihigit na tayo sa pagiging "socially aware" na lamang. Ito ang pagkakaroon ng sensitivity dahil "aware" tayo sa pagkakaiba-iba natin. Ngunit hinihingi na sa atin ang mangahas at militanteng pagtutunggali sa hegemonya na ito - hindi na lamang sa maayos na pakikisalamuha sa iba bagkus ay inaaral na natin kung bakit ganito ang lipunan at kung paano natin ito babaguhin. Ito ang ginagawa ng isang aktibista - kung saan man sa political spectrum ang kanilang kinabibilangan. Hindi naman kinakalaban ng mga aktibista ang nakasanayan nang kultura at lipunan nang hindi pinag-aaralan ito dahil dito rin nabubuo ang mga plano at solusyon. Dapat pa nga mas pinapalawak ang kaalaman sa pagkikipagtalastasan dahil dito mas napapatalas at nahahamig ang mga tao na sumama sa laban ng pagpapalaya ng bansa.